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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

How old was your breastfed baby when you let them sleep over elsewhere?

22 replies

haloflo · 16/07/2012 18:50

DD has a great relationship with my IL's who she sees once a week all day. They'd like her to stay over (and tbh I would love a night off)

Problem is she isn't night weaned and often wakes for 2 plus feeds. However she is 15 months so probably doesn't need night feeds.

How old was your breastfed baby when you let them stay over at someone elses house? Were they still feeding at night?

Did you regret it or wish you'd done it sooner?

OP posts:

emsyj · 16/07/2012 19:39

I gave up bf at 12 months and let her stay overnight with the ILs (same situation as you, she spent one day a week with them) a couple of months after that.

Has she ever spent a night without feeds? I would personally be inclined to night wean her first, but if she will happily drink some milk from a cup if she wakes then give it a try.

Original poster

haloflo · 16/07/2012 19:43

No she has never not fed at night. Longest stretch of sleep is probably 7 hours.

Hmm she'd push a cup away from me and my DP but its hard to know what she'd do if she was elsewhere and knew her mum wasn't around to give her milk.

I'm inclined to agree with you about nightweaning. Just need to find the strength to do that!

OP posts:

PoppyWearer · 16/07/2012 19:44

I did it with DS for 2 nights when he was 8mo and still waking for bf at night. He did also take bottles though.

Not my choice, DH whisked me away and arranged it all in secret. I wasn't too happy (until we got to where we were going, which was fabulous).

But, it was fine. He took bottles at night from MIL, I pumped, and we picked up where we left off on my return.

Declutterbug · 16/07/2012 19:45

3-4 years?

More like 18 months to be left overnight with DH whilst I went away.

One of mine is nearly 5 and still not really ready for a night away from home. Nothing to do with bf, more personality and confidence.

emsyj · 16/07/2012 19:46

You might get a pleasant surprise that night weaning is easier than you expect - you never know. It didn't take long for us - I think DD was waking for comfort rather than the milk itself, and she didn't respond badly at all to me stopping offering feeds. I think it took 3 nights in total.

SauvignonBlanche · 16/07/2012 19:49

9 years old
I had stopped BFing 8 years previously though!

NovemberAli · 16/07/2012 19:55

8 months at my parents, had expressed a good stash and she was okay with having a bottle at that point

happypotamus · 17/07/2012 22:32

DD is 14mo and has not yet stayed overnight without me (despite ILs asking for the past 13months). She occasionally sleeps through without waking for a feed but not regularly. However, I have to work nightshifts every couple of weeks and she manages without me. DH offers her cows milk in a cup and cuddles if she wakes. She doesn't like it but she survives.

hellymelly · 17/07/2012 22:42

Mine haven't stayed anywhere without me ever,(other than the two nights I was in hospital having dd2) they are 7 and 5....But then they don't have Grandparents who are well enough to have them, and they have never wanted to be away (co-sleep). I think that while you still bf it might upset your baby a lot to wake and not have you there- i would wait until she is a little bit older or until she stops bf in the night-time. But you know your baby and how she is likely to react- do you think she would be upset if she woke and you weren't there?

Cosmosis · 19/07/2012 12:27

He was 14m. He was nightweaned at the time though (for about 2m). he stayed with the person he is closest to apart from DH and I, but didn't have a great night, he was teething for a start. She got in to bed with him at about 5am becuase he wouldnt settle and he tried to latch on she got a bit of a shock but I tolder her to take it as a compliment!

I don't regret it but I woudn't have done it any sooner either.

TheSurgeonsMate · 19/07/2012 12:38

13 months. She wasn't night weaned, but she could drink from a cup. She was with her grandparents at their house where she, too, spends one day a week. I carried on feeding in the night until she was over 2 years old.

worldgonecrazy · 19/07/2012 12:47

At 4 months I went away for the night, had a good stash of milk ready. DD had nightweaned by 10-12 months anyway so since then it's not been a problem.

mawbroon · 19/07/2012 13:00

DS1 was 4yo, it wasn't to do with the feeding that I hadn't left him, he just wasn't emotionally ready for it.

DS2, completely different kettle of fish, left him at around 21months. He had a great time, didn't miss me at all!

Ds2 was still night feeding, but he sleeps straight through any time I'm not there!

HarderToKidnap · 19/07/2012 13:16

6mo, he was/is still waking at least once to feed. He took a bottle of EBM from my mum, no problem.

Original poster

haloflo · 19/07/2012 13:32

I think i'm going to go for it. They live round the corner so can bring her home if she is crying too much. I think they will probably have to get up for a bit in the middle of the night for a drink and maybe a snack but they are prepared to do that.

She will wake and will be upset but I believe they will comfort her. She honestly loves her grandparents to pieces and I trust them 100% with her. My MIL would NEVER let her cry and I'm happy for them to co sleep (which no doubt they will).

OP posts:

HappyAsASandboy · 19/07/2012 14:18

I left my bf DTs at my house with my mum when they were just over a year, still feeding, and cosleeping for the majority of the night. I was away with work.

They were fine. They woke several times, had a quick cuddle from Nanny and went back in their cots. No hassles at all. If I try and do that, they get angry and demand feeding and staying in the bed (unless I can sneak them out after they've fed to sleep!). But for Nanny, they behaved perfectly. I did it again when they were about 18 months (again, a work thing) and they were fine then too.

They still feed several times a night each now (22 months) and cosleep too. But it's nice to know that they're fine overnight with Nanny if I want to go away :)

You didn't ask this, but I would be much happier leaving them with a GP at your house so that at least their beds/rooms are familiar. Unless they spend enough time at your MiL's house for that to feel like home too ...

Cosmosis · 19/07/2012 20:10

I forgot I went away with work when he was still feeding at night and left him with dh, he had ebm which he was well used to anyway and was fine.

Original poster

haloflo · 21/07/2012 12:06

She was fine! Bed at 8, woke 1 and 4 and needed rocking back to sleep. Took 10 minutes apparently. No milk or even water taken at night.

I missed her though and was very pleased to see her again this morning.

OP posts:

Cosmosis · 21/07/2012 12:51

Great

TheSurgeonsMate · 22/07/2012 20:20

Make sure you post your positive experience for the next person that asks!

JiltedJohnsJulie · 22/07/2012 20:22

DD was 4.5 and had been weaned since 2.8. She's not even a PFB either .

Original poster

haloflo · 22/07/2012 20:27

surgeon I will. I still can't believe it. She is so persistent at home but clearly different house/carer and different expectations. I wasnt even engorged either so she really doesn't drink much at night.

OP posts:

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