breastfeeding in public without the flashing

[stmarymead]

So I am of larger boob, a rather inelegant 36j...and i just cannot get my head round how I will ever bf in public without full on boob exposure. Feeding is a strictly 2 hand affair with non baby holding hand acting as scaffolding! Anyone else had this challenge and overcome it? I am starting to feel like a hermit...
Thanks in advance for any tips, experiences, advice.

I am massive of nork, never flashed whilst feeding.
What clothes are you wearing?

Vest underneath to pull down, loose top over the top to pull up? Use a nice scarf to kind of drape over the baby?

Have you tried rolling up a muslin and popping it under your boob? Frees up your spare hand. (Also you can put pressure on your milk ducts using a hand as a prop leading to mastitis - happened to me - so rolling up a muslin is a good idea at home too).

Meant to say, I would cross my leg and rest the wrist of the arm that was holding baby's head on it, make sure you are sitting in a straight backed chair so as upright as possible.
Baby would be almost underneath boob slightly.
It's kinda hard to explain in writing.

I'm 36J I either have vest top or boob tube on under normal top, pull down vest and up top. I need one hand to help atop suffocating dd. will drape a muzzy over my shoulder of the side I'm feeding if I feel like I need more coverage but in all honesty I don't think anyone really notices.

hello 34H here, I found layers were helpful to hide behind. A vest top with stretchy straps so you could pull it down to reveal norkage, shirts that button could be undone to will keep your upper chest with dignity and a loose floaty cardi type thing that I could pull around DD's head to keep those latch/de-latch moments more private.

I am also mighty of bingo wing and have found that helps to control a flopping nork. I tuck my elbow into my ribs to stop the boob escaping under arm. I often found that feeding sat on the floor cross legged helped. This could only be done at baby groups or other such events, as you'd look a leetle odd in a cafe :) A friend of mine - same boobage - puts a rolled up coat/cardi/jumper on her lap to cushion the baby and lift them up a bit so your arms aren't doing all the holding.

It takes time to get to grips with outdoor feeding, watch what other mums do. I attend a good group that the majority of mums BF and we all do things slightly differently and it's been good to see what they do. Don't be afraid to ask them about the holds they use.

As DD has got older I am much more confident about it, she's 15 months now, the worst bit was approaching 9 months when she was distracted by everything and would lift her head up to nosy about while displaying my nips to all and sundry. Now she's a speed feeder as she knows once she's done she can go off and play.

H&M do some good BF tops, I got a couple of ones that had a false vest insert and buttoned up like a grandad shirt, no collars and of a light t-shirt material so washed well and wasn't clingy. I didn't get on with the heavier feel/stretchy t-shirt ones. I found for the larger breast the band that ran around under boob sat quite high and rubbed me raw through my nursing bras.

Wow, thanks all...fab tips. I need to invest in some long vests and get practising. Particularly like the cardi idea to effectively act as a cloak!!:)
The whole carry on is so daunting at present I empathise with the naked photo bit on How To Look Naked...

Ive a couple of HH's wanging round my frontage too and echo all the advice above. Try hooking the hem of floaty top or pashmina under the thumb of your boob-holding hand, so even if baby pops off for a look around, the top half of your boob will be covered!

Also practise in front of a mirror - you'll see that barely anything is on show. I always got far too hot and flustered trying to wield a muslin or feeding cover, squirmy baby and pair of giant lolling milk sprayers, so concentrated on doing the job as quickly and efficiently as poss, which draws less attention anyway.

Excuse my ignorance but when people refer to 'tests which can be pulled down', would they be specific nursing vests with clips on the straps or just normal vests?

I used to wear a stretchy v neck that I would pull down and a normal very top that would come up (so the opposite way to most of the others, but it worked for me) so there was only a sliver of boob on display in between - worth practicing at home

36G/H here when I was first feeding with a baby who I had to position really, really carefully for months as it took him ages to get the hang of feeding without hurting me after his tongue tie was divided.

At first, as well as wearing two stretchy layers I carried a huge sheer scarf/sarong that was folded into a triangle with the two ends knotted together so I could hang it round my neck and then position over one shoulder and boob to cover up the latching on and off and on and off. Practising how to use it at home helped.

I also loved my Bravado nursing vest so I didn't need to always wear a separate bra and vest. I thought it was expensive when I bought it but wish I'd got more than one as I still use it regularly now 11months in and it is v battered and worn.

stmarymead
Apart from the Bravado vest with proper built in bra I didn't like any vests with nursing clips I tried and just ended up using normal ones that were stretchy enough to pull up or down as required.

Vests like these ones are great for pulling down as the straps are stretchy.

In my case it couldn't be done without covering my DC. Unfortunately due to a lot of problems I breastfed only at home for the first couple of months so didn't care about exposure. Which meant my baby fought anything covering his head by the time I was ready to venture out. So when out and about I spent a lot of time looking for dark corners. What I wanted to say is start covering your baby up now when breastfeeding so she will get used to it.

I'm not sure why a baby needs "covering up" though? Doesn't that end up drawing more attention to yourself? I don't and have even had several conversations with people along the lines of "I expect she will need feeding soon" or "aren't you going to feed her at some point" from people not realising that I was feeding there and then!

I think confidence and experience are key - the more you do it the more happy you will get doing it and the less fussed you are the less attention you draw to yourself. AS someone further up said you really do reveal a lot less than you think - do look in a mirror.

I find that pulling underlayer down and upper layer up works for me but its different for different people. There may be a bf support group/ peer supporters/ similar near you which will provide a "safe" space to get used to feeding with others who really wont mind if you flash/spray etc while you get the hang of it!

Thanks all...once again brill tips and advice. I think confidence and speed of latch are the order of the day! The latter of which we definitely need to work on!

Primark has some great stretchy vests at the moment in lots of colours for £2.

I think what usingapseudonym said about confidence is spot on. I've had waiters taking orders from me while bf in pubs. Given they are all pretty young, my money is on them thinking I was cuddling my baby.

I use the vest under top method. It's the most discreet. Only your nipples are out and your LO will have that covered.

If the OP is very self conscious, how about invest in something like a bebe au lait? The last thing you should do is feeling you can only bf at home or in the loo when out!