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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Waking because hungry or for comfort?

9 replies

Ashappyaslarry · 22/04/2012 08:08

Hi. My DS is 5 months. Prior to the dreaded 4 month sleep regression he used to have a dream feed around 10/11pm and then wake around 4/5am for another feed. Since coming out the other end of the 4 month sleep regression we seem to have lost all sense of consistency. I still give him his dream feed around the same time but he can now wake at anytime from 2am. He's still only waking the once though.

But my question is how can I be sure he's waking from hunger? Before i feed him I check all other possibilities, especially if it's an earlier wake; such as can he just be resettled, teeth, nappy etc. unusually though I have to take him out of his cot and eventually end up feeding as the tears escalate. BUT. When he first wakes he often doesnt show sign of hunger. For example, different sounding cry, crying stops and starts, doesn't suck on finger. I'm also struggling to tell when feeding turns into suckling, but it definately does and at the point I realise I have to take him off. Sometimes by then he's asleep, sometimes awake but drowsy.

Also he's started to wake up at about 6am. He's still tired and grumpy so not interested in toys, but can't be resettled without a battle, but also not showing signs of hunger. But in the end I again end up feeding and 80% of the time he drops back off, either during or straight after feed.

Am I comfort feeding my ds back to sleep?

Also Dh fed ds breastmilk via the bottle last night, as a rest to see if he'd take it (never done bottle night feed before). By the time he'd warmed the bottle ds has fallen asleep on him. He gave him the bottle anyway but he only had about 4 1/2 - 5 oz....which seemed low to me, making me think he's really not waking because he's hungry.

OP posts:
EauRouge · 22/04/2012 08:35

Nigh-waking at 5 months is completely normal :) Waking only once is pretty good going!

How do you feel about the way things are, are you happy to feed him back to sleep? There's nothing wrong at all with 'comfort feeding', you are not forming bad habits, making a rod for your own back or any of that nonsense- so if you are happy nursing him back to sleep then carry on! Whatever works for you and your DS.

There are so many reasons why a baby might wake up- hunger, fear, too hot, too cold, thirsty, needs a cuddle etc etc- breastfeeding can help with all these.

Nighttime Parenting by Dr Sears is a really good book about baby sleep habits if you want to read more about how and why babies sleep the way they do. Also this website is really good.

Gina1981 · 22/04/2012 08:47

I'm in exactly the same boat at the mo. DD didn't settle till 11.00pm then woke up at 1.15am, 4.30am, 5.50am and then 7.40am! All times I've had to feed her back to sleep! She is feeding as I type and sleeping too!! There are times where DH has been able to get her back to sleep but wakes up within minutes so she clearly is hungry or thirsty! I just hope this starts to get better as I'm a walking zombie at the mo!!

Your not alone :)

MigGril · 22/04/2012 08:53

Most breastfeeds are only around 4oz so for him to take 4 1/2 - 5oz is a whole feed for a breasfed baby.

I think the only way you can see if he's not hungery is if you send in your DH to settal without milk if he goes back to sleep and doens't wake any ealier then he wasn't hungery. But if he only settels for a short time then he probably was.

Agree with other posters also that wakeing during the night at this age is totatly normal and regarless of why he's waking if giving him milk gets him back of to sleep with little fuss then why resist it. Remeber breastmilk containes sleepy hormones which will help him fall asleep this is biologicaly normal.

tiktok · 22/04/2012 09:08

Straight answer is: it could be hunger, or comfort, or a mix of both, and sometimes one and sometimes the other :)

Bottom line is it doesn't matter a jot. Your baby is normal and needs bf in the night - making it easier for yourself is the best way :)

It's not something to puzzle about, really.

