wean before birth of dc2 or tandem feed.

[PogoBob]

Looking for some advice from more experienced breastfeeders.

DD is 21mo and a bit of a milk monster. I was planning of working towards weaning around her 2nd birthday. I'm now unexpectedly pregnant and due when DD will be 2y 4mo.

I realise there's no set answer but from your experience how likely is DD to want to re-start bf'ing when she sees her sibling feeding, given she would have probably only stopped around 3 months before hand (assuming to actually gives in a lets me wean her!!)

I'm willing to keeping feeding her and then tandem feeding after the birth if that will minimise the stress and upheavel for her, I'm just not sure what is the best bet as she still wakes for milk 3 times a night and will happily miss meals and fill up on milk instead so think there could be benefit in weaning, at least to some degree.

Thanks and sorry if I don't answer straight away, bedtime for DD!!

I think that if she had stopped for three months then she wouldn't necessarily want to feed again, that is quite a long time for such a little one.

I tandem fed, my DS was twenty months when DD was born but I had night weaned him, so only had a morning feed to contend with, as well as the occasional comfort feed during the day. He did feed more when DD arrived and I think it helped in terms of coping with him as he was a lively boy.

What about night weaning your DD as an alternative option? I wouldn't fancy being up in the night for a newborn as well as a toddler, they might not wake at the same time

I night weaned DS by sending DH in with a beaker of milk. Didn't do sleep training as such, but DH had a few very disturbed nights.

Thanks Humphrey Night-weaning is at the top of the list of things to try and conquer. Only issue is we co-sleep so sending DH in is a little more challenging! Am sure there must be a solution though so will focus on that first

Hi there,

How pregnant are you? My DS was a big milk monster but he weaned quite gradually during my pregnancy (currently 25 weeks) and we stopped altogether one month ago. We did have about a week of unsettled nights when he was trying to feed but there wasn't much milk and he was frustrated, but then he just stopped trying. I was surprised it happened so smoothly TBH.

We also co-sleep, but found he just became less interested once my milk supply began to drop. One welcome side effect is he now generally wakes once a night rather than three or four, so we have moved him into his own room, then he joins us when he wakes for the rest of the night.

Whether he will express an interest in milk once the new baby is born remains to be seen, but he seems to have forgotten about bf quite quickly.

I had DD when DS was 2y4 and tandem fed. It's a trade off - I disagree with whoever says your older one will forget, I think DS would ahve remembered and pestered me.
Feeding meant I still got one on one time with him and he got to do something with me he'd done all his life and that was extremely important to him. It also meant DH had to have some 1-1 time with DD and figure out a way to soothe her - all other times it seemed to be me with the baby and him with the toddler, so this helped breach the divide. I like to think it helped with sibling rivalry.
OTOH it meant bedtimes went on and on and on - DS used to have very long feeds. I also started to feel very touched out (only just getting over this now, and he is five) and so strongly encouraged him to stop when he was 4 :( I would have like to let him self wean, but he was showing no signs of it, and I ahve no doubt he would still be feeding now. Which is fine in general, but not for me.

Oh and feeding them both together was logistically difficult - I did it now and again - but probably that alone made it all worthwhile, looking down at them both quiet and happy, holding hands :)

Thanks both.

Wasp DD is a major milk monster but I am only 7 weeks pregnant (I like planning ahead!) so hopefully plenty of time for her to self wean.

stealth I'm already struggling slightly balancing neusea with DD's desire to feed for hours at bedtime so totally understand what you say about being touched out.

I am leaning toward going with the flow and seeing what happens, not sure if I could manage feeding both at once though, DD is fab at feeding from any position but I have a rather generous chest and had a few nightmares latching DD on as a newborn as she could fit enough of my nipple/areola in her mouth. Suspect I will need a clear run to latch on baby number 2