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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Another urgent request for HELP!

76 replies

CadMum · 06/03/2006 14:16

DD2 (our fourth would-be BF child) was born first thing Saturday morning (12:47 am) in a bottle-friendly US hospital. She was taken from me shortly after her birth and whisked off to a nursery. I had to beg and plead with the unsympathetic nurses to bring her back to me at 4:30 in the morning. They were adamant that she needed to be 'warmed' in the nursery but my hysterical tears eventually made them bring her round. Turns out she had had a bottle of formula whilst in their care because we had not specifically asked for her not to have one.Angry Angry Angry

To make a long story short: The same process was repeated on night 2 with Charlotte being taken at midnight depite my protests to be "weighed and for some observation". She was not returned until after some routine blood work at 2:45. I was not a happy camper. Am still really stressed.

I have no milk yet and I resorted to giving her a bottle of formula last night (a first ever for this mummy) as she was NOT going to feed no matter what I tried.

Is all lost?

OP posts:
julienetmum · 06/03/2006 20:50

How wonderful Cadmum.

I too had a baby who refused to latch on but luckily for me had a lovely homebirth, and supportive midwife and HV, oh and my friend down the road is a breastfeeding counsellor.

I am appalled at the actions of the hospital. I knew things were bad in the US but never realised quite how much.

Hope all continues to go well for you.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 06/03/2006 20:55

Excellent news Cadmum! Onwards and upwards Smile

popsycalindisguise · 06/03/2006 20:56

Cadmum - your last post made me cry:) In a good way. My baby is one today so I blame that!

I am so glad that you are having some success now. Those early days are hard enough without the difficulties that you have had.

Like tiktok said, be sure to write to the hospital and tell them how crap they were once things have settled down

Popsy xx

fishie · 06/03/2006 21:00

i'm soooo pleased well done you and charlotte Grin Grin, here's to many happy hours of feeding (and that's just today!)

fishie · 06/03/2006 21:00

i'm soooo pleased well done you and charlotte Grin Grin, here's to many happy hours of feeding (and that's just today!)

Original poster
CadMum · 06/03/2006 21:26

Really can't thank you enough. It was reading all of the posts and remebering my 'former self' that saw us through this rough patch. I suspect that there will be more but at least I can safely say that DD2 will have the same opportunity to be a contented breast fed baby and hopefully toddler.

I am off to express some more milk in preperation for round 2.

Sorry forgot to post this at 3:30. Round 2 now done and similar success. Only expressed just over an ounce again but she enjoyed that and then successfully latched on the other side. We are now both off for a well deserved nap. I hope that she will just feed properly in a few hours but I will have the pump by my side in case she has different ideas.

OP posts:
Original poster
CadMum · 06/03/2006 21:27

Meant to add sorry to make you cry popsycal... I am pleased to say that the whole experience has made me stop crying for the first time today. Happy B-day to your little one.

OP posts:
koolkat · 06/03/2006 21:28

CadMum - sounds like you have a clever little baby !

She was just waiting for your milk to come in and couldn't be bothered to latch when it was just drops of colostrum !

Best of luck for all the happy bf days to come and do please burn the formula and write a nasty letter to the hospital Grin

Miaou · 06/03/2006 21:33

Isn't mumsnet just wonderful....I have tears in my eyes (a few Sad ones at the way you were treated in hospital and lots of Smile ones at the happy ending!)

Well done for sticking at it Cadmum Smile

Racers · 06/03/2006 21:35

This has brought a tear to my eye, too popsycal.

Great news CadMum, I'm so pleased for you. Very Angry on your behalf about the actions of the hospital staff though.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 06/03/2006 21:38

Agree Miaou!

Miaou · 06/03/2006 21:45

I guess you are wrapped up in your gorgeous new baby just now Cadmum, but from my distant perspective I have to say that what the hospital staff did (give formula against your express wishes and leaving you in distress) is tantamount to assault - if you feel you have the emotional/physical energy to follow it up that would be a good thing to do IMO.

teacups · 06/03/2006 21:47

more tears here cadmum....so glad that things are working out for you and Charlotte. Keep us posted and enjoy your much deserved babymoon Smile

Original poster
CadMum · 06/03/2006 22:40

Rather frustratiing time at last feed. She just would not latch again. Managed to express just over 2 oz and fed her that but she still didn't feed. Will keep persisting but I suspect that she will become very yellow like her brothers and sister before her. Oh well, at least I have played this exhausting game before.

Filled with dread at the thought of having to see the Dr tomorrow as I would sooner DIE than have her re-admitted. Wish me well for a long long night.

