Why is bf past one year so uncommon?

[BimbaBirba]

Rant alert!
I stayed with DS at nursery for his first settling in session today and all the nursery workers were truly that I'm still bf! And even more when I said that he never had a bottle and never tried formula.
They looked at each other and sneered, then I heard one ask a colleague, who has children, how long was it ok to bf for? She replied "about 7 months". So I said that actually the WHO recommends at least two years. Her face dropped, silly cow (probably she's never even heard of WHO anyway)
So I'm left wondering why on earth it's so "weird" that a little boy is still bf at one?
I'm quite annoyed too!

It's cultural. I've just moved from a place where everyone seems to bf (westcountry) to a place that makes me feel like I've got 2 heads for many of the things I've taken for granted, including using slings and breastfeeding. Ds is 9 mo and I have no intention of stopping but so far I've met a lot of resistance. My older relatives down here put every malaise he has down to me still bfing, including my very well meaning nan who constantly tells me 'well if your milk dries up, he'd have to take a bottle'. This is with regards to sleep mostly. If I even mention his waking during the night, it's because he's 'spoiled' I was relieved to get a visit from the health visitor last week, who had come to meet us and bring us info about the local clinics. I was expecting to be met with more reprimands about still bfing, but she was lovely about it. He weighed in at an ounce less than last month and she said lots of her colleagues would put it down to the milk, but she could see he was happy and just never still. But, and perhaps a big but, we had a good long talk abtou the resistance that met towards bfing since moving and she said she'd noticed the attitude too. She is African and said to her it's completely normal (she mentioned the WHO advice too) but said since moving to the area about 6 months ago it's made her really sad to see how many women don't even try to bf. We're in the Fens, pretty deprived and not much social mobility here. People bottlefeed because it's what their friends and relatives aer seen to be doing.

I'm in a wealthy area of the country so it's not a class thing like people think, or at least not significantly IMO.

Are the bursery workers very young? Do they have dc of their own? It's possible I'd have thought it strange before I actually breastfed myself iyswim

nursery sorry. Have a poorly boy on my lap (bfing )

When dc1 was 13 months, one of the meddling old bats at her nursery informed me that 'your breast milk goes bad after 6 months'.

She'd been having horrible nappies due to teething, hence why she came out with that gem. Mind you this was in Italy, where old wives tales abound.

I ended up bf until she was 2.5, although latterly only morning and evening. No one really knew unless I told them or they were sat next to us on a plane.

The nursery worker = signora (molto) stronza

As lomg as it doesnt go on till the childs seven.....

Actually there has been research that's estimated the natural weaning age of humans to be between 2.5-7 years. Not many go on that long but there are a few and there's nothing to show that it's harmful to the child. Everyone has a cut off point that is personal to them.

I pay childcare facilities for their care of my child not their opinion on how long I breastfeed for. That's irrelevant.

MN044 I'm in the Fens-ish. :) You are right about the culture around here!

MN044 - i'm in the west country and when i went to bf then 1 yr old ds at our baby and toddler group they looked at me like i was giving him smack. Don't go anymore!

He's now over 2 and i'm still bf him up to 5 times a day, but am finding i am increasingly self conscious about feeding him in public. I even get the odd comment from my mum (who isn't normally judgemental about my parenting) about me 'spoiling' him. I think, as ever, people pass judgement on those who do things differently to them. I think what EauRouge said is right - there seems to be a deep seated belief that you will somehow harm your child if you don't start to detach from them. Sad.

Yes, there are some odd views about. However, the only slightly negative thing anyone has ever said to me was that she chose to FF because her SiL had fed her DS for 6 years and that put her off. I did point out that no one had to BF for 6 years....

Someone even said to me the other day '18 months, that's still a baby really' and that was someone who didn't breast feed herself. So there are enlightened people out there.

Oh eau, be my friend . I feel like I've moved to the back of beyond and tbh am already planning my swift retreat back to the westcountry. I've come back to the place I grew up and nothing's changed. Noone's left, it's like some kind of weirdy twilight zone. And I've been housebound with 3 poorly children and noone to come round for a gossip or mercy coffee mission. It's been a bit of a culture shock I tell you.

Tell a lie though, one week before Christmas I was in Cambridge and stopped to bf ds near the Grafton. A lovely lady with a preschool age dd sat on the bench next to me, offfered me a chip, and told her dd how lucky ds was for getting some lovely milk. So there are nice people around. But I'm a bit further in the sticks, am currently throwing around the idea of moving to Cambridge proper rather than back West. Seems a bit more civilized

Quite aside from BF I wouldn't out my child in tht nursery. Is there another option? A different one or a CM?

I know people that live in Cambridge and only leave if they're going to London

Poor you. I'm only just realising that bfing is seen as unusual much past 6 months. Met a mum with a younger baby the other day and she was asking for advice on how many ozs of milk she should be aiming for etc (my ds is almost 7 months). I said sorry I didn't know about formula and she looked so shocked that I hadn't ever given any. I do actually have some in the cupboard, am not saying there's anything wrong with it at all, but I just never got round to bothering with it as bfing worked out. Was just surprised that she thought it so odd. I hope I do get to a year too, well done you :-)

Since DD2 didn't give up BFing until long long after she started school. I don't find anything odd in BFing a one year old.
She hates milk and has never used a bootle.

She did whole days at nursery from about 18 months, I don't remember any one asking if she still BF. They and preschool seem to cope just fine with her refusing to drink milk.

Thanks you guys for cheering me up and giving me confidence in my choices. You're awesome

Another reason some people give up is because of teeth. My cousin stop bfing her DS at around 10mths as he kept biting her and she couldn't get him to stop.
I have had biters and it is quite hard but luckily they never bit very hard and they stopped quite quickly.
I bf DS until he was 2.7 and DD is 19mo and still going strong. I am luckily as I know quite a few mums who have bfd for a year and beyond, even though where I live breastfeeding rates a re very low.
I don't think that nursery sounds very good either, is there any others you could go see?

MN044 I live in central Cambridge and most of the people I know bf their babies (or at least bf for a few months). I am still bf my 23 month old, make no secret of it, and have never had any negative comments.

I often see other women bf their babies and toddlers in coffee shops and other public places, including (last summer) a mother feeding her 3 year old in my local park.

I am from Cambridge but don't live there any more. When I visit it seems to be a haven of breastfeeding and sling using. Unlike round here where you see precious little of either.

Kara - biters!
my DD had always gummed my boob, and when she got teeth, she carried on doing it! sometimes when she pulls off, I have massive dents in my boob where she's clamped down.
(it's hard to unattach her when she's in an odd position - i have to make sure that i put my finger in between her teeth so she doesn't bite down!)

But, i'm sure she takes after me on that, my recorder has got proper dents in it from when I used to hold it with my teeth rather than my lips, so it must just be natural.