Breastfeeding at 10 weeks- finding things hard

[Boo100]

I am really new to this breastfeeding game and it is not easy! I am not even sure what I want to ask, maybe just to get reassurance from others who know what they are doing I suppose?

Part of the problem I think is the pressure I have to move onto formula from my family, well my mum. She is great and just worried that I am not getting any sleep and thinks a bottle of hungry baby formula will help him sleep at night. he is still on a feeding frenzy at night. Probably every hr from tea time till 9 or 10 then sleeps until 1 or 2. After that it is about every 1-2 hrs until 7 when I get up. He has had formula as I have had to be away for 4 times and when he still wanted to feed every 2 hrs, this is when she advised hungry baby milk.

This is my third baby btw! I am not a young new mum but feel so emotional about feeding that it is hard. I couldn't feed my first son who came early after a ecsec then was a bit down and also struggled with bf with next baby, so I really wanted to do thingS right this time. HusbAnd is working away in week So it is just me and the kids and I know everyone wants to make sure I am ok.

Ramble ramble.... Basically I need thoughts on when breast feeding settles down, becomes less frequent or even into a bit more of a routine. Noone tells you about the realities of bf do they?! Not sure if this area has support groups, it's not very common to see bf mums anywhere. Is that a regional thing?

Your thoughts will be sincerely appreciated.

Hey, I'm BFing my number three and I totally agree with you aboutthe time it takes, and the juggling when you have two other DCs to deal with too. Firstly I would say whatever you do WELL DONE for getting this far, even if you stopped Bfing today you have succeeded in giving him the feeding that you wanted to, guilt is not appropriate here, you've done a grand job and sacrificed precious sleep to do it.
Secondly, the decision is yours (and a bit your DPs) when you switch to formula or mix feed. Not MILs, not your mums, not the lady on This Morning or the media. I have had the "ooh, if only he took a bottle" line from well meaning relatives (he doesnt even take a EBm bottle!) and have had complete strangers telling me to give him rusks to get more sleep!

I did introduce a 6 oz formula bottle at night for my DD2 at 12 weeks, and that sat in her tummy a bit longer I think, didn't make er sleep through though! With my current DS we were getting a better routine by 10 weeks, he was going from 8-3 and then feeding at 3 and 6 which was fine until he went back to 3 hourly overnights at 4 months! So every baby os different, I'm afraid. Work out what you feel is the best compromise, do that, and stick to your guns. You sounds like you're doing extremely well to me.

I just deleted a really long response so I'll try again!

I found the first 3 or 4 months tricky. Co-sleeping really helped me get more sleep. It can be safe provided you follow the guidelines.

Do you have a good relationship with your Mum? Could you talk to her about it?
Maybe something like Mum I really want to try to breastfeed for as Long as I want. I know that you are trying to be helpful suggesting formula but it make me feel bad. However I know you are really good at_(baking cake, making food that can be eaten one handed, taking other two to the park while i have an afternoon nap, getting bargains at Tesco's/choose me good books) and if you could do that for me for the next week/month/year it would really help me to feel more rested.

good luck

The feeding pattern you describe sounds normal. Mine all fed as frequently as this. It won't last I promise you.

You have to ignore your mum if you want to keep on bf. I would probably tell my mum to shut up and that she doesn't know what she's talking about but you may prefer to be less robust.

You need to maintain confidence in your own body. Can you not ring la leche league or another bf group and hopefully they will be able to set your mind at rest.

I second co sleeping by the way. I don't know how mums who don't co sleep manage, personally speaking!

That made me laugh, Thanks. It is reassuring to hear this is normal and nice to hear something other than sleeping through the night anecdotes! I am co sleeping and have done since about day 2. out of interest how do you manage the duvet question? I have just been looking for a cosleeping cot as I have just read the mums net web chat and have started worrying again about over heating.

Why is this feeding pattern not discussed by midwives? Or anyone I know!

:) Glad you are feeling reassured by this thread.

My dc3 is about the same age as yours and I think my nipples are about to fall off after the past couple of nights!

We bedshare-ish. We have a cot with the mattress at the same height as our bed and one side taken off, he does spend a fair bit of time in there. For some reason when he won't settle he prefers to be on the other side of me. When he is in the cot part I wrap the duvet round myself so it doesn't stray into his bit. When he is on the other side the duvet is pulled down and he is on top of it so his feet are on top of the duvet but as it is pulled down his torso and head are on the bottom sheet, my pillows are pushed up high and I have my arm between his head and the pillows.

I have no idea why it isn't talked about by MWs. I'm a bf peer supporter and I go along to ante natal bf sessions at the hospital and they NEVER bring up cluster feeding etc so I always have to try to get it in without treading on toes!

Boo, my dd always cluster fed at night, it felt like she was never off me at night but it does calm down, one thing i have to keep telling myself is so many mums and babies have experienced the same but you do manage. i had pressure to ff from my fella and his family as i had bad time in the early weeks but after the first 3 months it gets to be a nice thing. I thought giving formual as well as boob affected your milk supply? your boobs will always make enough for your baby as i was led to believe. the more they suck the more you make. my friends milk dried up when she introduced a bottle as well.
baby bay of amazon £100 best thing i ever bought - makes co sleeping a dream (if you have time to dream when not feeding!!). no one talks about co sleeping in real life do they but soooo many people do!!

We used a cot bed with one side off pushed up against the bed. To get around duvet issue. DS is in a grow bag on top of the duvet. I then angle the duvet so a corner is behind my head. This keeps my back warm but not to much excess fabric near DS.

hi - another cosleeper here - it's amazing how obsessed people are with 'sleeping through the night'. I really don't give a fig if mine sleeps through or not. She doesn't, she's pretty much the same as yours: feeds a lot until 10/11pm and then goes through to 2am, then 5, then 7and so on. Because of the co sleeping though, it doesn't bother me and i feel I'm getting plenty of sleep. I don't generally tell people about the cosleeping, but am keen to get in the fact that I'm really fine about her not sleeping through and don't feel I'm missing too much sleep, but they will literally ignore me and carry on wittering about needing to get her sleeping through.

Most people seem keen to drop the nighttime feeds - I'm way more keen to wean during the day so I can get on with my work, nighttime is absolutely fine