One year old bf and dropping feeds advice please

[upcydaisy]

Approaching his 1st birthday and I'm unsure of the guidelines of milk feeds etc.

I know it is recommended up to 2 years but once they are one and food is no longer "for fun' and we should be on 3 proper meals a day plus snacks, how do we go about making sure that they are not filling up on milk at the expense of eating food?

At the moment I bf him between meals and also gauge him needing any extra milk feeds in a day by how much solids he ate, night wakings, how big a feed his previous feeds were etc. Should I start thinking about dropping a feeds when he shows less interest, very short feeds etc? Is this how it works?

Also I know the hv say to introduce cows milk at this age,( I can't remember how much though?). However I am not a big fan of cow milk for drinking (I have it in coffee and eat a little yogurt and cheese and that's about it.....grew up in a family where there was allergies/intolerances so I've always been a bit wary of having too much and like to use alternatives also) so I would like to avoid giving DS too much dairy (he has a bit of cheese and yogurt when I do at present). So I would like to keep bf him for this reason also so want to start cutting down on bf but definitely don't want to cut down to much.

Didn't want to tell the hv all this though as she was very keen on cow milk and I didn't want to get into a discussion about it. As it is also my personal belief that cow milk is for calves and too much is not actually that healthy. So I was wondering if anyone had some information about it.

To me its seems your BF a lot! My DS is 10 months and has milk (bf) when he wakes up at 6, then before bed at 7. During the day he has three meals and a snack at 3pm. He went down to two feeds when he started nursery at 8-9months!

I've spoken to HV and this is what he should be on with the view to cutting out morning milk at 1. Then it will be 1 nighttime feed. There's no need for cows milk as a drink. My Ds won't be!

My DD2 is one too.

You are right. There is no obligation at all to introduce cows milk as a drink. It's just that past one you can if you want to. If he likes it, great. If not, breastfeeding and any other dairy foods are absolutely fine. For some reason HVs are often obsessed by drinking milk. My DD1 never did (and still doesn't) and TBH I haven't even bothered to try yet with DD2. Will at some point just in case she's keen on it.

I think you are possibly making it a bit technical with all your adjustments! Children vary a lot. DD2 eats loads of solids, but would still bf 20 times a day if I let her. DD1 by this age was just morning, tea time and night. I would be led by him and just try to avoid giving a milk feed in the hour or two before a planned meal. There is also no obligation to get them eating snacks - indeed some people would argue that it's better to have a breastfeed than get into the habit of snacking lots in terms of adult eating habits!

Have you thought about teaching your son a sign so that he can ask for milk when he wants it? DD2 took to that in about 2 days and now uses it every 20 bloody minutes.

I know it does seem a lot! He is actually eating a lot during his meals too.

Not too sure what I can do about it though as he is hungry. I will be going back to work in August so won't be around to bf as often during the day, this might make a difference too but I hope he won't start waking more at night.

Thanks for the info on the cow milk too.

Thanks youlllaugh
I guess I have been scared about not offering in the day as he has always been a terrible sleeper so I got into the habit of feeding at day to ward off the night feeds!!!

This has worked but I am still a bit scared about him waking again to feed.

How did you introduce the sign? He is not so good with communication at all yet (doesn't wave, point etc) so hopefully it will work. I haven't thought f that yet.

I am so relieved about the cow milk!

If he's happily eating plenty of solids I would just chill and enjoy the ease of feeding when he wants it (and just noticed a typo, I meant to say 'hour or so' before a meal, not 'hour or two'). Parenting throws up enough worries IME without adding ones you don't need to. He'll cut back when he is ready.

I found when I went back to work after DD1 (didn't go back after no. 2) that she naturally dropped her feeds. Even on days I was there she was settled into a morning/night pattern.

Sorry, cross post! I did a thread about DD2 grabbing at my chest and it was suggested. Will try and find it...

My thread about signing is here.

It doesn't sound a lot to me but then all of mine were having around 10-12 feeds at 1y (DD1 also had 4 night feeds). I did introduce cow's milk to DD1 & DD2 when they were toddlers (~15m or so) but then I was pg with the next baby and my supply had dropped (they still nursed though ). DD3 had a much more relaxed intro to cow's milk and was a fair bit older when she had it in a cup.

This is the World Health Organisation's guidelines on complementary solids-

6-8m need 130 kcals of complementary foods and 485 kcals from milk (approx 650ml of bm at 75kcals per 100ml) total 615 kcals a day

9-11m need 310 kcals of complementary foods and 376 kcals from milk (approx 500ml of bm at 75kcals per 100ml) total 686 kcals a day.

12-23m need 580 kcals of complementary foods and 314 kcals from milk (approx 420ml of bm at 75kcals per 100ml) total 894 kcals a day.

Full details here on page 18. Please note that there is different values for industrialised/developed countries and developing countries. I have listed the industrialised/developed countries figures (i.e. it relates to the UK) .

None of the guidance suggests giving cow's milk where the mother is bfing and wishes to continue.