Some Advice Needed Re:BF Please.

[woopsidaisy]

Hi.
I had DS3 nearly a month ago, and whilst I expressed for DS1 and BF DS2 that was a while ago, and I seem to have forgotten everything!
So I was hoping someone might be able to answer a few questions for me...

DS3 goes to bed at around 9pm. I feed him until he settles-about half nine. He sleeps until just before 12mn. Then feeds again and goes back to sleep until 2am. But from then on he is waking every hour (ish), wanting on to the boob-then feeds for a minute and falls asleep! HV suggested a bottle of formula either at 9 or 12. We have tried this but he is still waking. Should I get strict and not give him the breast all the time? Or just keep going until he grows out of it?
My boobs get quite full overnight as he isn't taking the milk-so I have to get up and express!
Any suggestions or experience of this?

Also, he never seems to 'like" my left breast. I know that they favour one more, and have tried different holds on left side. But sometimes I have to abandon left side altogether as he simply won't latch on and stay on!

I am feeding on demand, will he automatically settle in to more of a routine during the day? Should I be trying to "stretch him out" during the day as well as the night?

Hope that all makes sense, sorry for length!
Thanks!

Perhaps should have said that he is quite big-nearly 13 lbs at under four weeks. Not sure if that makes a difference.

I am by no means an expert, infact far from it, I am just about struggling through each day but ds is 9 weeks tomorrow and he was very much like your ds, would wake at least every 2 hours through the night sometimes less, for the last week or two though he has been going down about 7-8 (i give him a good feed and put him down awake) he then sleeps untill 4ish and gets up for the day at 7. he even slept right through one night.

basically i guess i am saying try and ride it out a bit longer, hopefully things will change soon. I feed ds pretty much 2 hourly during the day so i guess he is stocking up.

Will try to address some of your questions but sorry if I miss some.

I wouldn't with hold the feeds at night, there is no point. He want milk and the comfort of you and if you don't give it he will get distressed and not understand why you won't feed him.

It is hard at first, but just try to feed him when he wants it. Have you thought about sticking him in bed with you so that you can get more rest?

If you want to continue bfing I'd ditch the formula as gving formula, especially at night can interfere with your supply and there is no evidence that giving formula helps babies sleep better. See Will Giving Formula or Solids Help My Baby Sleep Better?.

As for your boobs being full, I would only express if you really need to and then only take enough to ease your discomfort. If you keep on expressing your body will keep making more milk as it will think the baby is drinking it all.

If you do feed on demand then the nights will get better and the days will automatically fall into more of a routine. Having said that, one of the joys of bfing is that you don't need a strict routine. If you decide to go out fo the day you can just pack some nappies and you are off . i had a look at GF when DS was around 3 months and he'd more or less fallen into a similar routine but without any fuss or stressing.

As for your left freast, this is quite common. Have you tried the rugby hold? Is there a Bfing Support Group you could go to that might help you with this. It might help to go along and just meet some other bfing mums to for some mutual support.

As for the rest, I think you are doing brilliantly! He wants feeding, you feed him and that is all you need to do .

Don't know if you've read Breastfeeding your Newborn, what to expect in the early weeks but it might help you see that what is gong on is all perfectly normal .

Thank you for the replies.
OK, I will continue to go with the milk flow,! It is reassuring to see that the "stretching out" appears to occur anyway. My real concern was that he is waking at night, but only feeding for a minute or so,i.e., just for comfort? Should I just let him keep doing this?
I do find expressing some milk is handy, as I only feed him when out and about if I feel it is not going to be frowned upon. I'm a coward,I know! So having a back up bottle is ideal.
I do pop him into bed with me from about 3ish onwards-I want him to be used to settling himself and sleeping in his own basket too.

Will check out the links,thanks!

It may be for comfort, but how can you tell? Bfing is about so much more than just giving milk. If he needs you and wants a feed, why deny him? He will learn that you are always there for hm and that's a great lesson for him .

If you are worried about feeding out in public, I've done it and never, ever been challanged ro even had disapproving looks. There are many bfing friendly places like McDonalds or your local library but it is your right to feed your baby when it's hungry. If you want to build up your confidence, go along to your local bfing support group or NCT group and feed there. You'll be surrounded by women who won't even probably notice .

One thing I didn't answer was your queries about LOs size. Your body has done an amazing job getting him to that size and is producing enough milk for you to express a bottle. Why would you think there was anything wrong with that? . If you baby is hungry, just feed them .

Thought you might also is it possible to exclusively bf a big baby? .

I think HVs often just recommend formula because they want to say something that sounds like they know what they're talking about.

Zule I think you could be right, but the evidence certainly isn't on her side with that one is it?

woop thought you might like 31 ways to get your baby asleep and stay asleep. There is probably very little that will help at the moment, he is so tiny still but some of the tips will help to lay down good sleep routines for the future .

Try getting him into the daylight as soon as you can in the morning and again later in the day. The sunlight will help him to understand the difference between day and night and may even help him sleep .

You're not alone either, have a look at this thread .

Hey, lots of good advice already, just wanted to say that my DD was waking every hour or so during the night for feeds for the first few weeks. If she fell asleep I found taking a few deep breaths in and out would usually get her feeding again unless she was properly asleep. Also changing nappy between sides (though not every hour!) got her feeding better on the second side, and sometimes offering the first side again before putting her back down. Anyway by about 5-6 weeks started sleeping for much longer stretches, and now at 12 weeks only wakes once or twice for a quick feed hope I haven't jinxed tonight now. I definitely wouldn't give any formula, just keep feeding him on demand as you are and it WILL get better. He's still a tiny newborn now after all.