Argh what should I do???

[Gina1981]

I had DD weighed this morning and at 24wks is a healthy 8.9kg (19lbs 9oz). When I went through our daily routine with the HV, she said that DD is having too many feeds in a day (10-12) and at 24wks she should be havbing around 6 feeds! The majority of those feeds she falls asleep on me!! Lets say that 7-8 of those feeds last for 30-40 mins where she sleeps, then wakes up and doesnt sleep independantly! HV said DD is getting use to this and I need to change our habits! I must admit because of this I get nothing done and don't have a life!!!

DD is still waking up at night for feeds which the HV said that she would expect it to be only once a night!

HV suggested that the moment i see that DD is tired that i put her in her cot without feeding her despite that she was due a feed! However DD did fall asleep for 45 mins but woke up very grumpy! For the next 2 hrs DD was very unsettled. It had been 3hrs since her last feed but DD was so frustrated she wouldn't feed! It took 2 hrs to finally get her to have a feed and then she fell asleep on the breast!! Since then she has been very difficult to feed etc.

So I guess what my question is do i carry on and perserve with it or do I carry on with what I have been doing? We are going to start weaning in a couple of weeks so i'm guessing things will begin to change again then too!

Anyone been in a similar situation and if so any advice would be greatly appreciated?

TIA

You aren't doing ANYTHING wrong. Carry on doing it your and your baby's way. Honestly, these bloody health visitors should be sent for mass retraining. It seems about 80% of the advice they give out is complete and utter clap trap. At least the ones I hear about anyway. Sorry if that sounds harsh but that's my and many of my friends' experience.

Hi i ebf my son on demand 24/7 usually 24 hours,we co slept it worked for us. Basically you keep doing in my opinion what works for you and your baby and forget about the health visitor suggestions she is just going by her book and sees you once a week or so.

your HV is a plum.

i think you were probably getting on fine before she stressed you out!

Agree with previous posters.

If you're happy with the way you are doing things then keep doing it that way.

None of the HV's business- unless you'd asked for her opinion of course.

:( :( Gina.....what a shame your HV has not recognised how to support and encourage you....

Agree with all the other posters!

What you are doing works and you have had so many ups and downs since your baby came, that you need a cheer leading team, not someone who tells you you are doing things 'wrong' (as if there is anything 'wrong' with what you are doing).

Thank you for all your replies!! HV can make you feel like such a failure sometimes. She pretty much implied that I had made a rod for my own back!! I guess I've done things the way I have to make my life easier! Ideally yes I'd like a baby that feeds then I can put her fir her nap but DD just doesn't want to be like that!! Do many babies behave that way?? I felt like my DD was the only one that wasn't " normal" so to speak!!! Why does everything have to be text bool these days!!

Well done in the weight gain gina! Clearly you must be doing it right otherwise your DD wouldn't be thriving lie she is!

Just another vote for ignoring the HV gina.

My son still ate about eight times in the night at that age. I'd love to have seen the health visitor who could have restricted him to one feed a night and survived with her eardrums and sanity intact....

He did that till 16 months. Now at 20 months, he is child able to sleep in his own bed without feeds. He just needed a long run-up at his own pace. Do what works for you!

What utter tosh from that HV.

My DD is 23 weeks tomorrow and no way does she only have six feeds a day and it is extremely rare that she has only one night feed a night as well. And that weight sounds tremendous! :)