Very unsettled 4.5 week old baby

[AliHasQuestions]

Hi

I hope somebody can give me some advice. My DD2 is 4.5 weeks old and is bottle fed expressed breast milk with the odd formula top up where necessary as I was never able to get her to latch on, despite extensive support and trying many different things. This isn't a thread about that though :) She currently has 7 feeds a day, each around 4oz.

My problem is that she spends pretty much all her awake time crying. This can be for 1-2 hours after each feed, so we spend most of our day either feeding her, expressing or trying to get her back to sleep as that seems to be the only time she's not crying! I wonder how this is helping her learn the difference between night and day...

I think she is quite windy - we are using Infacol and I am planning on getting some gripe water (can I use both at the same time?) but I'm not sure whether that's the only problem or whether there is something else bothering her. Sometimes she seems like she's still hungry but we have been told by two different professionals that we are overfeeding her already so we are a bit paranoid about giving her more! I think she would eat more if we offered it though, but I am also worried about making the wind worse.

Does anyone have any suggestions about how we can manage this? Is it normal for a newborn to cry a lot like this? It is pretty exhausting and stressful, particularly at night, and I am also worried I am neglecting DD1 (she is even getting bored of CBeebies :))

Any advice would be really appreciated, thank you.

Why not try giving her more milk one day, if she has too much she will just sick it up - i don't think you can actually hurt her by doing it. I would try anything to stop constant crying. Plus trying going for a long walk with her in the buggy, the fresh air might help you and her and take dd1 to the park for some mummy time.

i would try feeding her a bit more, if you think she looks like she wants it. I would listen to your own instinct above professional advice

Sorry to hear she is so unsettled. Could it be reflux? Sounds familiar if she is crying after feeding.

Maybe see you GP. Could be reflux. Or see an osteopath, she could have some tension from after the birth my DD had a very tight neck 3 sessions with an osteopath all sorted.

If she's very windy try doing cycling knees where you push the knees gently but firmly into the middle of her tummy whilst pedling them round - really helps get out trapped farts!

Thank you all. I am going to try increasing her feeds slightly and see if that makes a difference first of all. Out of interest, how much do/did others feed a 5 week old baby?

Sorry my original post was so long, only just realised

Ali, what are her pooey nappies like? What colour? What texture?

Sounds gross, but it's relevant.

Hi Baggy

They are yellow, runny and slightly seedy. And there are a lot of them! What would you be thinking of in relation to this please? You've got me worried now (I thought you were meant to be less paranoid second time round ).

I could be wrong but I think the PP is thinking of either milk protein intolerance (CMPI) or some sort of temp. lactose intolerance in referring to poo. I stand to be corrected :) Both of these can affect 'output'; lactose intolerance is quite rare and if a serious problem you would know all about it by now as your babe would be doing very poorly in terms of weight gain etc.

Milk protein intolerance can lead to uber-fussy babies and can be addressed by the mum cutting out all sources of milk in her diet and by either getting rid of or changing any supplementary formula feeds to a formula suitable for babies with CMPI .

One thought - have you looked inside your baby's mouth? does she have good tongue mobility - any signs of tongue tie (these could include clicking while feeding from breast, complete failure to latch, slipping off nipple continuously, among other things.) Sometimes babies with tongue tie take in large amounts of air when feeding, even on a bottle.

Is she any better if she is in a sling, close to you?

Sorry just read that you could never manage to get your baby latched . Which perhaps makes some anatomical issue like tongue tie more likely. Don't worry, it's not uncommon and easily fixed. Although of course there are plenty of other reasons why babies might struggle to latch (e.g., inappropriate shoving of head toward boob by HCPs etc) ...

She has been thoroughly checked for tongue tie due to the failure to latch and nothing obvious was found. She is gaining weight really well - following the 75th percentile which she was born on. Maybe she is just a hungry baby.

I only have a baby carrier rather than a proper sling and have only tried it once (no idea why it took so long to occur to me, sleep deprivation maybe ) and yes she seemed to settle a bit better.

Just to say, my DS was checked for tongue tie by umpteen people (midwives, health visitors, a breasfteeding counsellor who worked at the hospital) and they all missed his posterior tie. There was nothing to 'see' as such, it just looked like he had a very wee, short tongue. A qualified lactation consultant might be able to have a look just to draw a line under it

If the sling helps, I would deffo invest in a baby carrier like a moby wrap or similar. My friend swore by hers for her firstborn.

I really sympathise, our 8 wk old is the same and has been since 3 weeks. We've spoken with GP, HV and a maternity nurse and found that sleep is the key. Without enough sleep our baby simply wants to comfort feed and latch on (even though she's not really hungry). This can cause excessive wind and make her uncomfortable as she's taking in lots of foremilk. The only way to spread out the feeds we found was to try to get her to sleep.
Most 5 wk old baby need lots of sleep during the day to prevent being overtired (aim for 3x2 hr naps during day if you can).

We're using a dummy (and were advised to by GP and may nurse) which seems to calm her and sometimes helps her sleep.
We're also using Infacol which I think is helping. We tried gripe water but because its very runny found our baby struggled to swallow it properly.

Is your baby struggling to fall asleep or stay asleep for long during the day? We're using a sling which sometimes works but sometimes she doesn't settle. All we can hope for is to keep her calm and not crying.

Its incredibly hard when a baby that young doesn't sleep during the day...

Is she kicking or going ridgid in pain when she cries after feeds ? Is she arching back ? My lo does this - we think it is reflux . She is on gaviscon and we sometimes use gripe water x

Thanks everyone. She definitely doesn't have a tongue tie - we were referred to the tongue tie clinic at Kings College Hospital and their lactation consultant couldn't see a tie although her tongue does lift slightly more on one side than the other. Although this may be part of the reason why she didn't latch on, I'm not convinced it's related to the crying.

She can struggle to fall asleep / stay asleep, particularly in the evenings but isn't always worked up at that point. And yes, she does kick her legs a lot (and flap her arms). She doesn't arch her back that much, and when she does I have assumed she was rooting for more food, but maybe it's pain. I shall watch whether she does it when DH feeds her too. I did wonder about reflux but my HV said she'd be being sick if it was that, is that not the case? I think it might be wind as she grunts and strains a lot too.

I hope all your babies settle and feel better soon. Thank you for the support. :)

Doesn't need to be any vomit for reflux - it's so-called silent reflux when there's no vomit.

I would look into dairy allergy. It is probably more common than people realise.