Am I unusual to have bf 3 children for (nearly) 3 years without expressing?

[wolvesarejustoldendaydogs]

I bf DS1 and DS2 each for a year, and am still bf 9mo DD.

I don't express at all - tried a couple of times and it took ages to get a tiny bit of milk. I am fortunate in that my lifestyle enables me to manage without expressing - I work from home and have a part-time nanny, so I can break off and take the baby for a bf whenever required.

But I just wondered if it is unusual not to express. The thread about Amazon advertising a 'complete breastfeeding set' comprising pump & bottles etc. made me think of it. I have never bought/used a bottle. Is expressing part and parcel of bf for most mothers?

I expressed but only because DD wouldn't latch at first and I HAD to. It's nice to have the pump around now, in case I have a blocked duct. (Not that it helped me avoid mastitis lastweek... grrr) I would never be able to pump enough to equal a feed.

BHND, did you mean to sound so bitchy ?

I think BHND misunderstood my OP as smug/stealth boasting of some sort. Reading it back, I can see how it could sound like that, though it's not what i meant.

tooscary is probably right, it's all about being able to sell us stuff - bf without expressing is very cheap! And I think that you are right about mums needing to know there is no link between expressed amount and the amount a baby at the boob gets. When I was in hospital that night with 5 day old DD, the doctors' attitudes made me cry (I was hormonal) - three different (female) doctors looked with scorn/disappointment at the expressed amount I produced and were very dismissive of my insistence that I wanted to bf DD. A lovely midwife told me privately to ignore them, and the next morning we were bf happily again.

voidka you have my respect. i am very pro-bf (for me) but I could not have done the exclusive expressing thing.

i can't express either and hated it when i tried.

That's fantastic we'll done . I think that there are advantages and disadvantages to feeding from boob and expressing. Ds is 8 weeks old and I express his feeds as there were problems at birth which resulted in formula top ups and ds just refused the breast and would just cry and fuss at each feed and so it was just easier to express it off for him. I have a dd with sn and it's nice that dh is able to look after ds whilst dd and I have some mummy time outside. Itvp means I can leave ds with dh or friend. I need to do this as dd is having a birthday party at Macds because of er sn I need to be with her and supervise her at the party, dd godmother is looking after ds and giving her my expressed milk in a bottle. I would find it hard if I was feeding from boob. It's nice not being the sole food giver

Expressing though not free is cheap, 50 for my wonderful spectra hospital grade pump and 5 pounds for milk storage bottles. I already had bottles and steriliser from when I had dd. ds is still getting my milk but from a different way

I saw expressing as a normal part of bf the first time round - it did seem fed to us with talk of not expressing before 6 weeks. DH did give DS a couple of bottles and enjoy it, tbh I don't know if it was worth it. I did feel quite tied by breastfeeding, so maybe this did help psychologically. And I was in hospital overnight when he was 4m, so my freezer stash and the fact DH could feed him was essential.
With DD i didn't expres (well, maybe once or twice in the first couple of months, but never actuall gave her the milk)

Never seemed to have time. It didn't seem as big a deal but she didn't feed as long as DS (I remember the first time she came off after feeding for 10mins, me trying to re-attach her thinking "what is wrong with this baby?" until DH pointed out she had just finished her feed, unlike DS where one feed merged seamlessly into another).
I'm very glad that now she's 2, even though I am still bf her, my days of obsessing over feeding and expressing are over!

Sorry meant its not easy being the sole food giver this predictive text is so annoying. I am just pleased that ds is able to have my milk whatever way, I was not able to do that for dd

yes, I find bf a bit wearing - just tiring I think - but DD is 9mo now and will be our last child so soon it should be tailing down a bit - she feeds a lot at night but when we get to about 12mo will start night weaning her.

I'd like to go on bf her longer (stopped at 12/13mos with her brothers because wanted to ttc and wasn't ovulating) but ideally just morning/last thing at night rather than all through night!

I really don't mind tbh, my pump is excellent so only really spend about 15 mins on it to express a feed, the alternative would be formula (which i do use at night) and I would still be faffing round with bottles and steriliser as ds does not want to go on the boob. At least he is getting my milk, its the same milk as if he were feeding from me, not substandard because I am expressing

Really there are advantages and disadvantages to both, as least it gives me some flexibility and its good to know ds is getting my milk

I tried to express with ds1 as I went bavk to work when he was 6 months so it would have even a godsend. But I just couldn't do it.
So I didn't even try with ds2 who fed for about a year, nor with DD who fed for so long I won't say as it would start another thread

I do enjoy that anyone would regard 'i didn't express' as a boast. People can fibd anything to get the ache about on here. I remember sweating and crying and feeling shitty and incompetent because I couldn't express. But in the land of mn it becomes a boast.

yes, pagwatch, it is strange to think it's a boast! I am sure that if I found it easy to express I would have done it, and I felt rubbish not being able to get more out when trying to express in hospital for dd.

