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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

weaning milk hungry twins at 18 months - how?

4 replies

MamaChocoholic · 09/04/2012 19:47

after the four day weekend, I am fed up of being pawed and mauled almost constantly. I'm also sad because I didn't want our bf relationship to end on such a negative vibe. there have been more tough bits than good bits along the way, but I wish we could've ended on a good bit.

still, to practicalities. ds2 is the most boob attached. he asks constantly, signing, sayin "mi", pulling my top. distraction works for brief periods, offering alternative food/drink generally only for as long as it takes to eat/drink it, if at all. if I say no it results in full blown meltdown from which he will not be comforted. if I offer, then dd will want to latch on the other side. ds2 will have a couple of sucks, all will be well, and he will just want to sit and twiddle the nipple for comfort. if I put it away he'll ask again and we can repeat the above cycle. dd asks herself less often if ds1 isn't already feeding, but once latched, she will happily remain there for an hour.

they are in full time nursery and midweek typically have a big feed before/after breakfast, another on getting home from nursery, and another at bedtime. night time is the worst. ds2 wants to stay attached all night. I co sleep with them from about midnight (dp in another room). he used to be able to self settle, but I think reflux has got worse recently, and he will cough and cry or vomit when he wakes if I don't latch him on right away.

I know I can't wean tomorrow because of the nights. I'm going to try and see the GP this week to see if he can help with the reflux. but how on earth can I do this without causing untold trauma?

OP posts:
MigGril · 10/04/2012 08:09

Is it the clingy ness that is making you want to wean?
It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

You may want to start with night weaning have a read hear kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/weaning-night/

Then you can reasses and see how you feel. Teaching some nursing manners may also be a good tool as well, baby's can often learn these from really early on kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/nursing-manners-2/.

18 months is a very intense age often it's the peak of Separation anxiety, so also waiting a few months untill this phase setels down maybe the answer to. But no reasion why you can night wean and teach nursing manners now.

You don't such a wonderfull job getting to 18months with twins welldone.

DW123 · 11/04/2012 19:11

Hi - I don't have any advice sorry as my twins are only 12 months old and our nighttimes are dreadful but I did want to give some virtual support. You've done an amazing job and it sounds like you have a lot to handle. Is it worth prioritising what needs to change most eg the night feeds or the duration of day feeds?

I'm considering the Jack Newman method of night weaning although I have no idea why they wake up so don't know if it will improve matters. Sorry about the reflux worsening - that must be a nightmare - hope GP can help.

Hope you can come up with a plan soon and get enough space and sleep.

MamaChocoholic · 15/04/2012 13:51

sorry for not getting back to this thread sooner and thanks for takiing the time to reply. links were useful, as is the idea to focus on day-weaning or night weaning first. I think if I could persuade ds2 to have some manners, and could night wean, we would be ok.

I've read about Jay Gordon's method, but I've not seen covered anywhere toddlers who vomit when upset. dd is very loud, so weaning her would be hard on the ears, but doable. I wouldn't like to not be able to cuddle her for comfort though, and once she hits her stride she'll wake ds2 up, who I will have to cuddle upright to avoid vomit, leaving me no arms to comfort dd, which just seems cruel...

thinking about this has at least made me more grateful that we've bf so far. being able to comfort two upset babies at the same time by just lifting a t shirt is pretty easy lazy. I think it also helps having been back at work for a few days too, so I'm not all touched out as much. so, no quick solutions, but at least feeling a bit more positive.

DW - if you see anything specific to Jay Gordon and twins, or have any further insight yourself, I'd love to read it.

OP posts:
DW123 · 15/04/2012 18:49

Hi glad you've had a bit of a break and its helped. I don't have any further info sorry. I'm actually trying to find out if night weaning will actually help mine sleep more as I don't want to switch lots of 10 minute oxytocin assisted feeds for lots of hour long rocking sessions (min time to get either DT1 or DT2 back to sleep).

I have also tried the No Cry Sleep solution technique for self settling. I probably wasn't as consistent as I should have been but basically didn't get past stage 2 of being able to get DT2 into his cot awake.

Anyway - back to you... Hope your plan works - have you seen GP about the reflux? And did they help? It sounds like reducing the pain or discomfort from that might help.

Wish I could offer more info but wishing good luck. Sounds like your babies are very lucky to have you caring so much for them.

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