OP posts:
VeniVidiVickiQV · 06/03/2006 22:45

It will be very up and down at first. You are doing great though Cadmum. Smile

Original poster
CadMum · 07/03/2006 00:26

I suppose that there must be loads of success stories with babies who 'learn' to BF later in life.

Thanks again. Dinner and then more expressing and feeding for the evening.

OP posts:
kiskidee · 07/03/2006 05:04

really really pleased Charlotte has latched on. and more tears and lump in throat here. when reading your original post, I also was thinking that giving your baby formula against your wishes is assault. and would find a way to make an official complaint against the hospital staff.

if Charlotte develops jaundice, make it expressly known that you will feed her exclusively or else. I also have my sad tale about jaundice and hospital staff. i am so Angry for you. some mw's seem to get some cheap thrill out of feeding formula to newborns.

Original poster
CadMum · 07/03/2006 05:19

Am in tears agaiin... Having a rotten night. At least I have a plan though.

As soon as she is wrapped up in her blanket she starts to root but will NOT take the breast. I am finding this ever so vexing. I did resort to giving her another bottle--this time of expressed milk because she cried for nearly a whole hour and I was just a ball of snot and tears as well.

Really hope that tomorrow goes just that much better. Thanks again for all of the support.

OP posts:
kiskidee · 07/03/2006 05:43

cadmum, feeling Sad for you. i would be the same. try to cupfeed/spoonfeed/dropper feed her instead of bottle as that can cause nipple confusion.

\link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?addwatch=1&topicid=1364&threadid=85327\hth}

\link{http://www.mother-2-mother.com/refusingbottle.htm\cupfeed}

I don't have any info for getting baby to latch but lots more will.

If you are keen to search for more help before more people come online, search for threads started by 'berolina' in about May / June 2005. she had lots of difficulty with latch but got it right with lots of MN support and I think she is still bf.

tiktok · 07/03/2006 09:51

CadMum - it's not unusual for a bad start to be resolved with a few ups and downs along the way.

Don't worry about using a bottle - VVV's feeling that non-bottle feeds are better is shared by many, but not me. As long as you are working on the breastfeeding, there's no reason to assume the bottle teat will cause confusion. The disadvantage of the bottle and teat in the very early days is that it can get unnecessarily large amounts in to the baby, and that if it is colostrum in the bottle, precious drops can stick to the sides and be lost.

After the first days, a bottle is just fine and usually a lot easier than a cup or a syringe.

Don't let your baby cry for long - makes it even less likely she will latch on. Give formula/ebm in a small amount to calm her and then try again on the breast.

I don't understand about being wrapped in a blanket.....keep her skin to skin with you with a blanket over the two of you and you will not need to mess about with wrapping her up.

Hope this isin't confusing.

it might help you to stay off the computer for half a day and just concentrate on being with your baby and chillin'.....sometimes the pressure to read posts and to share updates can interfere with this.

Just an idea :)

tiktok · 07/03/2006 09:52

Sorry - don;t use a bottle came from kiskidee, not VVV.

Original poster
CadMum · 07/03/2006 11:31

Thanks tiktok: Will spend the morning in bed with her. Have had plenty of skin to skin but never a successful latch in bed. (Bar sitting up with pillows to prop her up.)

I only swaddled her up in a blanket as a last resort to calm her because sadly, it works. As soon as there is a tight wrap aound her body she becomes calm and alert.

Thanks again for your help.

OP posts:
VeniVidiVickiQV · 07/03/2006 15:11

ShockTiktok has it in for me today WinkGrin

popsycalindisguise · 07/03/2006 19:23

Can you call the breastfeeding counsellor again? I wish I had called one with ds1. He was severely jaundiced at three days (special care, triple phototherapy, IV drip, staye din for 2 weeks before levels came down and had to have follow up tests). Because I did not know what I know now, he was mixed fed from day 3 and breast feeding tailed off by about 3 months or so. Made me more stubborn to make it work with ds2.

Slight tangent - but do ring the counsellor and if she becomes jaundiced there are several things which will help without resorting to formula if that is not what you want.

laundrylover · 07/03/2006 21:39

Hi Cadmum,

Congrats on baby Charlotte and so sorry to read about your feeding woes. My cousin had her baby last week and is struggling with the latch too but is expressing and formula feeding for the time being. Hospital's impatience to blame again Angry Anyway her SIL told her that her 3rd child wouldn't latch on until 6 weeks and was then BF for ages so hang on in there!!
Sending hugs over the sea from all of us on the due March thread.Smile

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