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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

18 week old will only bf to sleep

14 replies

appleandplum · 31/05/2012 23:43

My 18 week old will not go to sleep without being breastfed, i tried from early on to pat to sleep in his moses basket/cot but it does not wrk unless i feed him. He used to cluster feed all evening and it was the only way to get him to sleep. He now has a bottle at bedtime but i still usually end up gving a quick bf top up straight after or shorty after.
How do i get over this or will he grow out of it? I have a few nights away planned in August where he will be staying with grandparents and i can't imagine how he will be.

OP posts:
tiktok · 01/06/2012 00:14

This is normal, apple - he's only little still and you are his world :)

It's easier not to fight it, honestly/

August is over two months away - he may well be able to settle without a bf then.

Are you actually away from him overnight? Nearer the time you can maybe work towards it being something you're both comfortable with, but it's too soon to be worrying about it now, IMO.

olimpia · 01/06/2012 08:05

Yes like tiktok says things change all the time when they're this little. My DS who's more or less the same age was only falling asleep on the boob but recently he's surprised me by falling asleep by himself if I give him his blanket when he's clearly tired. He snuggles up to it and goes to sleep by himself. I didn't do anything to teach him at all, it just happened and caught me by surprise!

G1nger · 01/06/2012 19:56

Olimpia - can I please ask how old?

OP - Your baby might not be ready, or it might be that you can try other things. I find my baby - 8.5 months - can fall asleep if I sing lullabies when he's drowsy and laying down. I have also perfected my rock (though I was terrible at it when he was your baby's age. Try other things - with the aim of getting your baby calm enough to fall asleep - but continue with the breast to calm him down whenever he gets loud again rather than calm and falling asleep. Or it might just not be the time yet x

ag123 · 01/06/2012 20:04

To be honest I haven't read it properly yet but I know a lot of people rate the 'No Cry Sleep Solution' for getting over the feed-to-sleep scenario.

olimpia · 01/06/2012 20:15

He's 4 months today!
First happened on Tuesday morning. He had been awake for a couple of hours already and seemed quite tired. I put him on my bed right in the middle, gave him his cotton blanket, he buried his face in it and i went to take a shower. When I came back he had gone to sleep! Has been doing it again every day since.
Previously he would only fall asleep on my boob or in the car seat.

G1nger · 01/06/2012 20:22

Olimpia - crikey! How fantastic for you :) I'll be trying it :)

olimpia · 01/06/2012 20:33

Couldn't believe it either Grin

midori1999 · 01/06/2012 20:53

Yes it's normal and yes, at some point they grow out of it.

DD is only 11 months old and although she still liks ot be cuddled eithe to sleep or until she is nearly asleep, she no longer feeds to sleep for the night. I am gutted tbh, it made life soooooo much easier. Don't wish it away!

fhdl34 · 01/06/2012 20:59

my DD has just started occasionally using a muslin to get herself to sleep. We were out and about on holiday last week so she used it twice to get to sleep and has done it since we've been home too! She's just turned 5 months. She mainly still feeds to sleep but I've given her it when drowsy (i.e. I've put her down asleep after feeding and she's woken) and she's gone back off with it. So glad she's done this with muslins and not a specific toy. Tonight I'm going to put her down and leave the muslin with her so if she wakes she might use it to get back off. That's the plan anyway, have to wait and see if she's read the same plan as me though :)

Mombojombo · 01/06/2012 21:19

It is normal - night time breast milk has sleep hormones in it after all Wink

I can wholly understand your concern at this stage - it can all feel a bit claustrophobic, but weigh up whether you'd rather feed to sleep and be done in a few cosy, cuddly minutes, or rock/pat to sleep over ages of possible crying and faff. Try to enjoy those moments of absolute peace where all you have to do is lie in the quiet and dark with a lovely, warm, sleepy baby.

Babies can be fickle b*ggers - he'll probably be fine with the g-parents and they'll wonder what you were worried about (and as others have said, that's a long way away in baby development terms).

mumtocuddlebundle · 01/06/2012 21:30

Don't want to get your hopes up too much, but my ds1 also started falling asleep in cot by himself at 4 months. It happened by accident one night. I didn't even realise he was that tired. It had been 2 hours since last nap and I lay him in cot while I got changed. Next thing I knew he had fallen asleep! Couldn't believe it.
We tried it the next night at exact 2 hours since his nap and worked again. So we started it as a routine.
He didn't start settling himself for naps til about 7 months I think. But did for nightime at 4 months.

GiantTess · 01/06/2012 21:41

DD is 18 weeks and usually only feeds to sleep (using the lying down position). However she has astonished me the last couple of nights by coming off the boob on her own, having a bit of a wriggle and drifting off to sleep with me lying next to her :)

Also, while we were on holiday with my parents, DM succeeded in getting her off to sleep a few times by cuddling her to her chest and walking around slowly.

There is hope! :o

tiktok · 01/06/2012 23:40

OP - come back :)

Original poster
appleandplum · 03/06/2012 23:25

Thanks everyone for your replies, this is what i was hoping you would say that it's normal.
Tiktok - yes i am away for 2 nights (a well earned break as this is dc4, eldest 4 and twins 2 but the others didn't seem to do this)
I was also thinking as he will be on solids by then it would be quite different but now august doesn't seem that far away!

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