how do you know when your LO doesn't want the other side?

[smk84]

hi, have always offered both sides to my 11.5 week old, and he has always readily accepted. i am starting to wonder if he wants the second side though. Especially in the mornings and afternoons. He is very content after the first side (not very content when on, but that's a differenmt story!), and sometimes when I offer the other he will latch on, but not really do much sucking and seems to let go (mouth goes tiny) but not take himself right off. So just now I took him off and he did a little cry, burped, sat him in bouncy chair and he is there smiling away. Just wondering what your experiences are, and if I can expect him to change his behaviour as he gets older (e.g. perhaps only wanting one side). Thank you ;)

Sometimes they want a big meal, sometimes just a drink or a little snack :) If you are offering and he doesn't always want it then that's fine- there are no hard and fast rules really. If he seems healthy and alert and is gaining weight OK then just carry on as you are.

As he gets older and you get more experienced then follow his cues will become second nature.

thanks eau, just wish he could tell me (and that there was a little window to his tummy to see how full he was !!)

Just bumping for ideas please

I wouldn't worry too much - let him pop himself off on the first side and then offer the second. If he's not bothered then he doesn't want it. You don't have to give both sides every feed (in fact I never did).

I always offer dd both sides (now 5 months) and she never takes it and only feeds 5 mins. Its hard but you have to trust your baby to take what that need. If they are still hungry you will definitely know about it!

My DD is the same age. Usually I offer both sides, on the occasions when she looks full/has had a massive feed/has fallen asleep I sometimes don't bother...but she usually shows signs of wanting it within about ten minutes. Think she feeds better on the second side if she's had a change or a break anyway. If she doesn't want it I definitely get to know about it, but I think it's worth offering.

Thank you everyone

I was worried about this, but DS is making it much clearer now (11 weeks). He just refuses or makes a sad face (cute and funny) if I try to put him on the other side when he doesn't want it. If he does, he kind of lurches over to that side. He also shows when he wants to stop feeding with the shield on left side but still wants the nipple on that side. I can't think how he does that. I'll pay more attention next feed! He's sometimes having 3 or 4 sides per feed so I'm glad I understand him (for now!).

A window in the tum wouldn't help though :) 'Being full' wouldn't necessarily mean 'I want to stop bf' as babies may want to continue for comfort and contact; ' being half full' wouldn't necessarily mean 'I want to continue feeding' as this might be all the baby wants at the moment :)

Communication between mothers and babies grows, and there may be mistakes made along the way - but generally, behaviour and demeanor, facial expression, gestures....those are the 'clues', and not the clock, not frequency of feeding, not books, and not other people's opinions!

That's great belinda :)
Tiktok you give me a very logical way to look at it.