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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Surely 53weeks is too young to self wean?

44 replies

nannyl · 23/09/2012 20:23

Am really upset...

I have just put DD to bed without any milk..... (she was 1 last week)

She just wouldnt even get her mouth anywhere near my nipple and did not want milk.

I cant quite believe it..... she cut her top 2 teeth 9 days ago, (and has been biting me since), yesturday was normal-ish (though she had a cry before having her before bed breast feed)

she was unusually up at 3am this morning wanting a BF (I didnt give her any, and tried settling her with water / cuddles etc for 2 hours, before at 5am i gave in, and she gulped down 2 boobs (as normal)
she then over slept so for the 2nd time ever, I didnt offer her a BF upon waking and went straight to breakfast instead.

she (for the 1st time ever) refused milk after her nap today... (bit me hard twice, so then didnt get any, but didnt seem to want any either)... so she had a bigger tea than usual .... then point blank refused bed time milk too.

Are my breastfeeding days over already

I had always intended for her to self wean, and hoped it wouldnt happen until much nearer 3 years, and i cant get over that yesturday she had her normal 3 feeds, and today..... nothing.

I am now desperate for her to wake tonight (mad i know) but i cant quite believe that my breastfeeding time could be over so suddenly and im certainly not ready for her to self wean, even if she is

OP posts:

ShowOfHands · 23/09/2012 22:16

Both dd and ds were/are fussy when I was/am ovulating. They would/will clamp down occasionally and refuse feeds. It happened every time I ovulate.

This might be possible if you've had your periods come back recently. Same often happens when you're newly pregnant. DS is quite fussy during my periods too. I think the milk must flow slower or taste different. He always demands milk as vociferously as usual a couple of days later.

I have also found that both dc refused feeds when teething. They wanted to BITE and they both knew that was something you did with food, not with my breast, so solids intake upped during feeding.

Northernlurkerisbackatwork · 23/09/2012 22:21

DD1 did self wean at just under a year. She had wound down her feeds for some time and was just having a morning feed. Then she wouldn't latch on and showed no interest ever again. Dd3 on the other hand was completelky different and fed until she was over two very happily.

Original poster

nannyl · 23/09/2012 22:21

thanks mawbroon.... have never even herd of that but will have a look when she is awake

show of hands, that sounds promising / possible..... i think i am about to ovulate for the first time, so could be... and she is teething too!

OP posts:

HuwEdwards · 23/09/2012 22:31

Nannyl, remember, it's called self weaning because it's the babies decision. Sorry love, but it's not about you

beancurd · 23/09/2012 22:43

Nursing strikes sudden enough to make you feel unsettled are rarely the end of bf. If you keep relaxed and offer without pressure it will prob resolve suddenly.

On the issue of forcing the baby to the breast I don't think you can, in fact the very opposite. I would say that maternal pressure is much more likely to make a nursing strike an end of bf. Much younger babies will reuse the breast if wrestled with, happens with more finality with an older child.

You continue offering, if you want to, as a strike is akin to reduced solid or fluid intake whilst unwell. The reason for the strike is most commonly teething or other oral discomfort and when it resolves so does the strike.

Other reasons a strike does become final include nursing patterns that have been reduced or scheduled infrequently, pregnancy as pps mention, oral thrush, babies with undiagnosed allergies. The odd baby my self wean naturally but it isn't common.

Rubirosa · 23/09/2012 22:47

Ladybird, many mothers would prefer to give their baby the best milk rather than a substitute, so although a stopping breastfeeding might not mean no milk, it might mean inferior milk. Lots of children would happily never eat a vegetable again but parents still try to persuade them to because it is good for them.

MigGril · 24/09/2012 09:37

just because culter changes don't mean that there still isn't a biological need for breastmilk.

We do many things inn the west that encourage early weaning. scheduling feeds and babies being separated from there mothers to name but two. If you continue to feed on demand then most toddlers will still be breastfeeding well into there seconded year. This is biologically normal and even though we are lucky to has access to adequate nutrition in this country breastfeeding is way more then just nutrition. recent studies have shown that you are still spring your Childs immune system. we still don't full understand the mancanics but children who are breastfeed for longer have larger lyfen glands. even with modern medicine this still has long term effects on health. again we don't fully understand a lot of this, but just because our society has changed doesn't mean our biology has we are still very much the humans we where before the modern world took over.

