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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

My tether is ending, BF any suggestions?

23 replies

Snakeonaplane · 14/04/2012 15:59

16wo dd is BF every30- 45 mins or so for the last 3 days. It seems my let down is on lock down it takes ages to start and she gets so frustrated thrashing around with my nipple still in her mouth so I'm now really sore then when the let down starts she's happy for a couple of minutes and then I can hear it stop I leave her on that side until she gets frustrated (more thrashing, clawing at me etc) and then swap sides where she is happy for another couple of mins but again, the guzzling milk doesn't happen for long and she gets cross and comes off but it easily distracted and usually happy for 30 mins or so before we do it all again. She is usually a good sleeper but her naps are now shorter she never seems milk drunk and last night I put her down at 7.30, usual time. She woke at 22.00 and then didn't go back to sleep until 1.30 lots of fussing, not crying on the breast then rolling away back on etc at about midnight I'd had enough and asked dh to go and get some formula from tesco but he said no as he knew I'd be pissed off today.

I'm so tired, I'm snappy and horrible it's the school holidays and I have a really important exam next week all this feeding feels like it's sucking the life out of me and my nipples are killing and I'm dreading feeding her . She doesn't seem t have thrush this was my first though, she is a chunker she was born on the 50th and is now quite a bit above it and ebf.

I vaguely remember that this is a tough age, but any suggestions as to what I could do?

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Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 14/04/2012 16:01

Should add, she usually has most of her big feeds in the am from about 5 until 8 we co sleep and she has peaceful feeds every 15 mins or so

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Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 00:17

Night 3 of no sleeping and tetchy parents, perhaps she needs topping up? , she doesn't seem particularly interested in bf tonight just squaking.

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5318008 · 15/04/2012 00:38

I wonder if she is upping her feeds as a growth spurt approaches?

Can you take her to bed, do a bit of babymooning, go with the flow tomorrow? Not easy with older children I know

GodisaDJ · 15/04/2012 04:56

Could be 4 month sleep regression (google it)?

I had similar with dd and thought it was to do with my feeding but it wasn't. Dd was growth spurting, teething and generally developing. She stopped sleeping as well too. Her mind was active so she started waking more.

Is she teething? This can also affect how the suckle on nipple and change their normal 'happy' disposition.

Keep persevering if you can for a few days. There is no guarantee that formula will resolve all of the issues you've mentioned.

Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 16:30

Thank you, the 4 month sleep regression stuff is really interesting. She seems pretty satisfied with normal regular feeds today. So I'm guessing possibly a growth spurt coinciding with perhaps regression. When she woke last night she wasn't interested in food just babbling and playing, which any other time would be lovely.

DH is away today, probably a good thing as we're both cranky due to the lack of sleep. I felt like poking him in the eye last night when I was dealing with her and he was sleeping, be Dix eventually get the message and get up and take a turn.

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Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 16:31

*he did

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usingapseudonym · 15/04/2012 17:00

Similar thing happening here - really hoping I'm not getting babe used to feeding every 15mins or so at night :( (co-sleeping too) I cant quite work out how parents who bottle feed manage a similar baby as they wouldn't feed all the time. There must be another way...! First time around I wasn't fussed but this time I cant doze during the day and really need to sleep!

Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 19:16

It's hard isn't it. We started out really well and at about 8 weeks slept through most nights 10 till 5, it was heaven slowly though at 5 I began getting more shattered so kept her in bed with is even though she settled fine back in the cot, it's been a viscous circle the more she wakes the less she goes in the cot, the more she's in bed with me the more she seems to feed. I can cope with all of that but these 3 hour activity sessions at 10 at night are killing me.

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GodisaDJ · 15/04/2012 19:46

She led you in to a false sense of security little mite. Glad to hear it's a little better, still hope yet

I can completely relate to poking dh in the eye I've kicked my dp hard many a nights when he hasn't even flinched at the sound of dd crying.... Then he always wakes up so fresh and says "oooh, she slept well last night didn't she, I didn't hear her?"

To prepare you, my Dd at 8 months, breastfed and BLW, is still having at least 2 feeds each night. More most nights really but I wouldnt class them as 'feeds' just comfort.

From reading up on MN, Internet researching and buying every god dam sleep book, I have concluded that it is in fact normal for children not to 'sleep through' during the first 12 months, sometimes longer. It is always the ones that do sleep through that we hear about (must be a conspiracy !)

usingapseudonym · 15/04/2012 20:34

But but but - then why are there so many whose children do sleep through?

I have the no cry sleep solution but I am far too gone to read coherently. I feel I need to do something now so I don't have to do something harsher when shes older but I don't know what that "something" is.

I can't even let her grizzle in her room as she will be sharing with her sister and will disturb her sister!

