Help- I am so tired...

[ellangirl]

4.5 month old dd is hard work. Bf not always been easy for me but her weight gain is fine. She is a rotten sleeper, both day and night. At the moment we're at 2-3 hourly intervals between feedings day and night. I am very tired and run down, just had mastitis and then had bad reaction to antibiotics so had the runs really badly for a few days (sorry tmi!) she is teething, and only wants me to settle her (feeding) but even then she cries a lot before every sleep. She won't take a dummy or a bottle. She is always congested due to having so many colds since she was born.
What do I try? I am so tired...have 3 year old ds too so no respite.

Oh dear, I feel for you. It is hard having a baby and a pre-schooler. My 5.5 month old DD2 also feeds 2-3 hourly round the clock and I have a 2 year old at home. Do you co-sleep? I wasn't keen on doing it but it really is the only thing that enables me to get some sleep and feel a bit more rested during the day. Also, I find that getting out of the house every day helps me to feel more awake, even if I really don't feel like doing it. Will your Ds have some "quiet time" playing in his room so that you could get a bit of rest during the day? Hope things improve for you soon.

Poor you, it can be overwhelming can't it. Are you taking car of yourself, eating well and taking vitamins? What sort of help do you get? Do you have someone who can let you have some lie ins and will take them both out for an hour?

Try to take things as easy as you can, if finances allow get a cleaner, even if its just for a few weeks and do your shopping online too. So much easier than lugging 2dc around a supermarket.

If she won't take a bottle, will she take a cup? Have a look here and here. There will also be lots of threads in the Mn archive on bottle refusal.

If she is crying before she sleeps in the day, where is she sleeping?

Does the 3 year old go to childcare? If so, what do you do with your time?

If Lo is congested, have you tried steam and a nasal aspirator?

Hope you start feeling better soon.

Xposted with grace.

Thanks both
Will try a cup. Not sure whether to try formula or not. Feel quite anti but no idea why- ds was formula fed from 8 weeks. Prob over emotional about it because dd will be last baby due to fertility issues.

She seems especially distressed and overtired today- sounds hares so think she might have sore throat. Have co- slept at times but doesn't really help. Daytime sleeps in baby swing or sling. She seems genuinely distressed to be away from me at the moment so dh not really able to help much. No other help forthcoming, tho ds does go to nursery 2 mornings. Tend to try to rest then but dd sleeps so little in day.

Never thought of myself as a getting a cleaner type, but I am struggling to do enough housework. Bit useless

Hoarse, not hares!

You are not useless, you are recovering from an illness, coping with a poorly baby and a toddler.

If she's teething, have you tried ibuprofen? If she won't settle for DH could he take dc1 out for a bit and you could have a rest with Lo?

Pressed post too soon. If she's hoarse I can understand her wanting only you. My 5yo is the same ATM, we are joined at the hip. Have you tried nhs direct?

Can understand totally why you feel like that about the formula. It's a tough choice isn't it and only you can decide. One thing is for sure though, the BM will give her comfort plus the antibodies from you

Can recommend snufflebabe for the cold - rub a bit on their chest & soles of the feet before bed. If LO has a cold, she might be struggling to feed and not helping your mastitis or LO and their sleeping.

I had a bottle refuser too and tried everything to no avail. In the end I just went with it until she took a beaker.

Get plenty of vitamins down you & as much rest as you can(!) and know that this too shall pass.

I always forget about snuffle babe because our DS was allergic to it, but he's the only one I've ever met who is (typically) and it is good stuff.

Just wanted to say thank you for your support and advice. Still not getting sleep, but feeling slightly less hysterical about it! Dh has tomorrow off, so going to get as much rest as poss over next 3 days and find a minute to do things like have a bath and eat chocolate healthily!

He's hoping you have a bit of a break then. How are you feeling apart from the sleeplessness? Have you recovered and how is Lo now?