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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

I think my 2yo wants to wean - I dont!

24 replies

harrisey · 11/02/2006 20:43

My 2y3m dd2 has refused her morning and evening breastfeeds for the last 3 days. These are the only ones she has now, normally, and every time I offer she pats my boob and says 'mummy mok all finished!'. There is plenty of milk (leaking!) and she is thirsty/hungry asking for 'cup mok' and 'bekkie' (breakfast) quite soon afterwards.
I dont want to stop yet, she is my last baby and I love bf.
Could it be my period changing the taste or something (the 2 things did coincide). SHe's never complained before though?
Should I keep on offering or let her ask when she wants it (she is good at asking 'more mummy mok NOW pleeeeeese' when we are out etc.
And yes, she is also a precocious talker - does my head in !!!

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 11/02/2006 20:48

I think she's trying to tell you something. How about donating milk to premature infants to keep your supply up and satisfy your maternal instinct.

kama · 11/02/2006 20:50

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lockets · 11/02/2006 20:58

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misdee · 11/02/2006 20:59

i think you can only donate if baby is under 6months tho. (fastasleep wil know).

beansprout · 11/02/2006 21:07

Misdee is right.

expatinscotland · 11/02/2006 21:08

Aw!

Still, sounds like she's wanting to wean. It'd be cruel to force her when she's telling you she doesn't want it.

koalabear · 11/02/2006 21:17

expat - lovely suggestion, and very much needed, especially for the prem babies

Original poster

harrisey · 11/02/2006 21:24

Thanks ladies. Its what I think is happening and I have to go with what she wants.
I'd love to donate but (1) I'm sure misdee is right you have to have a baby under 6 months as the milk changes when they get older and (2) anyway there is no milk bank in my area (remote rural Scotland, no facilities for prem babies anyway.

Thanks for the thoughts - I'll just have to get used to it.

OP posts:

misdee · 11/02/2006 21:28

can you expressit into a cup for her?

FrannyandZooey · 11/02/2006 21:31

I don't think offering is 'forcing', how did the word 'forcing' come into the equation? You can no way force a child to breastfeed if she doesn't want it, however IMO it is fine to offer at times when she would normally have had some anyway. Toddlers are contrary and fickle little people, and she may find that next week she quite fancies it after all.

Meanwhile keep yourself comfortable by expressing a little when you need to, and take care of yourself - it is an emotional time when your child doesn't want to feed, as it feels like a rejection of your love, plus you are not getting all the good breastfeeding chemicals that were flowing round your veins a few days ago. Good luck with working it out between the two of you - and still can't work out how anyone thought you were trying to "force" her [frown]

lockets · 11/02/2006 21:35

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FrannyandZooey · 11/02/2006 21:41

Maybe not. I think saying it was "cruel" to "force" her was one comment. I would be upset if someone implied I was forcing my child to breastfeed, by offering milk.

Original poster

harrisey · 12/02/2006 01:03

I didn't feel forced!
I think I will continue to offer (as in 'do you want some mummy milk' at the normal times for her feeds for a week or two in case she is just going through a phase or it is something hormonal with me or something.
After 3 children fed till age 2 I do know you can never force a child to bf, but it is equally cruel to force one to stop if they are not ready (poor ds had to stop when I was 6 months preg with dd2 as it was just too sore - poor kiddy, he was heartbroken!)

It helps that she can articulate whet she wants, or doesn't want.

But I am still sad at stopping, especially as I shan't be doing it again (unless the vasectomy fails hahahaha)

OP posts:

mszebra · 12/02/2006 08:48

I thought that there was no age limit on milk donors, but "they" keep changing the rules, so maybe.

I didn't live near a milk bank, either, but I froze what I could express and sent it in a cooler every couple of months with a friend to the nearest milk bank.

Harrisey Remember that breastfeeding is a relationship. Takes two of you to want to make it work, and all that. I understand the sadness... I am both looking forward to and sad about weaning my DS2 (also my last).

Original poster

harrisey · 12/02/2006 22:57

Now I'm all engorged and sore.
Any tips? Should I express or will that make things worse?
Cold cabbage leaves at the ready???

OP posts:

FrannyandZooey · 12/02/2006 23:02

Express enough to keep yourself comfortable or you could get a blockage or something. It's going to be a slow process, there's no need to go cold turkey.

Hope you are feeling ok.

bobbybobbobbingalong · 12/02/2006 23:08

I think you can donate for as long as you want but you have to start before baby is 6 months old - I have no idea why though.

Original poster

harrisey · 14/02/2006 14:29

Well, thats a week adn a half now and she is still saying no when I ofer so I have decided to stop offering. She knows where it is if she wants it until things dry up.
She has taking to stroking my boobs and saying 'nice nice Mummy mok all finished' - her way of saying thanks maybe?

Its been a ball, feeding all 3 kids and giving them that great start in life, but time to move on now. Thanks for your support over this, I know I sound like a weakling wanting to carry on but it truly has been fun. I've been either pg or bf for almost 7 years, so this is the first time in all this time a kid hasn't been physically dependent on me.

Time now to lose some weight and buy some nice new underwear, I think!

OP posts:

ProfessorGrammaticus · 14/02/2006 15:26

Yes it is - reclaim your body for yourself and enjoy it, knowing you have doen your best for your kids.

FrannyandZooey · 14/02/2006 18:37

Aw harrisey, what a great experience for both of you, that you have allowed her to feed for as long as she wanted. I am sure you have conflicting emotions right now, but I would just like to say that when my ds weans, I hope it will be as gentle and natural as it has been for your dd

bobbybobbobbingalong · 14/02/2006 19:07

It's just so lovely to miss out on weaning being hard work isn't it?

Well done harrisey.

Original poster

harrisey · 14/02/2006 23:55

Thanks ladies. I have a wee tear in my eye thinking about it, but if it is right for her, then it is right for me too. When I remember the trouble I had with the other two - having to wean months into the next pregnancy as I was ill and run down by it, milk drying up all of a sudden and especially ds headbanging my chest and crying cos there just wasnt anything there (wish I'd known about MN then!!), its lovely to have seen the nursing relationship all the way through to its natural conclusion.
Dd2 cuddled up to me and drank her 'cup mok' at bedtime and was happy and content. Thats what matters!
Where can you buy nice bras for the well endowed woman, that's my next quest, when I stop leaking!!!

OP posts:

FrannyandZooey · 15/02/2006 07:56

Ah harrisey, I wouldn't know about that personally but I hear Rigby and Peller is the place to go. If you are still well-endowed after 7 years of pregnancy and breastfeeding then respect to you!

harpsichordcarrier · 15/02/2006 08:15

harrisey for you but what a wonderful experience and fabulous that she has self weaned
Bravisimmo is the way to go for the larger norked lady
Figleaves has some nice things too
HC xx

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