How often and for how long does/did your child bf at age 2 and/or age 3?

[AngelDog]

I'd be interested to know any data points please, plus whether your child has any special needs that you know of.

I knew 2.11 y.o. DS1 fed/feeds more often than the average, but I'd like to get a feel for how much more.

I'm trying to piece together a whole lot of clues about his health/development and I suspect that some of the issues he might have could be part of the reason for his feeding patterns.

At age 2 he was feeding 7 or 8 times a day and 1-3 at night. All were reasonbly substantial feeds - when I got pg when he was 24 months, his intake of solids rocketed.

Now at almost 3 he only has 3 feeds a day, but the non-bedtime ones are usually 20-30 mins long which I'm guessing is unusual.

DS is 2.3 and just has a feed first thing in the morning (unless ill or very upset). This has been led by me though, I'm sure he'd feed more if I let him. Length of feed ranges from about 5-30 mins.
No SN or anything that I'm aware of and he's always eaten a lot of solid food.
It's a shame the isn't more research on bf toddlers and childrem

My 2.3yr old feeds morning, once or twice during the day if I am around, on nursery days (3 days a wk) once we get home from nursery. And before bedtime and a comfort suck during the night. Feeds last 5mins or so. Longer for bedtime feed. Eats a normal amount of food.

DS is 2.4 and it totally varies.

He's pretty much night weaned now but always has a BF before bed (unless I'm out and DP is doing bedtime) and one in the morning, either in bed or after breakfast.

I rarely feed him when we are out any more, except at the BF group I run but if we are at home, he will have a feed a couple of times during the day.

ATM he has a bad cough so he did have a nightfeed last night.

Feeds usually last 10-20 minutes now - daytime ones are shorter by DS choice, but the morning/evening ones I usually put a stop to after 20 mins or so.

I stopped feeding my DD when she was 3 years old

She had no night feeds from 6.5 months (except a dream feed)

She was an intense feeder and asked a lot

I work FT so would feed before work and after plus before bed

When I was around she would ask ALL THE TIME!

She fed quickly but a lot

DS is 2.3, he would like to feed 4-5 times in 24 hours, but I keep him down to bedtime (unless DP puts him to bed), when he wakes up, and nap (unless he falls asleep without it), so generally gets 2-3 feeds a day still.

Feeds are generally about 10 mins, and he's got hollow legs when it comes to normal food - he eats an awful lot.

ds3 was 2 last week.

He feeds at bedtime, then another 230574563 times in the night.

Unless we are out and he falls asleep in the pushchair and car, he has 1 feed in the day at nap time.

Thanks everyone. :)

Anyone else care to add their experience?

DS is 2.3 and BFs in the morning for ~15mibs. He drinks a lot of cow's milk during the day though.

Hi Angeldog

I was feeding ds1 on demand until about 3 months ago. He is 2.6 now.

He'd feed during the night, before bed, especially after waking after nap or morning, after nursery. He could get distracted if we were having a busy day, but would happily spend half the evenings on my lap feeding away.

Then I started saying no. He was very upset at first after a nap, but rallied really quickly and hardly noticed there was no bed time feed. We co sleep for most of the night and I'd promised him earlier in the day that we cold have feeds in bed and he was quite determined not to let that go. Gradually though I managed to shift that to only feeding in bed after 6.30 am, and he's dealing with that quite well now. Not sure if it's a coincidence but he has slept through quite often since. He's never done that before.

So now we have one morning feed which lasts for at least an hour! He'll go from one side to another until there's absolutely nothing left, and then for a bit longer. Then sometimes he starts looking for more nipples.

Apart from improving my sleep it does seem to have made us both more creative about spending time together.

Do you think your DS is involved in a bit of sibling rivalry with his long feeds during the day?

oops, that wasn't very clear.
I only started saying no about 2 months ago

I don't think it's sibling issues as such. I suspect he has sensory processing disorder (over-sensitive, to sensory stimulation) and uses bf to help calm himself down. Although he's been great with DS2, he has been much more fraught since DS2 arrived, which I suspect is the reason for the much longer feeds than before.

Funnily enough, he's fed for a shorter time the last two mornings, though he was insistent that his bedtime feed would be for 'a very very very long time.' Of course, he conked out just as fast as normal. :)

DD2 was down to one feed a day by two, after I went on a business trip for a few days that cut down to a few times a week. She only weaned completely (at 2.10) when my milk dried up due to pregnancy.

Ds4 is 2.7 and feeds first thing in the morning and before bed. Bedtime feeds can be very quick or up to half an hour. He asks occasionally in the day but I try to avoid it if he is tired or in the late afternoon as it is a sure fire way for him to drop off to sleep and he is one of those toddlers who won't sleep at night if they sleep in the day. If he is ill or tired he will ask more in the day.

Hi Angel,

To me your DS' feeding pattern sounds very normal. My DD1 is a sensitive soul and sometimes she would stay on the boob for that long (if I let her!) even at 4yo.

I think it's often really hard to know what is normal because how many children are still being demand fed during the day at this age? Even out of the ones that are still BF, so many are in nursery or pre-school so only BF in the morning and at night. I don't think you need to worry about whether the BF pattern is 'normal', just whether or not it works for you :)

Eau, my reason for posting isn't thinking that DS isn't on the normal scale. I'm just collecting a list of hints (to discuss with the GP) that DS has some 'issues'. There are lots of behaviours which on their own are within the range of normal but when put all together (and with one or two less-normal ones) suggest that it's worth investigating whether he has some special needs. Does that make sense?

That's a really good point about how many DC are demand-fed, and how many are with their mothers 24/7. And I think DS1 would be on many, many more feeds a day at this point if it hadn't been for me getting pg with DS2.

It does sound as if DS is nearer the average than I expected though.