Not at all suggesting there is some sort of superiority to boob rather than ebm! (Nor that there is any moral superiority to bf rather than ff, only a health difference.)

really just interested to know about others who bf without expressing, not everyone can adjust their lifestyle to fit that, so if you can't/don't want to express it is more limiting.

i have always worked on the assumption that if something happened to me / there was some emergency that meant I couldn't be there to bf, then DH would have to go and buy some formula and bottles and feed the baby - would be very stressful for him and baby, but fortunately situation hasn't arisen.

well i fed mine for over a year. working 3 long days a week outside the home from 9 months i regularly used my pump so they could have bm in a beaker without me. also in the erly days it helped me take the edge off if they slept through but my boobs didnt! it made my life easier, i am not sure what you ae refrring to really, i mean i know plent of women in america only get few weeks of maternity leave so lots of them exclusively pump during the day. its a product that helps more women breastfeed for longer. i found pumping easy and pain free.

Imo feeding from boob is harder as you are the sole food giver, nobody else can do it. I am fortunate that the amount I express is good so my ds mainly has ebm and 1`formula at night. I am able to spend time alone with dd (sN) take her out and spend some mummy time with her, as there are issues around her and her new brother. I can leave ds and dd with dh and so some indulgent clothes shopping kiddy free , so there are advantages and disadvantages to both. I wish that ds would take to the boob but everytime I try he fusses, arches his back and kicks his legs and gets so distressed, that i just express and give it into a bottle for him.

yes, sorry, wasn't clear. i meant for women like me, who can't get much milk out by expressing - not for those who like piglet & ready can express.

I found it quite easy to express but am still too lazy to bother. I have a few bags in the fridge for peace of mind in an emergency, but DD2 has had about half a dozen bottle feeds at 9 months and DD1 was similar. She fed to about 21 months, but by the time I went back to work was happily on morning and evenings only on the three days I was out (and, actually, most days even if I was there).

I understand expressing works for some people, but what I never saw the appeal for myself. Perhaps this is simply because I can't be arced to go shopping or out for the evening - DD2 doesn't sleep well, so by 8pm all I want is a glass of wine and a seat on the sofa .

I didn't express for the younger two DC and only a couple of times for DS! because I was doing an evening course when he was born and went back when he was around a months old.
It's quite unusual because a lot of people go back to work and need to express and like to have some in the freezer as a back up amongst other reasons.

ha! secondtime, me too, i spend my evenings on the sofa watching TV with DD on my knee, and really can't be bothered to go out!

Well I feel it's more flexible, I get the bestvofvboth worlds. I would have liked to feed ds from boob as well as expressing but did not work like that

yes, i think i have built up expressing in my mind as some sort of impossible, exhausting, time-consuming, difficult task, but for many women it is quite a straightforward thing. we all have to make the best of the options we have!

I have spent the last 7 years BF. I did not express at all until DS was born at 31 weeks almost 5 years ago. I had to express in order to meet the demands of his tube feeds before we established BF.

I was also told I had to express (or FF) when home to give him his meds in a bottle. It is only with hindsight after a few weeks that I realised I could just inject his meds (vitamins/sytron etc) straight into him and not mix them with expressed milk in his bottle. When I realised DH was not going to bottle feed DS EBM (he was too nervous due to DS size) I gave up the bottles and got him established entirely on the boob. He happily fed for 2.5 years.

Luckily the hospital lent me a pump whilst I expressed. I also bought a pump 3 years ago to have at home when I had mastitis after an early MC. DD1/DS/myself could not help relieve the blockage so I succumbed to a pump which did help. I also used it briefly to express when DD2 was born in case DH ever need to feed her but I recently threw the EBM away as she has always had it from source.

I would say it is not unusual to not express but have expressed myself so really no help at all.

I bf both kids until 2ish and never expressed. I was just crap at it and it seemed to combine all the disadvantages of ff with all the disadvantages of bf. I worked full time as well, but went back when they were 6/8 months old and used to run over to nursery and bf in my lunch-hour until they could get by on morning, evening and a lot of night feeding. It probably pushed dd onto solids a bit earlier than came naturally but worked as a compromise between my guilt at working and need to expiate guilt by bf. I do think some of the emphasis on expressing is so companies can sell stuff to breast-feeders when a lot of the point is that it doesn't require any stuff at all.

op, you are not special.

and it's worth remembering that it's not about you.