how to stop breastfeeding and cosleeping??aaaaaaaah

[rosane]

hi everyone

i'm new here. wow have so many issues and questions that i could post but il take it step by step
ok for the mean time il stick to my main issue. dd is 10 months old now and breastfed. she is what they call a "clingy baby". we co-sleep which is something that i want to stop but dont know how to. im going of my point here, thats another issue that needs addressing. anyway she has 3 meals and snacks in between as well as about 10 breast feeds a day, i presume its more of a comfort thing-which i do no mind, the problem is she feeds just as much at night!! so she wakes up every 2 hours or every hour its random.

i also have a 6 year old daughter who requires my attention too of course so i have decided to stop breastfeeding!! the question is how??? dd wont even look at a bottle let along put her mouth round it!! she obvioiusly needs a bottle (my thinking) to soothe her hence why i havent thought of a sippy cup!!
really what i would love to happen is for her to settle in her cot sleep in her cot with no boobie.

i dont know, but any suggestions are appreciated :)

Hi, I BF my DS + DD and they have been quite different so perhaps you could try a few options and see what works. Changing all the breastfeeds to bottles AND getting your baby to sleep through at the same time sounds unlikely.

Perhaps you could start with the day feeds first? My DS stopped BF out of the blue at 11 months. He was clingy/ affectionate with 6-8 feeds a day even with 3 meals etc. He refused bottles. I used a Tommee Tippee sippy cup in the day to give him cow's milk as a drink as he was close to a year old. He didn't take much so I added in extra cheese + dairy for calcium and porridge made with milk before bathtime when i would usually have BF. Then had a water cup available in the night if he woke thirsty. Reducing the day feeds might help you feel you have more time for your older DD?

DD has never decided to stop and so is still BF at 18 months but mostly only when she wakes up in the morning and when she goes to bed. She will ask for mummy milk in the day and I will either explain that eg lunch is ready, or feed her if it's convenient. When she stays at Gparents she doesn't have any replacement bottles or drinks, just eats more food and offered water cup frequently. She starts the night in her cot but co-sleeps with me after about 1am when she wakes up often. Good luck!

Tackling one thing at a time is probably a good idea.

Why don't you try with settaling her into a cot in the eveings and see how well she sleeps there, you could bring her into your bed latter if she still wake's up a lot to start with. Or send some one else into settle her during the night maybe aiming to cut down on feeds rather then go cold truky straigh away. Night weaning mite be a good place to start some usefull info hear www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html.

As she is feeding so much stopping needs to be a graduale process for you, droping a feed every few days at lest and as she is 10months and they don't recomend bottle's after 12months anyway it's probably a good idea to consder just going straite to cups.

It's going to take some time it's not going to be a quik change and also stopping feeding overnight does not nesaraly mean she'll sleep through.

I would address the sleeping thing as I think that will naturally lead to her sleeping more and better as she won't be able to smell you! Does she nap in the cot during the day? If so, I'd start putting her down in her cot at night. You'll probably need to do pat and reassure for a while, but she doesn't need to be feeding every two hours during the day or the night at 10 months. She's just got into the habit of doing it - so you have to help her to break that habit.

I would start by not immediately putting her to the breast when she wakes or grizzles during the day. My DS (who is the same age as your DD), is BFing only 4 times every 24 hours now and I believe this is about what's considered normal at this age.

You need to cut down gradually though - both for her mental health and your milk supply - which must still be high. I'd try cutting out one feed at a time and leave yourself with first thing in the morning, before naps and before bed.

As for comfort - she'll suck on something else if you give her the chance to self-soothe. You may want to try a dummy if you're not really anti. She's old to start on that, but it could be worth trying. I'd also skip the bottle idea and move straight to a sippy cup. My BF DS still won't drink much from a cup, but if he's thirsty it's there, and I only offer BM now at certain specific times of the day, so he knows it's water otherwise. Just make a plan and stick to it. If you're consistent she'll soon catch on, but initially she will protest, so you'll have to be strong!