how can I get a deeper latch? feeds really hurting at 10 weeks in

[smk84]

Hi (again!). My DS is 10 weeks old and I have never really felt his latch was deep enough. I have had feeds observed by all sorts of people, but I have never seemed to be able to improve it. After the initial couple of weeks I wasn't getting any pain, but my nipples, esp my left, would always be pinched on one side. DS has had 2 colds recently, and he seems to bob about by my nipple and not open as wide as he used to, so the problem has become much worse and i have a sort of blister on my left wlhich is making feeding increasingly painful. i have heard of exaggerated latch but can't seem to manage it. skin to skin helps but i can't do it all the time. i went to my bf group today but didn't really find it helpful :( not sure what to do as not much rl support where i live. i have been in touch with lll, but they don't have a group in my area. pretty stuck and stressed so any advice please? tia

Have you ruled out things like thrush that could be causing the pain?

thank you - they checked ds for thrush at bf group today and no sign, i don't think i have it but syaing that not really sure what to look for ! the blistered bit is red and a little shiny, and for some reason i remember something to do with white patches and thrush? , but i don't have any white patches. the pain seems to be getting worse with each feed. not sure how much longer i can feed from there :( Have tried lying down to feed but that didn't really help much.

Okay... oh I really wish I could help but I don't know what else I can say! Are your nipples dry and cracked at all?

Would you consider using a nipple shield while it heals? It might just help you get through this awful bit. The lack of local support really is awful. Is your HV any good?

not really mormon. belinda i am not sure, maybe i shouldbuy some tomorrow and try. hv is very nice but only works mon and tue, plus i have to go to see her and it's not very comfy to feed there, and i have asked her to observe a feed before (to improve latch) and she didn't watch me attach him, only checked once he was on and said it was fine cos it wasn't hurting and he was swallowing.

Sorry I can't help :( I hope it gets better or you find a solution!

Whereabouts are you? (pm me if you like) I've had full feeds observed (at home) by someone from ABC children's centre.

Have you checked that his lower lip is everted (i.e. out).

I used to get this with mine and it turned out to be that the lower lip was tucked in, gently pushing on the chin and pulling it to get it out sorted it out.

discrete it is everted, but sometimes not by much, and i think it sometimes slips back in in the course of a feed. i so feel like giving up right now, have been trying skin to skin for the last hour and have got to the point where he is not even swallowing anymore :(

You poor thing, it can be so discouraging when it's not working properly.

Mine did have that thing where their lip went back in, I just used to correct it as many times as needed until they did it right every time.

Stick with it, it's a learning curve but once they get the hang of it it is so easy. It just takes some of them a little longer to learn.

Have you tried using an exaggerated latch? You can google it but as far as I remember you wait until mouth opens wide then kind of roll baby on, so press chin to breast first, use other hand to sort of press top of auriola so that nipple point up, when baby nearly on, let go so nipple sort of pings into place.

You are doing great BTW, you are still both learning and when you both get the hang of it it is so blissfully easy :)

I struggled a lot with this. I found lying down with him on top of me sometimes made it perfect (sometimes not). Other good things: squishing my boob before latch-on to get more in (think this may be 'sandwich technique'?), gently flipping baby's bottom lip out if not everted after latch-on, poking at areola on bottom-lip side after latch-on to sneak a bit more in, gently pulling baby's chin down after latch-on to sneak a bit more in. Olive or coconut oil after feeds to relieve (mildly antifungal, but does stain clothes). As much rest between feeds as possible - I found hours of walking with him in the moby kept him contentedly asleep until actual hunger woke him, whereas if he's awake he tends to feed v frequently! Can be hard to be certain when latch is good or bad if there's cumulative soreness from previous feeds.

Ps. It took til about 12w before bf got really comfortable for us, though we were hampered by thrush for a lot of that time. Don't forget baby is still learning and growing (a bigger mouth!) all the time. It does get better. x

Maybe try a feed where his bottom is under your armpit if that makes sense it worked wonders for me. I think it is called a football hold the change gave such relief from the pain.

Good luck.

I also agree shoving for want of a better word you breast in works well too

Oh yes, another vote for rugby ball hold, you end up kind of dangling your boob into their mouth so they have to take a good "bite"

Exaggerated latch animation: users.iptelecom.net.ua/~vylkas/kinolatch.html

Worked for us for 5 months until DD had her tongue tie snipped.... didn't bother for night feeds although it was painful, having the better latch during the day stopped my nipples getting too mangled.

Where are you in the country? Maybe someone could recommend someone?

Hi, sounds like we have the same thing going on. My mother is an ex midwife and this is my 3rd bf baby so I think I should be fairly experienced but I've never had this. My lo is only 3 weeks. Unfortunately if you are anything like me it isn't actually the depth of the latch (mark your babies lower lip with your thumb when they come off). With my my little one he has got into the fairly painful habit of enjoying having the top of my left nipple in the roof of his mouth as opposed to pointing to the back of hisvthroat hence after a feed the top of my left nipple sticks out half an inch more than the lower, yuk! Keep changing feeding positions. I had mine upside down today. If it is unbearable take him off and latch him on again. Also start bf on the less painful side if you can so his harder suck is reserved for the tougher breast. When he feeds less ferociously it will be less painful. If you can, buy some multi mam compresses (larger boots or online). I think they are fantastic, they really speed up the heeling process and I'm sure they're making my nipple tougher!

thak you so much everyone for taking the time to reply , i am going to try the exaggerated latch tonight but in the eman timet hings havee imrpoved a bit and i am not quite as sore. i saw bf mw at hosp yest and she wasn't really able to help with positioning but she reassured me that he is getting plenty of milk and gaining weight, which somehow makes it easier to cope with the soreness. blue yonder not sure what you mean about marking the lower lip? Sorry probably just being dense in baby brain fog ! we have been doing the rugby hold on the right most of the time and i am not sore on that side so it sort of explains a lot. now he is ghetting bigger though i am starting to not be able to fit him in iyswim ! Do you know if It's possible to do rugby hold as babies get bigger? I have had good support from a lll lady on the phone, and I have the chance of going to see her but she is 30 miles away so not sure i can make it as LO not great in the car yet. Thanks again, I am blown away by all your support :) p.s. upside down blue yonder - how does that work? !

oh and meant to say i have had to mega rush this reply and DS almost impossible to put down for sleeps during the day, so i am either feeding or doing sleep duty or looking after DS1, while DS2 is in the moses with the hairdryer on ! I can see the basket moving out of the corner of my eye so my time has run out already - he's only been in there 10 mins !

have you had him checked for tongue-tie?

the shallow latch is a classic symptom.

If he's really impossible to put down, have you considered a ring sling or similar? My sling was a real miracle-sanity-saver with DD who would NOT be put down...