Trapped in feeding prison, getting very worn down

[Switz]

Hi

DD, 16 weeks old takes 3 goes to get through a5/ 6oz bottle meaning that I am forever trapped on sofas or looking for somewhere to feed if out. She will have 1oz to start with and then spits out teat, refuses to take any more. Then we have to wait 40mins before she will have any more usually 2 oz this time. Then another 30/40mins before having another 2oz. She will then nap for 15 to 40mins before waking up and starting the whole cycle over again. Health advisor suggested giving her water instead but apart from upsetting her stomach I really don?t see how that?s going to help anything. She also spends 20/30mins getting through her 1 to 2 oz each time as she spends a lot of the time just chewing the teat and I have to half pull it out before she sucks it backs in for a few sips.

She does have reflux and it was suggested that this is just her way of dealing with it. At night she has on occasion taken 4oz so I know she CAN do it.

Do I just have to ride this out? Most days I just deal with it but other days like today when sleep has been poor I just see the day stretching out ahead of me in a feeding, puking, trapped nightmare. Arranging baby classes etc is a nightmare as it?s virtually impossible to fit around a feed and they are too expensive to waste watching from the sides as she slowly gets though an oz. Also, how is she ever going to sleep for long periods or through the night when she never fills her stomach up enough?

I have posted on this before but didn?t get any responses so if anyone has been in this boat before and can advise it would be hugely appreciated. I am a first time mum who is lost.

I don't bottle feed, so this is going on experiences of friends - is there any improvement with a different "speed" teat, or a different bottle type?

Couple of thoughts - 16 weeks was nightmare stage of growth and feed faff so
May be an age thing (dd improved by about 18 weeks).
Agree re the teat as dd sped up immensely when changed teat.
You mention reflux- you can get reflux friendly formula (sma do one). Have hv
Or gp suggested that?
Would dummy/your finger take edge of the first faff about feed as If it's just comfort suck that might suffice .
Use a sling and try to Master art of feeding that way as that might help you not be glued to sofa.

Do you have a children's centre near you? Not only will there be supportive staff and mums there, but all sessions are free or a token cost and I've often seen mums spend the whole time feeding! At ours they bring you a cuppa and love to hold babies too.

Thank you for your replies. Yes, we have tried every teat that Tommy Tipee (previouly Avent but TT worked better for DD) sells and have settled on a varyflow. We are on a SMA reflux formula. Not tried a dummy yet, have been trying to avoid that but if things don't improve in next few weeks that may change! Will find my nearest childrens centre, I'm in London so there can't be one that far away.

Thank you again, I know it will improve at some point, it's just a struggle sometimes waiting for it to get better!

Oh Switz, it's hell isn't it? My DD is the same way, though she's mix fed (adding another time-consuming layer!). If you search my posts, you can see us going through the same thing. DD also has reflux, and I think it's just how she has to deal with it. It's so demoralising. You feel like you can't go anywhere at all.

We've recently had a bit of an improvement (at 8 mos!) by doing all of her feeding in our bed. I basically bf her to sleep and then she'll take 4oz (amazing for her!) in one go. Could you try something similar w/o the bf? I know feeding bottles lying down is not recommended, esp for reflux, but something about it makes her relax enough to drink more.

Getting out of the house when she'll only feed in bed is a different problem altogether. :) But happy to have made that trade as I'm no longer spending my whole day feeding.

Really hope things improve soon.

If she's on reflux formula has she had a formal diagnosis? If not I'd go along to the GP and say that you think she may have reflux and ask for their opinion, although from the posts I've seen on here, you may have to push for a formal diagnosis.

Have you seen the reflux support thread too?

I think your DD is a smart baby who knows what she is doing ...

If she has reflux, then frequent, slow and small feeds is exactly what she needs. If you force her to take more than she wants (e.g. fast flowing teat, jiggling bottle etc), you are just going to get loads more puking and one very unhappy baby in pain.

I'm sorry, I know this isn't what you wanted to hear but is there any way you could work around it for the time being? Maybe go to friends' houses/childrens centre rather than expensive baby groups? Eat cake, watch DVDs, be kind to yourself?

She will grow out of this soon - tummy issues tend to sort themselves out by 6 months - and then you could try baby-led weaning so she can feed herself while you have a break!