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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Nursing strike in toddler

11 replies

bewareoftheswan · 09/07/2013 10:10

I am 17 weeks pregnant and BF DD who is 19 months. Saturday evening she bit me while latching on, I screamed, she got very upset, and since then she has refused to go anywhere near my boob...
I wouldn't be devastated if she self-weaned at some point tbh, but I don't want it to be like this...
I have tried offering frequently but not pressuring her, we had a bath yesterday, I co-slept naked with her last night. When she woke up this morning she said 'milk' but then said 'no, no, no' when I tried to latch her on. A lot of the other tricks I have read seem aimed at younger babies - I'm not convinced she's going to be tricked by a different position/location etc.
Anyone have any experience or or advice? At what point do I have to reconcile myself to this being The End?
If it makes any difference her teeth are clearly hurting her, and she is grumpy because of the heat, so not in the best of moods generally...
Thanks!

OP posts:

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 09/07/2013 13:55

I have read that being pregnant makes the milk taste not as nice. Also, why would you want to "trick" her when she's clearly indicating she's had enough?

Original poster

bewareoftheswan · 09/07/2013 16:10

Wow, err thanks for that

Just in case my original post wasn't clear, and you're not just a random with ishoos...
I wouldn't be devastated if I thought she had self-weaned, either because of the pregnancy or in the general run of things.
However, nothing I've read (which I suspect is more than you have) suggests this is self-weaning. I've spoken at length to a La Leche leader who agreed with me. A lot of the advice she gave me, and other things I've read, seem more likely to work on a younger baby, and what I was hoping for was for some tips/ support from people who may have been in a similar situation.
Of course I would never trick her/force her/gently persuade her if I thought she was indicating that she'd had enough.
I hope I never turn into the kind of person who vents at vulnerable women seeking support - why even open a thread about this if you know jack shit about it? The world is a crazy place sometimes....

OP posts:

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 09/07/2013 16:22

From the anger you've barely restrained in that post, I would suggest I'm not the one with issues. She has stopped at the moment...your post is about you...and about "reconciling yourself" so what if her weaning isn't "textbook" or perfect but it is what it is. Good luck in your endeavors though.

Cheeseatmidnight · 09/07/2013 16:30

Maybe you could squeeze some milk out so she can see it coming - dd is fascinated when I do this.

Also, could you show her some pics with bf babies on.

You may just have to accept that this may have triggered her to realise she doesn't want to any more,

Original poster

bewareoftheswan · 09/07/2013 16:50

Thanks Cheese, I'll try that!

OP posts:

BoysAreLikeDogs · 09/07/2013 17:09

Well yes you did refer to tricking, and Neo made a good point about the milk tasting different, have heard this too.

I was going to suggest babymooning, free access to boobs, cosleeping topless, bathing together, you have tried all of that, so I am not really sure what else you can do.

Your supply should be quite robust, have you been expressing to keep it up while you continue to encourage a return to the breast?

gamerchick · 09/07/2013 17:16

Maybe she's just ready to wean
personally I would just leave it and take her cues. She may go back to it but I wouldn't try and force the issue.

Original poster

bewareoftheswan · 09/07/2013 21:29

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to offer advice, it's much appreciated...

OP posts:

TwasBrillig · 09/07/2013 21:36

Can you accept she might be ready to wean? What would it mean for you if she was? You've said you're anxious about how its finished but you have given her plenty of opportunity so its not like you've refused her at all. You've done really well!

bimbabirba · 09/07/2013 23:05

Hang on everyone, maybe she is not ready to wean?
OP my DS did exactly that when he was only a few months old. He bit me, I screamed, he cried and then refused to latch on for a couple of days. It broke my heart! I felt so guilty that I had hurt him (emotionally).
I totally get what you mean about not wanting it to end this way. At 19 months your DD probably understands a lot of what you say to her so this is a frat advantage that you have. Why don't you try telling her "mummy has lots of nice milk for you, come here, give me a cuddle, I would like to give you some milk".
I think in a couple of days' time she will have forgotten about it and will feed again.
Good luck OP!

3littlefrogs · 09/07/2013 23:14

Mine all self weaned at about this age. I was sad, but just accepted that they were ready to move on. I think they all do it in their own time, when they are ready.

It is hard, but, if you think about it, it is bound to happen sooner or later and maybe it is for the best as the new baby will be coming and it might just be easier if your Dd has moved on before your little one is needing to be constantly attached (as mine were!!)

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