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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Feeding constantly, won't sleep during day unless with me......

11 replies

samie10 · 08/09/2012 12:24

My baby is 18 days old. Days 1-14 perfect - slept and ate, would go to anyone, loved the car-seat, we were able to go out and about. since then she will not stop crying until fed to sleep, feeding pretty much constantly and if i leave her when i think she is sleeping and she wakes she will not settle with anyone but me, where the whole feeding to sleep process starts over. What are we doing wrong? I can't even go to the toilet without her crying and waking. This is only during the day, when we go to bed at night she will feed to sleep at around midnight. She has also developed a hatred for the car-seat in the last few days and we can't go out....please help!

OP posts:
tiktok · 08/09/2012 13:05

You are doing nothing wrong - except wondering if you are doing something wrong :)

Your baby is normal.

She will get through this stage as she grows - maybe even in a few days. She is learning that you (your voice, your smell, your touch, your milk, your presence - all familiar to her, in varying ways, because less than 3 weeks ago she was inside you) are essential to her well-being and sense of security. She may not have realised this quite so acutely in the first 2 weeks, and now she does...and the only way she can communicate her needs to you ('cos she is a baby and cannot talk, or text or send an email in advance :) ) is to show you by her behaviour she is not happy.

Meeting those needs relaxedly and acceptingly, and not continuing to try to put her down, is important for her emotional well-being, and when you meet her needs you grow confidence and trust between you...and she becomes less 'needy', at least in those ways, as time goes on.

Does this help? reading a book like 'Babymoon' will expand a bit on the baby development thing, and help explain more :)

Cheekychops84 · 08/09/2012 14:50

Hello my 5 week old is exactly the same! Screams in the car seat even when the car is moving and screams in the pushchair. It's really getting me down I feel like a prisoner and dread going out. And she us really loud. I end up carrying her and pushing an empty pushchair. Now ppl are saying I'm making it worse by carrying her but when she is screaming so much that she is coughing and sweating I can't leave her. Sorry I'm no help just wanted you to know I'm going therough the same hope someone has some advise later .

needsadviceplease · 08/09/2012 16:29

Giving such a tiny baby what she wants or needs (same thing at this age) is never 'making it worse'. It passes. A good sling can be a wonderful thing. Hang in there x

Original poster
samie10 · 08/09/2012 17:04

Thanks everyone for the messages!
Cheekychops84 - Im with you, its just the worst feeling in the world. It will get better, it HAS to!!! You will be ok!!XX
My MW has just been to visit, she weighed my baby and we have found she is not putting on as much weight as desired. I have just expressed my first bottle and given her a mix Bf/Formula feed. For the first evening (Im in Dubai) in days she is happy and quiet and the relief is unbelievable. Im going to continue with BF but she is so much happier. Tomorrow will be a new day and we have to go out but i hope it will be a little easier as she is happier....

OP posts:
jkklpu · 08/09/2012 17:10

samie10 - Others will come on to say that it's possible to set too much store by weight gain. If you're baby is normally content, feeding well and producing plenty of wet and soiled nappies, don't worry too much about the weight charts. If you start giving formula now, it will affect your own milk supply, which may then lead to you wanting to ff more. If you want to carry on bf-ing, stay close to your baby and feed her whenever she wants to, probably without the faff of expressing.

tiktok · 08/09/2012 17:15

samie, can you share more details about the weight gain?

Formula is so very rarely the only option in cases like this - did your midwife discuss other choices?

Original poster
samie10 · 08/09/2012 18:47

Im going to continue to BF and express, if i can't express enough for a feed I will top up with formula. The objective is not stop BF. The difference in my baby this evening is unreal. She drank the bottle, slept, woke and we have had playtime, she has had a breast feed and is back to sleep - no crying for the first time in days. Tomorrow I will continue to BF and if i can't express enough again for a whole bottle which she will get around 7pm, I will top up.
She has gained just above her birthweight after 19 days, she has been so distressed over the last few days it has just been awful......

OP posts:
mummysmellsofsick · 08/09/2012 21:44

Completely normal!

MigGril · 09/09/2012 08:16

Do you have a local breastfeeding cafe? As ticktock says topping up with formula it's not the only option.

And if you want to carry on breastfeeding topping up can have a negative effect on your milk supply. Having your latch checked by some one with more experienced then your midwife, could be ask that's needed. They can also give you other stragies to increase her milk intake.

aufaniae · 09/09/2012 08:20

If you top up with formula it may make BFing harder as it can affect your supply.

aufaniae · 09/09/2012 08:24

cross posts!

kellymom.com is a great source of advice about BFing.

Here's the section on weight gain and BFing.

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