5madthings · 15/04/2012 20:49

sounds like 4mth sleep regression combined with a bit of a growth spurt, it will pass!

what things normally help settle her, have you tried swaddling, rocking, i used to lie mine on their sides and pat their bum firmly and shushh them if they didnt want feeding, that woudl sometimes work.

its hit or miss but this too will pass, if it didnt no-one would ever have more than one!

Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 21:05

God I hate to be the bearer of bad news but dd is 7 and is still hit and miss on the full nights and didn't sleep through till she started school .
I know it's normal to wake for feeds but usually they are quiet dark night feeds not rolling, laughing, gurgling, latchingbon latching off etc squeaking, and then complaining when she is put in her cot so as everyone is up. We made a massive mistake the first night, dh hadn't seen her all day so when she woke in such a lovely mood he engaged with her, she was also definitely going through growth spurt that day too.

We have been getting her back to sleep by putting her in the pram and rocking her it seems to work eventually.

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Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 15/04/2012 21:06

5mad I love that saying, this too shall pass. I need to stick it on the fridge

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5madthings · 15/04/2012 21:09

mine are 12, 9, 7, 4 and 16mths, generally they are pretty good, dd the youngest is still in our bed!

ds4 gets up sometimes with a bad dream etc, and ds1 has never been a good sleeper but as he is 12 he can get himself a drink, read etc and will only disturb us if ill, the other 2 boys are good unless ill.

they al vary.

but my ONE rule with babies and toddlers who wake in the night is i am BORING AS FUCK MUMMY! i will cudddle, feed, soothe etc but no lights on, no playing, no fun at all! keep it dark and quiet etc they get the message....eventually!

5madthings · 15/04/2012 21:10

snakeonaplane its my mantra! everything is but a phase....

GodisaDJ · 15/04/2012 21:15

i kept saying my life hadn't changed much since having a baby...how that has now come round to bite me on the arse

Dd does literally feed and go back to sleep during the night, and i too am "boring mummy" - no play, just cuddles, ssh's etc but still, it would be nice to have one sleep through of at least 5 hours!

usingapseudonym · 16/04/2012 10:31

Baby was on breast here about every y30-40 minutes. I am exhausted :( I can't keep this up.

Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 18/04/2012 07:22

Me too and lots of fussing at the breast from 5pm onwards like she isn't getting enough.I'm shattered part of me would love to give her a bottle int the evening another part of me says battle through bit her sleep is getting worse rather than better. I know formula may not change that but it would be nice to be able to give her to somebody else for an hour.

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NotQuiteCockney · 18/04/2012 07:36

Letdown can be delayed by stress. So, unfortunately, if you're stressed about your letdown, that can make it take longer. Yoga breathing and visualisations (either lots of water flowing, or visualising milk spurting out of your nipples) can help with this. Or whatever helps you relax, really.

Breast compression might help with the fussing after the flow has slowed down. This all sounds like normal behaviour (unfortunately!) and not a sign that your supply is low.

usingapseudonym · 18/04/2012 09:12

I'm wondering about bf til 6months and then trying a nightly bottle then when they're going onto other food anyway. . . I know it may not help but anecdotally it seems to for friends. Or I guess it could be that with bottle feeding you don't get into the offering boob cycle.

Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 18/04/2012 09:30

not quite, thanks for that, I had a look on Kelly mom yesterday and that's what it recommended alright so started trying to relax and do deep breathing last night, rather difficult with the nipple whip lash thing going on . she's having her more efficient feeds at night now so of course she has gone from being a relatively good sleeper to a terrible one and my other dc are still on school holidays. I'm shattered, I have a horribly important exam on Monday and I can't even remember what I was doing yesterday , it's a resit I can't fail.

I have ebf till my other 2 for 8 months with solids obviously from 6 months I'd like to do the same for her at least but God it's testing sometimes. I've had different problems with all 3 and tbh when I did introduce it didn't make a difference to their sleep whatsoever, it just meant DH had to deal with it sometimes

This too shall pass, repeat over.

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Original poster

Snakeonaplane · 18/04/2012 09:34

using i think your right about the cycle, dd was a good sleeper but as we have these evening feeding problems it's having a knock on effect on her night sleeping and tbh it's a viscous circle.

Tomorrow I may start expressing and topping her up with that in the evening, I know it's not the best solution to improve supply etc but after a week with no improvement my addled brain can't think of another solution apart from formula

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usingapseudonym · 18/04/2012 17:26

Aww i was holding out that it might get all better at 6 months with a magic bottle ;) I suspect if my daughter has already "learnt" to wake up and such on me every 20mins or so a bottle wont change that. She's not eating because she's hungry but to get back to sleep which I think is the problem. I completely agree with the theory that its not actually a "problem" if you can cope with it as its completely natural, good for baby etc BUT it really is a problem for me now I have 2 kids. I so cant function on this little sleep. zzz.

I have no cry sleep solutlion but havent managed to sit and read it yet. I go to bed as soon as big kid does and the house is a complete state and we're not eating as well as I'd like and and and.... grumpy me today.

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