anyone heard of a 4 week nursing strike??

[rosied]

Just wondering if 'nursing strikes' can last as long as 4 weeks or if we're going through early self-weaning?
I have a 11 month old who was happily breastfeeding 5-6 times a day until a really bad teething bout when he stopped feeding overnight. I say happily but he had become increasingly fussy about feeds, would not feed with distractions around so I used to feed him in a dark room and do nothing at the same time except maybe reading when he was well settled into the feed, after let-down. Not easy with a 5 year old around but I rearranged the family routine so he could feed that way every day.
For the first 2 weeks of the 'strike' I was optimistic about him starting again and tried lots of topless playing, skin to skin contact during nap times etc. and I was expressing every day. I had great support from the local La Leche League Leader and I stayed at home a lot so I could really focus on him feeding again. But this last week I have been feeling so depressed about the whole thing, I can't express now as I'm just in floods of tears whenever I try. I also recognise that I need to get out the house more for my own psychological well-being and perhaps need to focus on that rather than staying in being available for feeding.
He seems so young to have self- weaned but maybe he has, or maybe he'll return to it in his own time. It would so help to hear if anyone else has ever had a nursing strike last this long.

Not really advice, but my experience. My first baby now 4, was 10 weeks early which made breastfeeding difficult but we managed with mixed feeding until she was 34 weeks old. She then suddenly refused both breasts one morning and that was that. She never breast fed again. I found this very upsetting, my milk supply had been very poor due to the start I had when brest feeding and I had tried everything to maintain what little supply I had. In the end I just accepted that this was what she wanted even if I didn't agree (with an 8 month old!!) and that at least I had given her the best start that I could.
This might not be of any comfort to you now, but please don't make yourself too upset over it as you begin to lose sight of all the other wonderful things that are happening

Flump30

thanks flump30. You're right about losing sight of all the other wonderful things. I have to keep reminding myself I was lucky to have been able to bf exclusively for as long as 6 months (we had problems due to tongue tie and almost had to give up at 4 weeks). I know I am very wrapped up in this problem right now and that it's really minor in the grand scheme of things, but it is hard to get some distance.
I'm sure raging hormones are a part - I've been up & donw like a yo yo ever since ds2 stopped bf and think I must be missing the oxytocin?

rosied I flipped completely when I gave up bf last time so agree with you over the hormones - I've asked dh to take a week off when I give up this time (seriously!)

My ds went on nursing strike for nearly a week recently rosied just before his first birthday. It was really upsetting and draining so I know a bit of what you're feeling and I'm really sorry this has gone on so long. How draining for you. I did come across a couple of stories of extended nursing strikes while I combed the internet for stories during my own research but I can't remember where they are. I was on the La Leche League website a lot.

Have youi tried kellymom? BF is their big subject so you might find more info there. There's also the BF network. They have counsellors in most areas and lend out electric pumps aparently.

There's conflict between wanting to continue because you believe it's right, and letting go because you're exhausting yourself. It's almost like mourning.

I don't know how long I would have continued trying. Mine only lasted less than a week but I had fed three other children well into their second and third years so I didn't feel it was right to stop so soon, so abruptly.

Tiktok may come along and help you out here.

I wish you all the best whatever happens. CAT me if you like because I know a bit of what you're going through.

Love spider x

Thanks Em32 and Spidermama. I read your thread about your strike spidermama and it was that that prompted me to post the message. I had pretty much given up and was having a bad day, but then reading about your situation and the supportive comments, I just thought it seemed worth holding out some hope and going back to thinking about it again.
Part of the reason I feel so sad is that this is my last baby and I hadn't realised it would be a last feed or even a slowing down, so I wasn't prepared emotionally. It is like grieving - I cried last night when I realised I couldn't remember what his little face looked like when he was feeding. I raided the video camera and at least found a brief glimpse of us nursing away!

I had also decided to go for extended bf and let DS2 decide when to wean with no timelimit of my own. DH was fine with that idea - happy to trust me to do the right thing. I've started going to la leche league meetings locally where lots of toddlers feed - they just look so lovely feeding from their own safe, special place and then running off to have fun. I leave each meeting really happy, thinking that will be me and DS2 in a years time.

So, I am going to keep hoping but will try and get a balance between that and accepting that I've got loads of other ways of expressing love and being close to ds2.

Yes rosied, you may as well keep offereing every now and then because you never know. It sounds like you're doing what you can and remaining realistic about the possibility that it might be over at the same time. I reckon you'll know yourself if and when the time comes to stop offering.

I understand your description of grieving feelings. I also remember watching mums feeding at M&T group and really welling up inside. I felt rejected by my ds too.

How's your supply? Are you expressing?