Need some support - tell me this is normal?

[sweetkitty]

DD2 is 3 weeks old and a little gannet (she's 11lb 2ozs)! So far BFing has been going well think it's because I know what I'm doing this time, she latched on brilliantly and after the first few days nipples have been great.

The problem is she is only happy when she has her mouth round a nipple. She constantly wants to be fed, she will get up have a good feed, change, feed from the other side, drop off, then when I go to put her down she'll wake and want feeding again. If she is awake she will want feeding, even tried a dummy which will work for a little while but she gets cross sucks on it so hard she spits it out.

Last night she was up feeding on and off from the afternoon only napping for a maximum of 30 mins. I was totally exhausted but couldn't go to sleep as she was still feeding. Even when she has had enough she fusses on and off. I have an 18 month old too so need to put her down occasionally and DP is getting really frustrated as he cannot comfort her if I go for a shower etc. Good thing is though after her 10-11pm feed she is going through with only a little feed in the night until 9am.

DD1 was completely different I had to remember to feed her every 3 hours, she would feed for 10 mins and that would be her. I know all about cluster feeding and growth spurts and know it's only a phase but it's so hard when all she wants to do is suck my boobs. Have expressed some milk this morning going to try a bottle tonight see if it makes any difference.

Anyone else experienced this?

I haven't sweetkitty but you're about to fall of the active thread list so thought I'd bump you up. I'm sure someone will be able to offer some help/reassurance. Hang in there.

My dd was a bit like this but she did seem to settle into more of a feed, sleep etc routine after a very few weeks. You could try a sling with her as I hear you can bf while baby is in the sling and you are hoovering (or not). Try googling Dr Sears who has loads of advice. Good luck. xx

For a 3 week old baby to be sleeping such long hours at night, she would have to be making up for her milk intake during the day. Most newborn babies would be feeding fairly regularly through the night.

I suppose you would need to decide which is more important to you. If you want to have a bit more of a break during the day, you would need to wake her up in the night for more feeds.

I also agree with the sling comment - if she really just wants your contact, this could be the solution.

yes, all mine were like this,only one out of the four settled down after feeding for a couple of hours.3 weeks is still very young though, i'd say its pretty normal.

yikes, I have no clue but I instantly thought cluster feeding? Is there a growth spurt at 3 weeks?

Contraversial - could you try a dummy at night?

I'm sorry - I don't thing I'm being much help

sweetkitty - this is normal, it will pass, and it is good she feeds a lot in the day and gets comfort from you, when she is feeding so little in the night.

I don't understand why trying a bottle of ebm at night will help. She sleeps and settles fine at night.

It's hard while it lasts but fighting it makes it worse!

Sweetkitty - you just described my DS to a tee. I was reading stuff with dismay about feeding every four hours etc and I wasn't even able to tell where one feed ended and the next begun. Nothing would pacify DS other than the boob and it was definitely hunger rather than just looking for comfort.

He's now 16 weeks. He sleeps 12 hours at night and naps for 4 hours during the day. Feeding times are short and spaced out throughout the day.

He stopped the non stop feeding all of a sudden around 9 weeks and (I thought there was something wrong with him, but no he was just fine) and it just got better and better from there.

Hang on in there SK.

HTH

MY first was like that, evenings were spent constantly swapping from one boob to the other untill about 10 then he would sleep till 6am. Admittedly that was easier to cope with as didn't have another one to take care of, it will get easier and spread out soon I'm sure. Why not use the expressed milk for when you have shower etc to make it easier for your dp?

I only have one baby, so limited experience - but for what it's worth, I found our DS often simply wanted the comfort of something to suck on. Will your LO be happy with your partner's little finger?

Best of British. It's hard work, but in a few weeks you'll be able to look at your chubby bonny baby and say "I did that"!!

It sounds like your dd is finding her own rhythm and just needs comfort just now. As long as she is healthy, you could just follow her lead and let her grow out of it. However, there is nothing wrong with trying to help her through it by using a dummy or bottle. She may not need them for long.

I had this a bit with my dd and it turned out her tummy bothered her and the sucking I guess helped. It didn't last too long and she never became dependant on the dummy.

sweetkitty,mine was exactly the same.
It will pass.
You are doing such a good job and must fell very proud.
I think your dp and you just need to grin and bear it when you really need to get on with stuff.Otherwise,his efforts would be best directed into waiting on you and keeping the toddler entertained.
Have you tried a little battery operated bouncy chair?

I'm deeply suspicious of baby paraphernalia,but it gave me some much needed time to myself.

I would also feed a little more at night-might make a difference as it seems to me she is making up for that very loooong stretch whe she has no milk.

SK, sorry to hear you're finding it hard - DS2 is very similar to your DD2. He feeds often, especially during the day and has just begun to settle down again after the three-week growth spurt. I will hit the next person who asks if he's feeding four-hourly and sleeping through yet.

It's bloody hard with DS1 needing entertaining too (although we went to a music group this morning and he spent half of it sitting on my lap, a quarter of it getting cross with the musical instruments and the last bit going over to the door and saying "Home? Fifi?" (he's a big flowertot fan!) to me Still, it got us out of the house!

Stick with it. It WILL get better. But I know how hard it is and I expect you to tell me to stick with it when I'm getting overwhelmed by the constant demands of two very young children (which I am) xxxxxxxxxx

Thanks fof the replies.

Feel better today think yesterday was one of those days, I had a headache and felt sick and just wanted to sleep so bad but couldn't because of attached child.

tiktok - the thinking behind the EBM was so DP could give her some milk in the evening whilst I have a shower or bath.

DP thinks we should stick with using a dummy but I'm not so sure she's never overly keen on it although she is a v sucky baby. I have got one of those motorised swing things which does work occasionally.

I think thats the thing hunker - I feel like all I do is feed DD2 and when she is not feeding run around getting everything else done and neglecting DD1 almost. She is such a good little thing as well quite content to play by herself but she needs my attention too.

Thanks everyone else think I just needed people to say it's normal and it will settle down. I'm very much for letting her find her own routine and feed her when she wants it.