10 month old wriggling - think I've got us into a real mess :(

[Laradaclara]

My 10 month old has increasingly become more and more difficult to feed. She will grab at me, kick, whip her head around while still attached and always wants to stand if feeding. During the day she'll normally be calm enough/hungry enough to feed well enough so that is still manageable.

My difficulty is that I've always put her to sleep by feeding her. This has worked really well up until recent weeks. Now I just can't get her to settle. She's obviously tired but shes immediately trying to stand up and do her usual wriggly tricks and I can't keep her still enough to sleep. After an hour of trying this with us both getting more upset I give up and my DP sticks her in the car which is our only other successful tactic. I really don't want to resort to this. She's had loads of teeth coming through so I've been hoping its this although she's perfectly sunny during the day and doesn't obviously appear in pain so I'm not sure if that's just a red herring.

I feel I should have tried to get her to learn to sleep without feeding but its worked so well up til now. I feel really annoyed with myself for not putting a bit more effort into getting her to sleep by herself earlier.

Is there any way I can get her to feed more calmly? Should we carry on as we are for a bit longer in the hope it is teething and will pass? Or should we start emergency sleep training and if so where on earth to start?

Any thoughts or experience greatly appreciated.

I fed DS until 8.5 months. He had reflux and had never learned to settle himself. At 11 months with return to work rapidly approaching, I had to resort to controlled crying.

It's brutal, but sometimes necessary.

TBH I'm not very patient with the whinging, last week I shut the door so I couldn't hear DD2 when she wouldn't settle.

Bless you both. Sounds normal to me. I think some kids go through this phase when there are huge brain & body developments going on.
This too shall pass. Hang in there.
My DS is now 12 mo & much easier to deal with at bfs & at bedtime. I still feed him to sleep most nights, although there was a period when daddy had to rock him nearly every night as he was so wriggly.
I've also resorted to lying next to him on our bed. Bf lying down. He eventually drifts off & then one of us lifts him into his own bed.
Bless them. The Wonder Weeks book really helped me stick at it as the authors explain brain development & how it might impact their behaviors at different points. Invaluable resource which I turn to whenever the going gets tough!!

It will pass. Good luck

Btw I avoid sleep training as it sounds awful. & I'm too lazy to do it!!!! Why would I do something so unnatural (ignore a needy child) that has to be repeated every time something breaks the magic (holiday, illness, new teeth etc!).
Follow your instincts.

I'm absolutely sure it's nothing you've done. We are in exactly the same boat with our 10mo Ds. I've actually been in tears once or twice because I just can't get him to sleep! It's so frustrating when bf to sleep used to work like a charm. I've got everything crossed that this too shall pass. Ds also seems much worse when he's overtired so we've tried bringing bedtime a bit earlier which seems to help sometimes. Hope it passes for you soon.

I go through this with my little girl who is also 10 months old. I find if she's being super wriggly on the breast and won't settle. I just turn my back on her and let her roll around and play for a few minutes, pick her up lay her down tell her it's night night time, and then turn my back to her. I repeat. It normally takes about 20 minutes. Then there comes a point where it's no longer fun for her and she starts getting upset. That is when I feed her and she usually settles. However, all babies are different, but it's what I found works for me sometimes.

I hope tonight goes better OP.
my 12 mo DS was a nightmare last night.
I bf him to sleep at 7pm. He was exhausted after an afternoon of playing in the garden with his 4yo cousin. Learning to kick a ball, improving his walking & generally having a lovely time. However he woke at 8pm & would not go back to sleep!!! In the end I brought him downstairs to see his granny & great granny. He was wide awake I can tell you
In the end I went to bed with him at 930pm, played lullabies from my iPhone & snuggled down with boobs out. I think I fell asleep before him but he was having a lovely time bf & singing
Luckily he did not wake me until 7am. I'm thankful for small mercies!!!!!!