3 week old falling asleep after 10 mins on breast or fussing after 15 mins plus havig a growth spurt.. considering giving up, any advice?

[mrswee]

sorry long... but there is a bit of back ground

This is my second baby. With my first baby, breast feeding was hellish. My milk never came in well which took a long time to discover, she never put on much weight and had reflux, was still in newborn clothes at 4 months and alway hungry, I got mastitus which went undiagnosed for 2 months. I still persevered for 5.5 months and did a little mixed feeding. I drove myself to the brink and was very stressed, my doctors begged me to give up in the end but the health visitors always made me feel so guilty. I cried when ever she had a bottle and felt like a failure. It effected our bonding so badly.

Anyway I said to myself this time that I would try but not put myself through that again if there was any problems.
However from the start feeding has gone really well this time, it's been so different and the first week was an absoulte joy of feeding and getting newborn snuggles and getting to know my baby. I feel I missed out the last time as it was all so stressful and my first baby would never settle as she was always still hungry.
Then suddenly on week 3 he is falling asleep after 10 mins on breast or fussing after 15 mins if he doesn't fall asleep plus he seems to be having a growth spurt or is needing fed every 30/40 mins after the last feed.. and taking an hour or more to feed it's all become stressful and I have even called him by his sisters name a few times when he was fussing on the breast as it is bringing back hellish memories.
My husband gave him a bottle this evening for his bed time feed, he settled straight away and I was able to put my oldest to bed. I am stress free tonight for the first time in a week....Now I am considering giving up.... any advice?

Are you completely anti dummy? It sounds like he is using you for comfort between feeds hence why he falls asleep, we started giving a dummy during these times, reserving the boob for food only.

After a horrendous time with your first DC, you've done an amazing job with DC2, well done!

My advice is think carefully before giving up bf entirely. Have you considered mix feeding?

My DC2 is 3 weeks old today and I was, unfortunately, unable to continue after about 9 days, due to massive health complications for me resulting in complete exhaustion and while I will admit that I was instantly relieved of the pressure I was under whilst bf, I miss it terribly. I still think about it often.

I hope you find the right way for you and your DC.

If he falls asleep after 10 minutes feeding, isn't there a chance that he's actually had enough milk?

As for wanting feeding every 40 minutes, that's a bit excessive, perhaps he just wants the contact and reassurance you are there. Could you try getting your partner to pick him up at first and cuddle him for 10 minutes or so and then try offering him your breast? He might fall asleep in the meantime.

I would try speaking to La Leche League. They have a helpline and can give you very useful advice about BFing.

In your shoes I woould talk to them before making any decisions, I expect they will have some helpful advice.

It would be a shame to give up BFing entirely if there are practical things you can do to make it easier, if only you knew about them.

www.laleche.org.uk/

Helpline details

Mix feeding may be a blessing for some. It can relieve the full-on tension, sometimes associated with bf.

Of course, that's just a suggestion and it really helps no-one for someone to say make a decision and stick to it!

OP, talk to your midwife/ health visitor/ continue seeking advice here. It's so hard trying to find your way but you will find the right way for you and your bub.

And your opinion is valid, however mix feeding is also not poisonous and an option for the op to consider.

Sounds like you're doing a marvellous job, and so "brave" after the horrors experienced first time round. Hospital MWs told me that BF babies don't need winding. So colour me surprised when DS turned out to be extremely windy at both ends. A good burp usually clears plenty of belly room for rounds 2 & 3 & sometimes 4.

Just trying to think of other practical stuff... maybe he's falling asleep cos you're making it too toasty/comfy. Not suggesting you freeze your son, but I found that my DS would nod off quickly if we used a pillow as opposed to holding him in my arms (quite manageable when still only little). Also a bit of toe tickling or a gentle finger tickle on the neck soon perked him up. My DS also dozed a bit, still holding some suction but without actually drawing milk, so "teasing" him with the idea that I'd withdraw the nipple would cause him to suck to let me know he was still interested.

Sounds like you're doing a marvellous job, and so "brave" after the horrors experienced first time round. Hospital MWs told me that BF babies don't need winding. So colour me surprised when DS turned out to be extremely windy at both ends. A good burp usually clears plenty of belly room for rounds 2 & 3 & sometimes 4.