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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Advice for a reluctant breastfeeder?

26 replies

easterbaby · 14/06/2013 15:01

I'm expecting DC2 in November. Already have a gorgeous 15mo DS.
I hated bf and gave up after 3 weeks of pain and exhaustion. It was such a relief to let my body heal/relax, and to bond with my boy.
Instinctively, I don't want to bf again (we ended up being very contented bottle feeders!) but my DH wants me to try with our newborn, so I will.

Last time, my postnatal carers were awful (with the exception of my wonderful GP, who fixed the problems they caused.) I'm putting plans in place for a better deal this time. Eg, I will check myself out of hospital within hours (all being well) and am hoping to book a private midwife to replace my NHS postnatal care.

I'd like impartial and experienced advice on bf, but have no idea where to get it. I tried NCT and La Leche League last time, but was a bit damaged by the propaganda (eg, I was told that I was artificially feeding my baby when I had to supplement with formula milk - this made me feel like such a failure.) I wasn't physically well enough to go outside by myself in the first few weeks, so I missed out on visiting bf clinics. DH refused to take me when I asked him to - he has been told this won't be acceptable next time! :-)

When DS was a few months old, my GP said he has a high palate and it may have contributed to our bf problems. It wasn't picked up by any of the bf counsellors or midwives who visited, or suggested by NCT/LLL.

Does anyone have any tips/advice on dealing with high palates? And bf second time round, after mostly bottle feeding your first DC?

As a second timer, I feel less vulnerable than before, but want to protect myself from the judgemental views of those who think formula milk is no better than poison! It's very likely that I will supplement at some stage in the first year. I wlt give DC2 the best nutritional start and realise that bf is pretty good for mums. Although I dispute the idea that the best bonding comes with bf - DS and I released lots of oxytocin with closeness, cuddles and kisses alone!

Also interested to find out about combination feeding. The NHS midwives only pushed this when I said I was giving up, but by that stage I couldn't face the boob again. I think it might help me to extend bf for longer.

OP posts:
Phineyj · 18/06/2013 09:48

I would have been Angry with DH if he had taken that line - it's not his body.

I got balanced advice from an independent midwife who was happy to support me whatever I chose. I suspect she is probably a bf enthusiast but because I was the 'customer' so to speak, when my DH and I realised it was not for us she helped us to FF.

Good luck whatever you decide to do and I hope it works out well.

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