Sorry, this will be long!
I have been lurking on this thread for a while, reading everyone's journeys of feeding with deep admiration. It has been so inspiring to read the different stories.
I have name changed just for this, although probably who I am is solvable!
There have been some posts recently along these lines, all of which have helped me immensely, but I just thought I would see if anyone had any ideas of what I should be doing.
My DS was born 2 months premature. I was really ill just after his birth, and did not start trying to express for several days- and when I could eventually, it was a bit hit and miss, and certainly not the recommended 8 times in 24 hours. I did finally manage to express enough to fulfil DS's needs (given through a nasal feeding tube), but I never achieved full lactation. Still, I was determined to bf, so I persevered. When DS was 34 weeks old, I was finally "allowed" to try bfing him. His breathe/suck/swallow coordination was nonexistent, and he fell asleep at the breast more often than not - even the NNU staff could not rouse him. I was told that he was still young, and to give it time and patience. Then, three days later, I was suddenly told that I should room in from the next day so as to establish demand feeding ready for discharge. Slightly shell shocked, I did so. It was a disaster. DS cried with frustration and hunger for most of the night, and after one particularly traumatise 2 1/2 hour session I demanded a top up. As he had pulled out his feeding tube for the umpteenth time, I was told that the only way to do this was by bottle. I fed by breast and bottle for the next 24 hours. He put on weight and so was discharged. The discharge sheet said that demand bfing had been successfully established.
At home we continued this feeding pattern. We try a bf, although he does not seem to take much, despite being watched by at least 20 different people in the hospital, plus a lactation consultant here at home. I then give a bottle top up and then pump. I eventually tried exclusive bfing, but he put on so little weight that the HV suggested a bottle of formula every night. Unfortunately this tipped my supply, already on a knife-edge, into crisis. This was two weeks ago and I have struggled ever since with both getting DS to bf, and with my supply. I am currently on domperidone (thank you monkeypuzzletree for the recommendation) which is helping greatly, although i'm still nowhere near enough. I also pump regularly, drink loads, and take fenugreek. DS bfs 2-3 times a day, although rarely seems to take enough to be satisfied without a top up. This is now either breast milk or formula.
So I have two questions. First, am I missing something obvious I should be doing? And second, how do I time pumping, when I feel I should be trying him at the breast as well, plus having to bottle feed? It is also made even more complicated by the fact that he hates to be put down, so often cries while I pump.
I am really quite angry at the amount of bad/conflicting advice I have been given right from the beginning (haven't even scratched the surface here!). Any thoughts or ideas would be welcomed with gratitude.