anxiety about breastfeeding, one week old

[ThreeWheelsGood]

Hello all. Baby was born one week ago. I stayed on the ward an extra day as baby was slow getting started with breastfeeding - she fed straight after birth then again four hours later but then it was hours later before we both woke up and midwives were concerned at get lack of interest in feeding. I expressed colostrum for a few syringe feeds, then after a few actual feeds was able to go home on Thursday night. Thought it was going well but when my milk came in/breasts got engorged on Friday, baby had trouble latching on and we had a horrible day where she fed once with hands-on help of community midwife, then couldn't get her to feed (she was crying or sleeping) for hours, eventually ward midwives suggested we come back in for help at midnight (lifesavers!) where we got hands-on help again to feed.

Since then I've been successfully feeding on demand, sometimes every 2 hours. I'm exhausted and anxious things will go wrong again. Can anyone reassure me this feeling will lessen? I'm so aware that she is 100% reliant on me for nutrition and i'm scared I'll fail her again...

Firstly you are not failing her. In fact by asking for help you are making sure you are doing your best for her.

Bf isn't easy for everyone. I panicked to begin with that I wouldn't get any milk but DS is 14 weeks now and all those initial hiccups and worries have gone.

Keep asking for help if you want it and try to relax. :)

Agree with all, you haven't failed your dd at all, in fact you've been brilliant. You needed help and you asked for it, which is exactly what you should have done[hsmile]

Feeding every 2 hours and sometimes more is perfectly normal too. Have you both worked out how to feed lying down yet as that might help you get some more rest.

I too think that the feeling will lessen soon. You've had a few good days after a worrying start but try to think about how well you are both doing now. Every time you change a dirty nappy you know you've done the good work of getting the milk in the top end so that it can come out of the other end [hsmile]

Try googling kellymom feeding your newborn what to expect, as this might reassure you too.

Hi, congratulations! You are in no way failing your baby, you are doing amazing for continuing to breast feed despite the difficult start. so many people would have given up!

I wish someone could have told me in my early days of b/f not to worry as much as i did. Im sure we all worry if we've got enough milk. if we are doing it right i think this just comes with being a mum!

sounds like feeding is going really well now, youre feeding on demand regularly. sounds like youve had good support from midwives too which is great. are there any breastfeeding groups in your area? may be worth going along to meet other breast feeding mums as it really gets your confidence up and pick other mums brains about things.

if you do get engorged again (quite easy in the first 6 weeks) express a little by hand or pump if you have one or have a warm shower just to get them a little softer for baby to latch on easier.

Well done you for persevering!!

Thank you for the replies.i'm trying to take each day as it comes, I think the tiredness is making new feel more emotional/heightening my anxiety. Every feed is one more success I guess!

Every feed is one more success and you sound like you are doing really well. Sleep deprivation is hard but try to be kind to yourself, sod the housework and accept all offers of help.

Treat yourself to takeaways and a cleaner if finances allow and do your shopping online. Get yourself some drinks and snacks and take yourself and dd off to bed for a couple of days for a babymoon will help with the bfing and your tiredness[hsmile]

Really recommend going along to a bfing support group too. You usually get a cuppa, some adult conversation and you get to meet local bfing mums. The nct also run local social groups where everyone is welcome so they are worth checking out too.

Your milk coming in can produce a huge surge of hormones and tearfulness as well.

How are you getting on now three?

I'm shattered and still quite anxious - my right breast/nipple are really painful, I seem to have her latching on slightly wrong there. Got some tips and making slow recovery I think. Wish I could get more sleep!

Sorry to hear about the soreness but glad you are getting some help. Have the MWs helped you with your latch? Have they observed a whole feed? Kellymom has some information on positioning and sore nipples here. These latching videos might be useful too.

As for the sleep, it will come and research shows that by 7 months you will actually be getting more sleep than your ffing peers. Waking frequently for feeds is totally normal at this age though, have a look here.

The thing that might help you get more sleep is sticking her in bed with you, have you tired that?

Thank you so much for the resources, having a good read now. We've tried co-sleeping a couple of times but it's not optimal, I don't sleep terribly well doing it.