Mixing feeding - refusing breast :(

[Confused40]

Been told dd isn't gaining weight quick enough so have felt forced to give bottle of formula. Been giving maybe one to two a day and expressing milk too. Dd is now not wanting to bf and gets stressed until I give her a bottle. How do I keep her bf and still incorporate a bottle? I desperately want to keep bf.

Hettybetty123 I'm really touched that you joined so you could send me a message. That means so much to me.
I had dd 6 week check up today. Since last Wednesday she has gone from 3.2kg to 3.8kg. Just from adding formula and bf too. It shows that I want enough for her.
For those that have said just feed bf well I agree with some of those that have said that some women don't produce enough milk. I believe I am one of those women. It has to be remembered that all women's circumstance are different and this can play a significant role in the bf relationship.
I'm seeing my HV tomorrow and plan on going to another bf support group. I love bf my little one and I'd like to continue, but ultimately her health is paramount over my needs.
It's so lovely hearing from others about their experiences. It makes me feel that I'm not alone. Bf is so challenging and I really didn't think it would be. I'm determined to give it my best as I have up till now. Dd is a very hungry child. At 6 weeks she is having 6ozs formula and bf. guess that's why she's put on so much weight.
Thanks for all helping me to feel so much better. There is huge pressure to bf and not a lot of support.

Glad you're feeling better. I remember those really desperate nights where I was so upset about the whole thing and just kept searching Mumsnet hoping someone was in the same boat as me.

BF groups were a real lifesaver for me. And weirdly babies seem to eat much better when they're there - maybe because we're more relaxed? But they can be a bit anti-formula so ignore them if they say anything that sounds a bit bonkers... when I told them dd sometimes moved her head away mid-bottle one woman said "Aha, she's allergic to formula!" which she isn't. So take in all the good stuff and discard the mad stuff...

Rummi - about 4 years.

Tiktok, thanks, that's interesting. And a good change.

I'm ecstatic today! Dd was weighed by health visitor. She is now 3.9kg or 8lb 9ozs. It seems mixed feeding is working for her. She's still taking the breast too so I'm really happy

Great news confused, it's great you've found something that works for you both

Hi confused, I've just come across your thread and have read it with interest because I've also been having breastfeeding issues so wanted to say I'm going through a really similar thing at the moment and you are not alone right now.

My DS is now 2 weeks old and although the BF is going much better now than initially, it is still unpredictable and challenging sometimes so we have been giving him the odd bottle of my expressed milk just to make sure he gets the food in him.

He took to the breast really slowly after birth so I had to hand express the colostrum to feed him. He was then diagnosed with tongue tie so had that snipped at 1 week old and that did improve things, although it hasnt solved them completely. He sometimes really fights to latch on which is heartbreaking because I know he's hungry but he screams and smacks my breast in frustration. I have to mentally psych myself up to persevere, especially when it's a tired night feed.

My HV comes tomorrow and midwife on Friday so I'm praying that I have good news like you and that he's put on enough weight. At the end of the day his health is all that matters so I hope that, like you, us doing 'what works for us' (mainly breast but some expressed milk top ups from a bottle) is also going to pay off.

All the best x

Hi jessw25, congratulations on the birth of your ds. Really glad my thread has helped you. No-one prepares you for how difficult bf can be huh? Dd is a content baby now I'm topping her up with formula. I was gutted when I thought I'd have to stop bf but I didn't and am bf dd as I'm typing this. Please let me know how you get on with HV. It's such pressure on mothers having the added worry of how much weight our lo's are gaining. Night feeding is better for us as I give dd formula and she seems happy with it. I always bf at each feed and then top up with formula.
It's such a personal and individual choice how we feed our babies and I'm so glad for the support on mn and hearing about how others cope. Lo are little so such a small time and we should be enjoying them and not stressing about them feeding. Easier said than done at times.

Phew, HV came yesterday and he has put on more weight than was expected and is well past the birth weight, yay :-) You're right confused, no one prepares you for how difficult bf can be, I just assumed he'd be ok to feed on it straightaway.

Just goes to show I sholdn't get too complacent though because after a good day feeding yesterday morn and the good news from the HV which proved that however hard it's been, the weight gain shows we're doing it right for him.... he had a really hard afternoon/evening feeding :-( Had a bit of a teary meltdown this morning because was so disappointed he seemed to have taken a backwards step with the bf and was doing the whole being hungry but crying/smacking fist on my breast and not really being able to latch on which breaks my heart :-( But he is back to 'normal' now so I guess it's all ok and i just need to realise that he's not the world's best feeder so sometimes he will have off times.

Wishing you the best of luck with your lovely daughter :-) Thanks again for your post because when I've had the down times, it's given me strength knowing someone else is going through/has been through a similar thing at the same newborn stage as me xx

Hi confused. When you top up after each feed how much do you offer? Just interested as I do three 90ml throughout the day and just want to know what others do. Really glad your little one is gaining x