'if it hurts you're doing it wrong' versus 'some ladies have sensitive nipples'

[silver23]

BFing 2 day old DD and nipples hurt. At BF class they told us 'if it hurts you're doing it wrong, take her off and try again'. But at hospital (currently in after EMCS) the midwives say the latch looks good and 'some ladies have sensitive nipples'.

I'm not hugely inclined to trust hospital MWs, since no two seem to provide the same BF advice, none say anything like in class, and already had one completely inappropriate 'let me give her formula' request at 12 hr old (I asked to try again and 5 min later had sucking DD - she had already shown herself a great feeder in three previous sessions!). But I've also been happy to see what looks like a good latch and DD so apparently satisfied.

The initial sucks hurt like mad, then it tends to settle into sharp pricks - manageable, but I imagine this could get worse as the days go on. My nipple comes out trapezoidal at the end of a feed, like there is one side that is higher than the other. Things I've read suggest maybe not enough breast is getting in? But I don't know how to shove in more - her mouth is so tiny! And the MWs never respond when I report this - but I'm not sure how much to trust them.

So, is the latch wrong or are my nipples just sensitive? At the moment I'm not bothering too much as I want her to feed and with the hospital MWs keeping track I don't want to look like I'm having trouble and get offered formula again. But I'm a little worried I'm setting myself up for more problems by hurting my nipples now, perhaps making later going more difficult. Plus, I want to know for when I get home.

I'm running out the door so can't answer fully but wanted to say most women have an increased sensitivity in their nipples for the first 6 weeks due to hormones.

I'll check back later but I'm sure you'll get some great advice in the meantime.

Also you could ask if they have peer supporters on the ward.

Sorry to hear youre having difficulty. I think it is one of those things that varies from woman to woman. Mine hurt a lot for the forst 2 weeks, then for another 8 but only when he latched on. Here's the advice i got from MWs in Denmark who seem to better trained in this than in the UK (at least thats the impression I get from reading MN!)

Make sure her bottom lip is sticking out.
Make sure that the pair of you are belly to belly.
Try and point nipple to her nose.
Make sure as much of the brown/pink bit is in her mouth as possible.
You might have to squeeze your boob into a point to help get it into her mouth.
If your niples look like lipstick then ask the MWs to check for tongue tie.
Try a variety of positions. Lie down on your side with DD on her side, or rugby ball her.
Could you express a little to get the milk flowing and then put DD on?

I got a teething ring to bite onto when feeding DS because it hurt. It DID get better, it doesn't hurt anymore, although my nipples still look like lipstick, but he is bang on the 50th centile so not at all worried.

Good luck

silver - be honest with the midwives. Make it clear you do not want them to offer formula, but to resolve your positioning and attachment....if they cannot make things more comfortable for you, ask if there is an infant feeding adviser or someone with more bf skills.

Meantime, try biological nurturing/laid back breastfeeding which allows your baby to take the initiative.

It sounds from your post that your baby needs to open wider - you might try waiting for the gape and bringing your baby on at the height of it, as well as trying BN.

Ok, well it sounds as though your latch is not quite right since the nipple is coming out lipstick shaped. I would ask for someone to sit through the feed with you and look at your nipple after the feed (just to prove to them it isn't right). Has your dd been checked for tongue tie?

Regarding pain it is perfectly normal for the initial sucks to hurt for a few weeks but that should go and it should not hurt during the whole feed.

If you are finding that support is less than good in hospital make sure you have details of support groups for when you get out.

Congratulations on your newborn!

I don't normally post on here as I have only my own experience to go on, no knowledge (!), but what you describe sounds similar to my first few days bfing.

Definitely not painless, but not unbearable either. I kept thinking of that same phrase you described and worrying I was doing it wrong.

Anyway, my experience was that when my milk came in (day 4?) it was then that I felt literally no pain, in fact I couldn't feel her sucking at all! It was lovely.

