Struggling today... reassurance please.

[scrumdiddlydoo]

My LO is 18 weeks today and his feeding and sleeping is all over the place. He has hardly fed at all today despite me offering the boob frequently and when he has fed I don't feel like he is getting a full feed. This wouldnt be so bad, but for the last week he has woken every 2 hours in the night and I am just exhausted. I can't figure out if he is genuinely hungry, whether this is the dreaded 4 month regression or whether he is just feeding for comfort. Don't really know what I'm asking, I just feel crap today and can't stop thinking about all those wonderful babies who sleep through the night. How can I get him to feed more during the day? I'm sure this is impacting on his night wakings. Any words of encouragement out there? Actually, sod the words and just give me the wine and chocolate.

My ds is very similar. What I've never been able to understand is how on earth to make him feed more in the day when he's so sure about when he does and does not want to feed- I.e. really crying and turning away when I offer him the boob and he doesn't want it. And if it's any encouragement at all we had a good few days of every 2 hour wakings last week but he's gone back to his 3 or 4 a night now (which isn't great I know but better at least). Ds is also 18 weeks by the way. Have you read the Information on the isisonline.org.uk website by the way? Someone linked it on another thread I was reading earlier today and although it's bit practical advice about how to change things or anything like that, I do find it reassuring to read about how normal these kind of sleep habits are.

I will have a read, thankyou. My LO is exactly the same, crying and turning head away from boob. My worry is that he feeds so frequently during the night that he just isn't that hungry during the day! I also feel like he is getting easily distracted when he does feed, have tried feeding in a quiet room etc but doesn't make any difference! It's just so hard to constantly think that I'm doing something wrong and that if I were to do things differently, he may start to sleep for longer!

Oh, I will join in if I may, on the basis that the more of us come clean about our crappy sleepers the less weird we will feel! DD is only 15 weeks but has been at this since 13 weeks. Very hard to get enough milk into her during the day and it is v frustrating! My chocolate consumption is through the roof.

another uber-fussy feeder here, also 18wks old, showing normal hunger cues but then crying and turning head away from boob. Have resorted to darkened room when I've had to, she is distracted by coughs, sighs from other occupants of the room. Had to feed her in the car at weekend when we were out for lunch and then in FIL's bedroom afterwards,. I'm finding it tough, going to a LLL meeting tomorrow for some moral support. I hated taking her to the car, I've never had a problem feeding in public, makes me feel like I'm hiding away. Not giving up though, just finding it tough

I am currently rocking her to sleep but she's still an owl baby, wide awake. Cried and fought on boob. What to do?

The more the nerdier, ha, meant merrier stupid predictive text! About to eat my body weight in doughballs to get me through the night. Have also resorted to stocking bedside cabinet with chocolate brioche! All the people who say their LO's sleep through are just lying aren't they? Oh well, as the mantra goes, this too shall pass!

But why is it that I only ever seem to speak to people in RL (e.g. all of my NCT group etc) who have ultra good sleepers? So just when I manage to convince myself that his sleeping really is normal and natural I start to question it again. Though we were talking about it the other day and saying how they had all been sleepy newborns, and ds was very wakeful even as a newborn so I have started to think that it must just sort of be part of his personality. We're any of your LO's wakeful as newborns too?

My only saving grace is that getting my LO to sleep is easy so I am so thankful for that, it's the continual waking that does my head in. I really struggled to get breastfeeding established and had massive oversupply issues. I don't want to give it up at all but sometimes it is just so tough. I guess I can't see an end to it and having the constant 'he still doesn't sleep through?' comments are hard to deal with.

I don't know if other people in RL are lying or just lucky. If it weren't for the internet I would be going insane with worry. Also I think that sometimes people (grandparents etc) just forget what it was really like? So when they do catsbum faces about sleep etc they are only doing it because they have blocked out the memory! That's my theory anyway.
My baby has been hyper alert from the start so maybe it is also a personality thing.

Gosh scrumdiddlydoo we really have had similar experiences. Did you read that other thread that was up earlier today called something like 'Truthfully will he sleep longer with formula' though because nearly all the replies were from people who tried e.g. a bedtime bottle, and nearly all of them said it hadn't worked. So I really think it unlikely that it's related to the feeding, we just happen to have LO's that prefer to be awake it seems!

ag I haven't had more than 4 hours continual kip since my DS was born so yep, even as a newborn he wasnt that sleepy! Just the way he is I guess, *crosses fingers with the hope that wakefulness is linked to being a genius.

Yep, I did read that thread and it did make me feel a bit better as it seems like there is no miracle answer! Not that my DS would take a bottle, but that's a whole other story!!

Oh I'd just like to share dh's really helpful advice: 'Just don't feed him when he wakes up then he'll have to eat more in the day' ... Right thanks for that incredibly insightful advice darling- I really think that might be the answer!

Oh, I sooo wish it was that easy!

ag123, my partner has come out with some really unhelpful suggestions too, i think men have to try and fix things dont they, they cant just say oh dear, poor you and leave it.
my dd went through this phase as scrum describes, you wonder what the hell is going on and feel crap and worry etc and then a few weeks later youre into a different phase!! mine fed every hour one night literally as soon as she finished i put her down and she was asking for more 45mins-1 hour later. i was exhausted think it was a growth spurt.
scrum, dont worry--- sit there feeding, eating your dough balls and think of all us other mums sat up at the same odd hours doing the same!!
we are 23 weeks today, still feed 3 times a night some nights.
persevere, you are doing brilliantly, give yourself a pat on the back. ignore all the "mine sleeps through the night" stories (im sick of the why dont you give her a bottle comments).