Original poster

nannyl · 24/09/2012 13:23

not looking good

she woke at 5am (sounded like she had a sore throat).... went hysterical at the idea of BFing, cried Dad-dad and needed daddy to settle her

upon waking she did not want to know either, and was hysterical at coming near me (although she did touch my top once, which used to mean BM please, and she got her mouth close enough to bite each nipple once too)

we have now gone 30 hours without

and i expressed 5oz this am, which i will give her instead of cow milk at tea time.

OP posts:

beancurd · 24/09/2012 14:31

If she is sore then it would usually take a while before bring interested again...can be a week or so then suddenly they latch like they never stopped. Hope it soon resolves for you both.

RedKites · 24/09/2012 14:55

Is it possible her ears are sore? That could make it uncomfortable to feed. Your GP would be able to check if it is a possibility.

Be gentle on yourself and hang on in there if you want to - I've certainly read on here of older babies who haven't fed for a week or two, and then returned to bfing.

RedKites · 24/09/2012 15:11

This is quite an old thread, but there are lots of tips in it - there might be an idea which is useful to you, but hopefully can also encourage you if you want to keep trying.

Honsandrevels · 24/09/2012 15:31

My dd2 did this :(

She had a brief nursing strike at about 10 months and then gave up at 12 months. We were having trouble since her top teeth came in, it was as though she couldn't work out how to feed with them in. She was 7 weeks early and wasn't 12 months corrected.

I was very upset and tried everything suggested on here and kellymom. I expressed for ages. She'd watch me hand express and then drink my milk. Reading that babies never selfwean at this age made me feel rubbish. That somehow it was my fault!

In the end I had to let it go and be thankful we managed it at all. We had a struggle with her being prem.

Hopefully your dd will restart but if not be proud of yourself for feeding for a year.

Honsandrevels · 24/09/2012 15:32

My dd2 did this :(

In the end I had to let it go and be thankful we managed it at all. We had a struggle with her being prem.

Hopefully your dd will restart but if not be proud of yourself for feeding for a year.

feekerry · 24/09/2012 19:54

nursing strikes can occur at any age, from quite early on too i.e 4 months. so should we take this as a sign of self weaning..... god i hope not.....

Original poster

nannyl · 25/09/2012 08:52

we are now 54 hours in.... and she is not giving in

we have had a lovely bath, and tried to feed / cuddle after. This was the only time she wasnt hysterical about being near me.

she went 5.30pm - 8am with nothing passing her lips.

(I tried feeding her in her sleep, but she even resisted then

this morning i could only express 2oz.... I have enough BM for her tea time cup of milk to be BM but i feel this will be the last BM that she ever drinks

OP posts:

Honsandrevels · 25/09/2012 10:59

Oh dear, I'm sorry to hear that. Keep expressing for now. I expressed for about 10 days I think and kept offering for longer. As I said, my dd never restarted but there are lots of lovely stories about babies that do.

AngelDog · 25/09/2012 19:50

Have you had her checked by a GP?

My DS went on a partial strike at 13 months (he would still feed to sleep, but not at any time). He seemed healthy & happy, but it turned out he had an ear infection and chest infection then went on to get a V&D bug and conjunctivitis too (all at once).

The strike lasted 12 days, and I think it was the antibiotics which finally sorted it out.

Lots of nursing strikes are resolved in the end, though sadly it's not always possible.

Original poster

nannyl · 25/09/2012 20:20

I havent had her checked, no... perhaps i should

we are now 63 hours in... she has not allowed her mouth anywhere near my breast.

Your poor DS having all that at once

She has refused to feed to sleep and also refused while sleeping and i tried.... even in her sleep she refused and made her head go the opposite way

OP posts:

AngelDog · 25/09/2012 21:02

Just one other thing I thought of - I was a bit worried about my supply and it definitely dipped a lot. I didn't really manage to express much at all during the strike.

When DS started feeding again, he had a few days of loooooong feeds, which I presume was him getting my supply back up again, then his feeding returned to its normal pattern. So if you're worried about supply, it may not be too much of an issue if you manage to resolve the strike.

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