But up until then, I did have some discomfort. Changing her position (her body, not her latch) seemed to help, and the discomfort lessened during each feed. I was also taking painkillers/anti-inflammatories which must have helped a bit.

As you are in hospital it's definitely worth asking for more advice and guidance, and to check the latch. There must be people in there who do know what they are talking about!

Good luck

Both my babies made my nipples really sore and bf hurt for a week or so, even though the latch was fine (but do check this)
I very nearly gave up as is was so painful but then all of a sudden (presumeably the skin grew back...sorry tmi!) and the nipples get used to being stretched more and it's fine after. Well worth sticking with if you can.
congratulations and good luck.

my baby had a nice big gape but not enough mouth. When I'd successfully get enough boob in to look like a textbook latch she'd push a good portion out. We were in for 5 days after emcs and had latch checked lots, always told it was fine but that she had a very strong suck! My nipples went black and bits fell off. It hurt so much when she latched but I used plenty of lanisoh and that really helped. It stopped hurting after a couple of weeks.

It can be either the latch, or sensitive nipples, or a combination of both. Use Lansinoh and ask your MW or HV for some Jelonet dressing.

Personally, I think that nipples are a bit like lips. Remember the chapped lips you got after marathon teenage snogging sessions? Nobody tells you you're doing snogging wrong, it's just that suddenly they are getting about a million times more action than previously!

You do need to be getting the nipple further back in the babies mouth if it is coming out flatter. The pain is from the nipple rubbing on the hard palate in the babies mouth, it should be right back on the soft palate.

It is normal for the first few seconds to hurt in the beginning until your nipples get used to it, but should be more comfortable after that.

The lipstick shape is a big red flag to me that the latch is NOT right. As Tiktok mentioned, tongue tie is a possibility or maybe just a deeper latch is needed.

Can you call on your local NCT or LLL breastfeeding counsellor if there is one to come and take a look?

my nipples hurt the first week the nurses said i had a good latch but i think after a week your nipples calice over and if you do have a correct latch it will tug not hurt. i have very sensitive nipples and it does not hurt me only the first week. nipple cream will be your best friend. it will get better my nipples hurt like that at first then the pain would subside during the feeding too i would cry whenever i fed her but give it a few days

I've fed both of mine and the initial 2 mins of each feed in the early weeks was painful. With dd it was a "ouch, ooh" level of pain. With DS I was actually sobbing tears on to him as it was agony!

It didn't last the whole feed tho and I didn't have huge cuts or anything. I think if you have pain the whole feed and your nipples are wrecked maybe there is a latch problem.

Stick at it if you can - it really does get easier. I'm feeding my DS now and it's pain free and so convenient.

With dd1 bf hurt so much but i kept getting told her latch was textbook and to persevere. 5 days later my nipples where raw and cracked, there was blood in my milk and i had to give formula feeds just to give them time to heal.

The 5th health visitor i saw finally said to ignore the 'correct'latch as dd hadn't read the books! We tried a different way and it was so much more comfortable straight away.

With my dts i did what i felt was right from the 1st feeds and never suffered with painful feeds- 1st weeks were uncomfortable but nothing like with dd 1.

If it wasn't for that h v i would have given up and never tried with Dts.

After the 1st couple of weeks i hardly noticed them feeding. Hope you manage to work out what works for you.

Breastfeeding in the early days bloody hurt! I couldn't understand how it could be so painful when my son was latched correctly. My nipples just needed to toughen up. It does settle down, trust me, we're still going 2.5 years later after a very rocky start.

Sorry, just reread op. Does sound like the latch is wrong. Please ask to see a breastfeeding support worker. Bloody insist. Keep asking for help, it will be there somewhere. Good luck!

No one can really tell you if the latch is right just by looking. If it doesn't feel right to you then it probably isn't. If you get your nipple far enough back in babies mouth it should hurt less or not at all. Lansinoh cream will help your nipples heal if there is damage.

Ask to see a lactation consultant if there is one available.