4 month sleep regression madness!

[Byrnsie30]

Hi,

I have an 18 week old DS. He was 3 weeks early. When we first brought him home we weren't supposed to let him go longer than 2.5-3 hours between feeds. Needless to say he's never slept very well!

However, we recently moved him into his cot in his own room (he's a long baby and was just getting too big for the basket - a lovely, down-to-earth health visitor advised us to move him ) His sleep began to improve and we were getting a pattern of about 4-5 hours, feed, 3 hours, feed, 3 hours. We were delighted with the improvement as before he would do 2-3 hours max between feeds.

However, about 2 weeks ago it all went wrong! He was waking more and more, feeding more and more. He became clingy, and despite always having done a combination of breast and formula bottle without problems, he only wanted the breast for a good few days! The worst night we've had he was stirring and needing settled every 45 mins! For about a week he managed a maximum of 1.5 hours before needing either fed or settled!

After over a week of this we tried him back in his basket (but in his own room) and even started to swaddle him again (these both seem to have helped) He seems to be coming out the otherside of it now, but it's still not great!

Me and DH don't really feel comfortable with letting him Cry It Out (CIO) or Controlled Crying (CC), at least not while he's this young. We have friends who have done this and their baby has always slept well, and we have friends who have done nothing and have babies who sleep well - so I do think it depends on the baby!

We got 2-3 stints of 2.5-3 hours last night. At least twice a week I feel like it's our fault that our DS isn't sleeping, but I remind myself that we are sticking to his routine as closely as possible and that this is a stage lots of babies (and parents!) go through.

He is currently napping in a jungle swing thing in the living room (I'm sure Gina Ford would love that!!!)

Would love to hear other peoples stories xx

No useful advice, but you are not alone!

DS is 19w, never been much of a sleeper really. Had settled into predictable 2hr waking. Two weeks ago it became hourly. A week ago it became half-hourly. Then last night, he did 5 hours!!! He's only done that twice before in his life. I'd be happy if he just went back to 2hrly frankly but just wanted to illustrate that the only constant is change!

I co-sleep, so dozing back to sleep once he's latched on is how I cope really. Know its not for everyone though. I also suspct he wakes more often/wakes properly for a feed instead of just stirring in his sleep because he can sense me there - I'm cool with that, but again I get that its not everyone's bag.

Hope your nights are better soon - sleep deprivation is, literally, torture!

Oh, and I really, really think its entirely random, baby sleep. Varies from baby to baby and night to night. Not your fault AT ALL.

My DS did this for about 6 weeks when he was 4 months old; he'd sleep for maybe 45 minutes then wake up, at one point for at least an hour if not longer, then eventually fall asleep at 5am for a couple of hours. I coped with it by napping in the day when he slept, and chocolate! Just keep doing what you're doing, your DS will come through it. Mine just decided to sleep right through one night, then it turned into 2-3 nights a week, then it was all the time. He's 13 months now and rarely wakes in the night.

Thanks for the support ladies :-) It sometimes feels as though everyone elses baby just got themselves into a 12 hour sleep routine as soon as the cord was cut!!

Do either of you have any advice how to encourage a daytime nap in the cot? At the moment DS will only nap in pram/car seat or swing thing! x

Bumping in the hope someone else can advise - my ds naps only in the sling or on the boob! We are on the sofa together now, he's feeding in his sleep while I watch crap tv - welcome to the house of bad habits.

Had a better night last night. Me and DH stuck to our guns. kept putting DS down in cot as soon as he was calm, only picking up if upset. Didn't rock him to sleep or resort to swaddling or baskek. He managed to put himself over a few times, with us just shushing him. We are still far from a full nights sleep, and at one point we were up for over an hour settling him (as we were determined to not let him fall asleep on us!) - but we feel better for having stuck to our guns!
As far as naps are concerned, I think I need to invest in a good balckout blind if I'm to get him to sleep in his cot during the day!
Was just BFing him to sleep and the bloody gas man turned up to ruin that! x

I had this with ds. Bang on 16 weeks he went from a pretty good sleeper to waking continually to be fed. It lasted 6-8 weeks.

I don't know if it stopped of it's own account, but we did several things which may have assisted.
We introduced a comforter at night (he is 2 now and still loves it).
Introduced formula
Introduced solids early (at 19 weeks).

When he was on solids and formula he slept right through and has done since.

Good luck with this- it was an utter nightmare for me but I got through it.