Ashappyaslarry · 22/04/2012 09:56

Thanks for your replies. It's not that I'm expecting him to sleep through, I'm not at all, and I know that if I don't feed him at 2am, he'll wake again at 4 for a feed because he doesn't sleep through....those nights are a rare luxury and I'm usually start awake at 4am anyway staring at his cot checking he's ok!! Smile

I suppose I am just worried that by feeding him when he wakes, if it's not for food it will reinforce going to sleep with feeding. He settles really well at bedtime. Always after a feed but quite often awake, sometimes asleep. Also during his 4 month development growth I would be able to settle him without feeds (thank god)...Gina you have my complete sympathies!!!

Rouge, I am happy to feed him as I am i suppose, as long as I'm not creating bad habits as you say, and that's my fear. I guess I'm worried that instead of encouraging him to slowly go longer during Thanks for your replies. It's not that I'm expecting him to sleep through, I'm not at all, and I know that if I don't feed him at 2am, he'll wake again at 4 for a feed because he doesn't sleep through....those nights are a rare luxury and I'm usually start awake at 4am anyway staring at his cot checking he's ok!! Smile

I suppose I was just worried tvar by feeding him when he wakes, of it's not for food with reinforce going to sleep with feeding. He settles really well at bedtime. Always after a feed but quite often awake, sometimes asleep. Also during his 4 month development growth I would be able to settle him without feeds at every wake (thank god)...Gina you have my complete sympathies!!!

Rouge, I am happy to feed him as I am
I suppose, as long as I'm not creating bad habits as you say, and that's my fear. I guess I'm worried that instead of encouraging him to slowest go longer during the night so we are working towards him sleeping through, I'm instead encouraging a reliance on the breast to go back to sleep.

Migirl, where do you get that a breast feed is so little? Is that really correct? When we feed ds via the bottle (rarely as only just started) he takes a good 7oz plus a top up from me as we usually run out!!'

OP posts:
Ashappyaslarry · 22/04/2012 10:01

Tiktok thanks...,I started my last post before breakfast! [smike] I think it probably is a mix of both. I keep telling myself to not worry about things, make it easy for now and deal with anything she's later....but then all the things you read in those bloody books keep haunting me....saying 'you'll regret it later'!!!!! I know, books are full of crap!!! I don't know why i read them, I just torment myself!!!

OP posts:
guendalina · 22/04/2012 10:38

I heard other mums who feed them ebm say that they take much more than with a regular breastfeed because it flows with less effort and babied don't realise they're drinking that much. Hope someone will correct me if I'm wrong and this is myth!
My 4 month still wakes twice at least. If anything he's waking up more now than he was a month ago! It's not too bad for me because we cosleep and he goes back to sleep while feeding so I don't even need to get up. I do think that he's genuinely hungry most of the time anyway otherwise he wouldn't swallow my milk so quickly!
I'd be interested in knowing where McGill found out about bf babies only taking 4 oz each feed too because that would explain why my DS can't do without the night feeds and why, in my case, he's only gaining 3oz per week.

guendalina · 22/04/2012 10:41

Sorry MigGril not McGill Blush

MigGril · 23/04/2012 11:43

It's on the kellymom website I would link it but it's not working right now.

Basicly the amount of milk that a baby takes per feed increases untill around 1months and between 1month and 6months it then level's out to around 4oz per feed (there will be some variation in this). When a baby has a growth spurt and feeds more often what seem to happen is it triggers your body to change the compersition of the milk you make so when they seatle down again they are still taking the same volume but the milk has changed to meet there growing needs.

It's intersting because ovusly formula doen't change so as they get bigger they need more volume to take more calleries. But this isn't the case with BM in fact the milk you produce for a one year old is much fattyer then that for a newborn. Fasinating stuff really.

It is far easier for them to get milk out of a bottle and once they start sucking they get into a cycle and can't stop, therefore take more milk before the realise they are full. (think of you eating a meal if you eat it fast you can sometimes still feel hungery but if you eat slowly you generaly eat less as your brain has time to tell you your full). It's possibly why the link between obisity and BOTTLE FEEDING is there it doesn't matter what is in the bottle stuties have found that even babies fed ebm still have this higher risk.

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