Co-sleeping & bf'ing toddler & newborn

[AngelDog]

I'm planning on it. DS will be nearly 3 when DC2 arrives.

I know the baby isn't supposed to sleep next to the toddler, but how do you manage to alternate sides when feeding? I'm guessing I may not be that good at staying awake when I'm feeding the baby on the same side as DS is sleeping.

I can feed from the top breast, but does it take a while before the baby is able to do that? I only started co-sleeping with DS when he was 4 months, so I'd never tried with him before that.

Our co-sleeping arrangement is 2 single mattresses on the floor. DS has one and DC2 and I will share the other.

I will be watching this thread with interest, as I am in much the same position. I'm 6 months pregnant, and DS is 3 years old. We have 'decorated' his bedroom with new sheets and a bookshelf etc. but he shows no sign of wanting to actually sleep in it. I haven't insisted, as I don't want to push him out of our bed just because of the baby.

I know that some women are able to feed from both sides without shuffling around in the middle of the night, but it sounds uncomfortable and complicated to me...

I cosleep with two 1 year olds and sleep with one on each side of me in a kingsize bed, with DH in a single pushed up against the kingsize.

I've never really mastered feeding from the top boob, so if I want to feed from the other side I put my head at the bottom of the bed and take the baby down there with me. It means the other baby/toddler is sleeping next to your feet for a bit, but IME you are so aware of where everybody is in the bed that you don't kick anybody!

So, I'd have toddler in one of your singles and you and the baby in the other, then just switch ends of the bed to switch boobs and keep baby away from toddler.

Good luck and enjoy waking up in a bed full of babies

I co-sleep with both my DDs. There's bugger all info available out there so it was all just trial and error and trying to follow the safety guidelines.

At first it was just me and the girls in the bed and DH in the spare room, then after a couple of weeks we fixed up a sidecar cot (cheapo Ikea jobby). At first DD2 was in there because she likes space around her when she's sleeping but DD1 kept kicking DH so we swapped them over. So now DD1 is in the sidecar and DD2 is in the middle and everyone is happy :)

Feeding from both sides is fine once you get the hang of it, you could lean over a bit further or put your arm under DC2 or both. Trial and error

As long as you are aware of the safety guidelines about pillows and duvets and all that stuff then the rest is just figuring out what works for you.

Hope that helps a bit!

You could try rolling the baby on top of you (biological nursing style) to feed from the boob nearer your toddler? I think if you were supporting baby with the baby-side arm, you'd instinctively put him/her back down that side after. Good luck with it - your family bed sounds like it will be lovely!

Get ahold of a copy of Adventures in Tandem Nursing, there is a chapter in there about positioning.
I tend to go for rotisserie style, with one either side getting their own boob for the night. (Toddler tends not to feed in the night now, so he just empties the engorged side after baby has had the other all night). I also feed baby in biological nurturing with toddler sat up and facing me under my arm. Toddler can also lean over the top while baby feeds lying down, and I have stacked the baby on top of his brother lying down to feed off the top boob.

Thanks all. Yes, I should check out Adventures - I've got it but need to refresh my memory. :)

I've never tried biological nursing positions, so I'll look that up as I think it could be useful.

I see the practicality of changing ends of the bed, but it sounds COLD! DC2 is due to arrive at the end of October, and it's a very cold room (though we'll have to put the heating on a lot more).

I don't know whether DS1 will be feeding too - he's recently been trying to resume night feeds (my colostrum has come in, I think) but I've been managing to get him back to sleep without milk. That may change once baby is here though!

we moved DS out of our bed a while before getting pg with DD, but regarding feeding from the top boob, DD managed from day 3. granted she was huge (9.4 at birth) but still tiny compared to DS!! I also still feed her by lying her on top of me sometimes, calms her down too when she's frantic for whatever reason. it's not quite bio nurturing, but not far off it. she sleeps in the middle anyway, and when DS joins us in the morning, he is on the other side of DH.

I just leaned over so my torso was partially into the mattress and the 'top boob' was more in the 'bottom boob's area. I had my top arm braced against the bed so I couldn't roll but those were more awake than asleep feeds (bottom boob ones I slept through but not top boob ones). Possibly also being able to sleep on your side and on your stomach at the same time helps (hypermobility has a use after all!)

Sounds familiar, Truth. I happen to have hypermobility too. It's nice to find an advantage of it for once. :)

I have fed like that, but DS was much, much older (11 months+) so I wasn't sure whether it'd work with a newborn. I'm glad to hear of Kveta's baby managing (though I hope DC2 won't be quite that big when he arrives!)

BTW, Truth, I've completely lost track - are you still pg, or have you had DC4 by now?

About 8m pg now, baby is due mid-Sept (give or take a few weeks!). You'll know when I have had baby by the vast number of panicky threads I'll have started