Cluster feeding is driving me nuts!!

[pommesdeterreetfromageblanc]

My baby is one week old and I have struggled a bit with bf (pain pain pain and more pain) but with the mw plus a consultant's help we are getting there.

Tonight, she has been on and off the boob for HOURS... just having a few sucks, then falling off..., pretending to go to sleep for 5 min, then more boobs and so on and so forth.

I am going out of my mind and dreading the night.

I meant it to sound about as rude as your post mocking me and accusing me of giving the OP the wrong advice.

A woman comes here in physical pain and miserable because her baby is chewing her nipples off all evening.

A few people tell her there is nothing she can do about it, that newborns always do this in the evening and she just has to put up with it.

I tell her that it may not be inevitable and that I managed to avoid it by getting my babies to sleep when they were tired and my supply was lowest.

And at least 3 people have seen fit to tell me that my experience and my suggestion (to give a bath FFS) are wrong.

It's ridiculous. pommes is so unhappy she's thinking of giving up breastfeeding, but apparently she's only supposed to hear the party line about walnut-sized stomachs and putting up with it and baby knows best.

I think there is a lot of unnecessary martyrdom around breatfeeding that masquerades as support.

Breastfeeding can take a while to get sorted, and it does require a fair but of sitting under the baby at first. But it doesn't necessarily involve cluster feeding in the evening (it's hardly a coincidence that these short feeds seem to happen when supply is lowest. You never hear of cluster feeding at 8am when the gush is full on), feeding every hour at night, never being away from the baby, having to do all the feeds, never using a bottle or soother.

It could be that this baby needs to feed all evening, or it could be that pommes will be able to get her to sleep in the evening and give her bleeding nipples a rest.

pommes - sorry for derailing your thread.

Expressing can be a godsend, but it can mess with your supply and the baby's latch if neither are established.

Best of luck with the MW tomorrow.

Not all babies will take 40 mins per side to feed. I'm not sure any of mine fed for that long in one go once my milk had come in.

You're doing great. DD1 had a bad latch to start with and my nipples were in rag order. It was horrible and so painful. I was expressing and DH was feeding her with a syringe.

But I did get it sorted eventually by asking for advice everywhere I could and trying the stuff that made sense to me.

You'll get there. It's really early days. Keep at it. :)

No - its not your experience that is wrong, its that extrapolating that experience and the implication that the OP can in any way manipulate the behavior of her baby, ergo there is something she is failing to do - i.e. she is failing and thats why her baby is clusterfeeding when in actual fact, for a huge number of women its normal. And you do make ref to pointless feeding etc, Martyrdom - pretty inflammatory and rude, I'd say. Im not the only one who has picked up on your tone and the offence it may have caused. Anyway - I agree that I dont want this to derail the thread. Point made, shall leave it there. Maybe a lesson for the future...

My advice, just go with it OP. Watch box sets, have a glass of vino whilst feeding. If it really all gets too much, give baby to OH for a while, change of scenery for an hour. Stops eventually. Best of luck and congratulations. :)

argh! She now has been feeding for 4 hours, 5 min here and there despite being given a whooping 100ml of expressed milk at 5pm. She has been on and off ever since, my boobs are starting to burn again.... I am seeing a BF MW tomorrow to try and sort out the BF. I am taking it one day or so at a time... tomorrow I am seeing the MW, Monday I will go to a breastfeeding cafe, next Wed a BF session.... after that, I shall decide if I carry on or if I supplement with formula.

Thankfully my boyfriend is a complete star and soooo supportive. I can't really complain.

Thanks all for your comments. It is good to know that people have different coping ways.

I feel your pain, I really do I remember when DC 2 was 5 days old and had been on the boob for 4 hours straight crying my eyes out

Some short term practical suggestions in the short term

1. Can your BF bundle the baby up, take her for a walk in the pram we used to do this if i was desperate, baby would sleep in the pram.

1. Can you feed laid down in bed? So that way you can sleep, at least rest. If not, make sure you ask the midwife to show you tomorrow.

This too shall pass x

how did you get on pommes? did baby have TT in the end?

Pommels, I had the same coping mechanism with ds1, I'd just keep going until I saw the mw, and then until I saw the hv, and then until the next bf group.

In the end I bf him for 7 months (he was a massive lad and I was wasting away!) and ds2 for 12 months. To start with each feed started off agonisingly, but it did settle.

I really hope that you can get to the bottom of the problem.

Xxx

"ergo there is something she is failing to do - i.e. she is failing and thats why her baby is clusterfeeding"

Your grasp of logic is appalling.

"Here's something I tried that worked" does not imply that it will work for everyone or that someone who hasn't tried it is failing.

Giving a baby a bath can make them sleep.

It's hardly some monstrous form of manipulation to try giving a baby a bath when you might like them to sleep.

gem yes TT was dealt with yesterday (I was very lucky the lady did it there and then!)... yesterday afternoon was great, no cluster feeding last night but then last feed last night was not good, she was not latching on very well at all and it hurt. I am losing patience and it is getting me down as i feel it is affecting the bond with my baby a bit.... because i dread the next feed and the pain. Yesterday night we gave her formula in the night, but she still wanted the boob afterwards.

I feel maybe I am trying too many things and I need to get back to basis now her TT has been cut. I will try to go back to boobs only for the weekend till the BF meeting Monday. This morning she fed 30 min on each boob rather than the 40 min on each boob she usually does, so that is progress... not painless yet but my poor boobs are a bit battered.

IwishIwasmoreorganised I keep on having mini deals with my man that we will stick with it till the next meeting, till the next mw appt etc. So far it has got us to almost 2 weeks. After my BF clinic next Wed, we are running out of options if i am still in pain.

I am soooo sick to talk about my boobs!

She did a marathon feed last night! 40 min on each boob, twice, with hardly any break... one of my breast was empty, the other one was too sore to touch... I gave her a bottle of formula, and she guzzled 120ml! Is that normal, she is only 11 days old! It seems an awful lot!
I just can't follow the demand....