It's one of the reasons I am putting ds2 onto formula early this time.

x

oh and I also seem to remember that things improved when his day time napping improved adn he could settle himself (I gave him to my mum and she was harsher than me and let him cry for 10-15 minutes). Didn't take long and he was napping well.

Umm...not sure solids or crying are the solution here In fact introducing solids can lead to more disturbed sleep as their immature digestive system struggles with food it's not ready for.

It's a pain but it's just developmental. You have my sympathy, DS just went through this and I was at my wits end thinking he would never sleep again and I was doing something wrong.

Lasted four weeks and he then he reverted to a new normal & can do loads of cool stuff like roll around all over the place, play with toys and this weeks most exciting development - sleep through the night!!!

Sounds like you're doing all the right things. Hang in there & be consistent. When all else failed I reverted to feeding to sleep, buggy for naps etc. It was all only temporary, he's gone back to self settling again now at 22 weeks

We're also at this stage. My DS has just turned 4 months and gone from sleeping from 10:30-5/6 to waking at 2ish again. One theory is that at this age they're starting to become interested in the world around them so easily distracted while on the boob. I've just switched a morning bf to a ff to add to the dream ff that he already has. I'm not recommending you do anything differently but just sympathizing.

It's so frustrating and tiring when you feel like you're regressing. Particularly in the sleep department.

Please try not to worry that you're doing anything wrong. My DD was always a bad sleeper but the regression in our house was hell. DP and I still shudder at the memory. We are first timers and were so upset that we had failed and caused all these bad habits...but it really is developmental. He will come through it. Lasted about seven hideous weeks here.

A comforter will help, if you're breastfeeding. Solids rarely help at all. I found that all of the dream routine babies who didn't go through the regression hit rocky sleep later, around 6 months, or sometimes later again. Teething. Few people really get away Scot free when it comes to sleepless nights. But I do know how scary it feels when they're at this age and you're frantically trying to get them to sleep and all around you babies are going through the night.

It will pass.

This is why I love MN! In RL people tell you not to go mad reading stuff on the Internet, will only make you worry more etc etc. If it wasn't for this site I probably wouldn't know about 4 month sleep regression ( though have to say its more 13 week sleep regression in my case!). I would just think I was doing something (else) wrong or that it's my 'fault' for breast feeding as some family and friends seem to imply! I'm a bit disturbed to learn it can last 6 weeks+ though!
DS does have some better nights, he can and does sometimes self settle, he's healthy and trackIng his centile perfectly and every day it seems he can do more cool new stuff. That's what I'm trying to focus on to help me stay positive. That and the fact that it's not really natural for them to sleep through the night yet!

I've come to join in! DS is 17 weeks tomorrow. Since birth he has been a pretty good sleeper, with a few exceptions only waking once for a feed in the middle of the night then going to sleep again until breakfast time. He'd even done a handful of 'through the night' stints (mid August).

For the past three weeks however he's been waking more and more, and staying awake for long periods in the night. He has also just started teething which is adding to the problems. Last night he went to bed and to sleep at 8:30pm, which is his usual bedtime. He's pretty good at settling himself off to sleep at this time. He then woke at 11:30 and stayed awake until 3:30am, sometimes screaming and upset, sometimes feeding, sometimes settled but wide awake in his basket. He then woke again at 5:30 and was up at 7:30. During his more frequent night feeds (EBF) he does seem hungry but is in general satisfied by the food he's getting.

The problem is, he's never been one to nap, right from the off. He will fall asleep in the car, and sometimes in the pushchair when out and about, but not reliably. So it's a real struggle to get him to sleep in the day. When he does have a couple of good daytime naps he's a different baby. If he doesn't, he's incredibly irritable.

Basically just looking to share advice and experiences!

DS is 20wo and [whispers] it's getting better! He was a 2hrly waker before, then he hit 4m and we had two weeks of hourly waking, a week of half-hourly (ugh), a mixed week of half-hours and longer stretches but the last 3 nights have been consistently 3hrly... Eek...

Marking my place as my 3 1/2 month old has started feeding more at night, which I cope with by spending part of the night co-sleeping. I think this is probably normal but DH thinks we lack discipline and should get DS to sleep in his cot.....
Watching this thread with interest!

So I thought DS was seeming more hungry - got him weighed this morning and he has gained a pound in the last two weeks, moving up from the 25th to 50th centile!

Last night: bed and settled to sleep within five minutes at 8:30, woke at 10:30 screaming and rubbing at face/mouth. Cuddles, teething gel, etc, a decent feed, back down at 11:15pm then he slept until 6am thankfully. Previous night he woke every couple of hours after midnight.