Am messing up BF

[GingerLemonTea]

Hi,
Baby 3 weeks old. Intended to BF. Had EMCS. Baby latched on in hospital, but was also given formula with my consent by MWs twice as I wasn't producing much milk. I also had to express in hospital. Found bf very painful, but latch was checked by several people in hospital & found to be ok. She was checked for tongue tie and ok.
When we came home, I contuinued with the bf, but found it so painful I was wincing/ crying with pain. Got some Medela nipple shields which allowed me to continue. Milk seemed to satisfy her up until night, when I felt I couldn't keep going. We were both getting upset & she was fussing a lot.
So I tried to go with the flow of cluster feeding, but ended up giving formula as last feed, which is now a daily habit. Also now I feel she becomes very fussy/ unsatisfied with my milk in the afternoon and am having to top her up with formula.
I feel like BF is slipping away from me and that am not producing enough milk for her as she guzzles the formula & seems much more content afterwards.
I would like to continue BF, but feel am in a vicious circle and using formula more. Please advise.

Sounds familiar to my experience - except my ds wouldn't latch on at all and I as expressing and topping up with formula. If you really want to continue breastfeeding then persevere - you're far from th point of no return!!

First thing to do is find yourself a breastfeeding clinic or milk cafe - your Hv should be blue to tell you - they're often in children's centres - google breastfeeding and the nseof your local authority. Talk to a breastfeeding consultant - they often do home visits. Go tomorrow.

If you think tongue tie may be an issue get a second opinion - I though my ds may have tongue tie, asked the mw at the hospital and she said no - he eventually was diagnosed at 3 weeks! We have been bf without shields ever since.

Sotp the top ups and just stick your lo on the boob - you really have stick with the flow of cluster feeds - I know that it feels lie there's nothing there but there will be - it's just to start with it will take constant feeding to get enough - that constant feeding is what tells your boobs to produce more. If you stop and then ff you will be giving harm the opposite message. It takes a leap of faith but if you reconcile yourself to 2 or 3 nights of feeding constantly and having a baby that never seems to be full you will increase your milk supply - going to ff gets your lo settled straight way but a you are already aware gets in the wy of yor supply.

For the first 3 weeks of my sons life he was totally bottle fed a mixture of breast and formula milk - then it was using a shield with formula top up - then after his tongue tie was sited it was all breast and yes, he slept less than after a bottle of formula nd he been lost some weight but ne at 12 weeks I can't remember the last time e had formula, he is putting on weight perfectly (tracking 50th percentile), I express enough so that his dad can give him his post bath feed and the odd sachet for the freezer nd for the last week he has slept 7 hours straight without waking up. But we only did it by holding our revenue through being less settled at night and an interuption in his weight gain. I should mention, at no point was the Hv worried about his weight but when his gain was moderate as opposed to good I was told to cut out the formula top up and express instead.

It may feel like it is slipping away but you can still grab it back!!

Good luck!

So sorry for the typos - I blame the iPad and the late hour!

We didn't hold our revenue we held our nerve!!!

your milk is made in a supply and demand fashion, so the more baby feeds the more milk will be made. The cluster feeding was explained to me as the baby putting in the order for the next days milk. What worked for me was biological nurturing position (comfy for both of us) and lots of skin to skin. Also learning to feed lying down for when I was completly knackered.

Regarding the tongue tie, hopefully the person that checked for you is experienced in tt diagnosis, a lot of 'professionals' aren't.
You have come to the right place for advice but if you can get some real life support it would be even better. Someone to check the babys mouth, the latch and look at milk transfer.

The first few weeks are the hardest so dont be too hard on yourself:)
Hopefully someone else will come along with advice on getting baby off bottle and back on the boob.

Right, all is not doomed. There is help out there and even if you don't continue breastfeeding she has had a lot of good stuff from you, so give yourself a pat on the back for getting this far in difficult circs.

If it is painful it doesn't matter how it looks to someone else. Pain is not good (except possibly if it is only for the first few seconds, temporarily as previous damage heals).

Can you go to a breastfeedng support group - try searching here. You need to talk through everything to work out what you want, what is really happening with the two of you, how much formula she is having etc.

Some babies fuss, it may be she prefers the bottle as milk comes out with little effort and she feels so full she is zonked after. Breast milk is easy and quick to digest hence why they are often feeding more frequently than ff babies. It may also just be her - they change all the time, she may also have a bug or her eyesight has improved and she is spooked by something in your house. Who knows, so don't presume fussy means breastfeeding is going wrong. My ds used to scream and arch his back and he loves to bf still at 2 years!

Those evening feeds are important to establish and maintain your supply in the early days as your hormone levels are higher at those times. Depending how much formula she is having you can cut down on this and offer lots of opportunities to bf in the evening / night. Think about safe co-sleeping to provide the chance to feed.

Plenty of people do mix feed both formula and breast milk too.

just to add that cluster feeding if unexpected is enough to have anyone reaching for the formula, you just have to keep the faith and trust in the magic of breastfeeding. good luck

I second all the MumoftheMoos says. The more you top-up with formula, the less your DD is feeding from you & the less your breasts will be stimulated to make milk. Cluster feed & go with her needs - you will feel like you are feeding a lot & often the first few weeks but she only has a small stomach at this point - you'll grow together. She will be more restless / need to feed more often on breast milk as it is more quickly processed by her body than formula.

Your milk production is particularly stimulated during the early morning hours (1am-6am) - thanks mother nature. So feeding then will help too.

Don't worry about using nipple shields if they make it more comfortable - they don't necessarily affect your production so long as the breast is being stimulated. I have inverted nipples & fed DD1 for 22 months using them the whole time.

Good luck & if you do end up giving up and using formula be glad that you live in a country with a clean water supply & a good alternative source of food for your growing girl.

You aren't messing anything up, just doing your best in difficult circumstances. BFing often takes weeks to establish even without the problems you have had. The advice above is great. I would also suggest trying biological nurturing (www.biologicalnurturing.com) - I found latching on much easier and it's a very comfortable way to feed as your body is supported.