Partner support the most importantt factor in influencing mothers' decision to breast feed

[popsycalindisguise]

here

Interesting that "Breastfeeding orientation provided by doctors, nurses, and nutritionists was not associated with the maternal decision to breastfeed."

discuss

You can educate all you like, some people have genuinely had a rubbish time with breastfeeding, and we can't impose gagging orders! They will talk about it.

Yes good point Leah

I remember DH kneeling on the floor literally begging me to give up breastfeeding ds1 after weeks of virtually no sleep, mastitis, agonising pain, crying and shaking with pain while feeding...it mattered so much to me to carry on. I had been through months of hell already - wheelchair-bound with SPD, injecting insulin twice a day, six weeks in hospital with pre-eclampsia, retained placenta, third degree tear, post-partum haemorrhage....it angered DH that I felt under pressure to continue with something that was causing constant pain, strain, misery and sleeplessness. DS1 was getting blood-stained milk at every feed, and at one point I took off a breast-pad and the nipple virtually came away. Being bitten by a large hungry baby on chafed, open wounds is painful. But it mattered terribly to me to give him the best start in life and not to fail. I don't know how you go about supporting and educating women to get them through that kind of scenario.... I know that the midwife militia in the hospital who told me breastfeeding was painless did me no favours at all! I already felt as though I had done pregnancy and birth wrong - this sort of misinformation only makes women feel as though they are getting feeding "wrong" too!

Wow MoM, I have so much respect for you.

Education is the key here I am sure. Parenting classes at school as well as sex education would be of benefit to so many. The pros and cons of breast v bottle could be discussed with examples shown of both.

Yes colditz I have to say that after having dd whenever anyone I knew said they were pg I was on a mission to tell them how hard it really all was - I don't mean just bf, but the whole thing. I felt cheated that no one had actually told me the truth about motherhood esp in the early weeks. Luckily I had read scary books so was a bit prepared. Plus, I thought perhaps a lot of women give up bf so quickly because they weren't told how hard it would be at the beginning? I had a comparatively easy time establishing bf - by day 3 I think it was i was in absolute agony feeding dd but a midwife came and showed me how dd was latching on incorrectly and the pain went away instantaneously. If it hadn't been for her I couldn't have carried on (massive respect MoM! ) And, I had my very supportive mother reassuring me all the time that it would get easier and less intense - I had no idea dd would bf for such long periods of time and for so often in those early weeks. I suppose there's got to be a balance - clearly the horror stories put you off colditz, but I think there's a certain amount of sense in preparing people for how hard it really is when they are in fact envisaging a wonderful blissful experience, at the same time reassuring that it can settle down and become easier.

I admit that when I got pregnant, I hadn't even thought about how I was going to feed the baby once they arrived. It was my DH who said that he wanted me to try breastfeeding. Shamelessly I think I'd been brainwashed by all those TV images of mummy feeding the baby with a bottle (not many breastfeeding going on in the average show).
I was a bit reluctant at first, kind of thinking of all the bad things that I'd heard (no sleep, hard work, painful nipples, no help etc) but said I'd give it a go.
My DD was 17 weeks yesterday and we're still breastfeeding. It's going really well, but I think I have been lucky (no cracked nipples thank God!!). My DH is very supportive about it, though he doesn't understand why I prefer to feed in a private room at families houses.
I will admit though that I found it a struggle to begin with, and my DH saw how I was acting and how I felt and told me if I wanted to, we'd go to formula. But at that stage, I wanted to prove that I could do it, so kept at it.
I have to say though that coming from a family where most babies were formula fed, it isn't understood as much. Out of the five cousins she has, not one of them was breastfed.

After being railroaded into giving formula in hospital and ds subsequently turning into a breast refuser, took us 4 weeks in total, loads of expressing and endless tries at breast to get from mixed feeding to exclusive bf. During that time I was often really upset as I'd been so set on bf and had nver envisaged it not working out. dh was sometimes incredibly unsupportive, saying it didn't matter if he had formula (it did - to me!) and getting very impatient with me indeed. That just boosted my bloody-mindedness, but I can certainly see how in less determined mothers/robust relationships it might be more damaging. It was fantastic, btw, after it had all worked out, hearing dh admit he was wrong .

I have to admit I have spent past 2 years "indoctrinating" DH about the benefits of BF...but glad it seems to have paid off...we watched that programme on Ch. 4 together and was really happy that DH came up with some fantastic comments about it, including that the Little Angels should have had a programme all on their own : )

He says whenever one of his work colleagues has a baby, first thing he asks is, "is your wife breastfeeding ?"

It's hard to imagine how my boyf might be if we had a child together. He had to put up with whatever I was doing with dd, just being the boyf, but I know for sure he was uncomfortable with bf in public, as i said earlier. He had no problem whatsoever with me bf with just himself present though of course. I can also imagine that he would get very anxious if I was finding it difficult. He didn't have to be with us 24/7 in dd's early days (in the first couple of months, hardly at all) but if he was father it would be a different story i reckon. I'm sure I remember him saying things like "Well, you've chosen to do it this way, you know..." though don't remember if that was about bf or not.
Although, now we've been through this experience, perhaps he would be less anxious next time round - prepared to a certain extent. I would def find it harder to do things solely my way though, his opinion didn't matter with dd.