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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

4mo won't feed during the day but is up all night

23 replies

Loobylou77 · 22/02/2012 04:03

Hi,

I'm hoping someone can help me out...

My 4mo is EBF and has recently started feeding much faster during the day (less than ten mins and sometimes less than five) and going up to four hours between feeds. I thought this might be because he has become more efficient but I'm wondering if it's because he's very easily distracted - am feeding him in the quietest room possible but it doesnt make much difference. He also used to sleep for a couple of hours at least one nap of the day but is now only sleeping for 40 mins at a time.

This would be fine except he's now started feeding every couple if hours through the night and sometimes stays awake wanting to play after some if those (if I put him in his bed he is happy for a bit then gets upset). So I'm also concerned he's not getting enough sleep.

I've been dealing with recurring infection and pain since before Christmas and still been determined to carry on but this is starting to threaten my resolve, especially because I also have a 2yo to look after during the day.

Can anyone help? Is there anything I can do?

OP posts:

EdwardorEricCantDecide · 22/02/2012 04:56

Sorry I have no help to offer but will watch with interest as I'm in exactly the same situation.
I know there is a sleep regression at around 4 months due to developmental growth spurt so I'm just hoping she'll grow out of it.

GodisaDj · 22/02/2012 05:56

I would say sleep regression. I had the same at 4 months.

It has got slightly better now dd is 6 months.

I've also worked out that she's not as vocal for her milk during the day like she used to be (because she's doing more, interested in more things etc), so I offer it more often rather than letting her go 3-4 hours. Sometimes she takes it and then realizes she was hungry! Perhaps might help to do this.

ALotToTakeIn · 22/02/2012 07:45

My very nearly 4mo DD is the same, much faster feeds and all her tiny baby feeding cues have disappeared. Makes it very hard to know when she is hungry. In the evening I tend to keep her on my lap, boob out for at least an hour before I want to go to bed. She either plays, sleeps or feeds as she want but with the boob right by her head she feeds a lot.

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 22/02/2012 07:49

Sorry to hear you're in the same situation Edward I had wondered about sleep regression etc but wondered if it was also due to him not being so keen to feed during the day and perhaps then making up for it at night?

GodisaDJ I will give that a go, DH has suggested the opposite thinking if he is hungrier maybe he'll feed better but I think that it will make the night time feeding worse if he's getting even fewer feeds during the day.

I'll try the more frequent offering of a feed and see how it goes. Does anyone else have any thoughts?

OP posts:

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 22/02/2012 07:55

Thanks Alot I tried that last night and he took the 'play' option which drove me crazy after a couple of hours! He has been cluster feeding in the early evenings but has stopped that of late. Agree re feeding cues, the only one I have to watch out for now is hand sucking but even that doesn't seem to be a given! It's comforting to know I'm not the only one in this situation I guess...

OP posts:

lookout · 22/02/2012 14:01

Loobylou, we have the same thing here too with ds2, 19 weeks. I'm putting it down to a mixture of sleep regression and distractibility during the day. My lc basically said it happens quite often - baby is distracted during the day so needs to catch up on calories in the night and can do so without any distractions. She said to just go with it and rest when you can. Easier said than done, I know, especially with a toddler (my ds1 is at school all day, so slightly easier). But I'm trying to offer the breast more often during the day as ds2's feeding cues have disappeared, same as ALot. Doesn't always work but sometimes, as Godisa DJ says, he will realise he was hungirer than he thought! Also, feeding times do get shorter as they get bigger mouths and more efficient feeders.

Just so you know you are not alone

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 22/02/2012 16:00

Thanks again everyone. I've been offering the breast every 2-3 hours today and at times he's fed for ten mins in one go and he even had a long nap this afternoon.

What are your thoughts on when to switch sides? I want to make sure he gets enough hind milk but I'm not sure if he's feeding more efficiently anyway how I should play it. I usually, with the exception of the 7pm feed, will offer just one breast per feed.

OP posts:

GodisaDj · 22/02/2012 17:02

Good to hear Louby

I've only ever given one side for a normal feed so it depends what you normally would do. My supply is really good and always has been (in the sense that I've never needed to offer the other side, dd always satisfied off one). In the scenario like yours, eg feeding for a shorter time than normal, I'd be inclined to put baby back on same side for next feed. That is what I do with dd when she just has a 'drink'; that way she empties that breast and gets the fatty milk over the two feeds (sometimes three feeds if shes been particularly short with her feeds). I suppose you just know how 'full' your boobs are/should be, so see how you get on.

Half the time I'm patting my boobs to work out which one is fuller and then just take a guess if baby is putting on weight and is happy, I wouldn't worry too much about the fore/hind milk, they will get what they need from a feed

MigGril · 22/02/2012 17:37

I'd offer the seconed side when he's seems disinterested in the first, no need to worry if he doen't take it. Plus offer the first again when he's had enough of the seconed untill he doesn't want to feed again, again if he doesn't take it fine.

I also wouln't worry about hind milk thing it's a little overused term that unless you have an oversupply issue or a baby not gaining weight is really something most mum's don't need to think about. It tends to sort it's self out most of the time.

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 22/02/2012 18:20

Great, thanks for the reassurance everyone. He has always had a big appetite and went from the 25th centile at birth to just over the 75th now so I know he's usually getting everything he needs, it's just this change in behaviour and feeding pattern that's thrown me a bit. Everything seems worse when you are knackered and in my experience it seems to be just when you feel like things are settling down that my DC at least like to throw a curveball!

I feel as though today has gone much better so here's hoping for a bit more sleep tonight.

OP posts:

lookout · 22/02/2012 19:26

Loobylou I feel exactly the same about the curveball thing - we had had two good weeks, at last, of feeding and sleeping then it all went to pot!

Hope you get some better sleep tonight

PS, also listen to GodisaDJ; she is right, on here and all other threads

GodisaDj · 22/02/2012 21:00

thanks lookout that's lovely

looby everything always feels worse at night time too! I remember the middle of the nights being lonely too as I'd be awake and DP snoring his head off next to me (whilst I fed DD). I'm glad it has gone a bit better again today.

As for the curveball; the sleep regression will pass and teething will start then the fun begins again! I've had dd feed every 2 hours again for last two nights as she's cutting her 3rd tooth I think If only we could drink !!

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 23/02/2012 02:18

Oh I hadnt even allowed myself to think ahead to teething, thanks for the heads up . I hope your DD's tooth breaks through soon GodisaDJ that doesnt sound fun at all.

Thanks so much again to all of you, everything you've suggested is helping. Definitely feel a whole lot less alone too which is lovely.

OP posts:

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 24/02/2012 07:16

I just wanted to thank you all again, I've been feeding DS2 every few hours during the day like you all suggested and in as quiet a place as possible. He's been feeding for a bit longer and napping better.

Last night though was amazing, he woke only once for a feed and slept through til almost 7am. Likely a one-off but was the best sleep I've had in literally months :)

OP posts:

lookout · 24/02/2012 12:39

I'm so glad to hear it, if a little . We were up 5 times, 5 TIMES, last night and I am knackered and teary today. Hope you get another good night!!

GodisaDj · 24/02/2012 13:06

Sorry lookout
That's fab loony

A day of good days for us, our first "sleep through" Well I think anyway as don't remember waking, (poss to put dummy in in half awake/sleep state) but dd slept from 11 - 5 v smug today! She's def been on growth spurt too which would explain why I've been so hungry myself, as have weighed her at bf group and she was 16lb 12 two weeks ago and 17lb 7 today!

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 25/02/2012 10:03

Oh no lookout that's awful. I hope you can get some rest today. Wow GodisaDJ that's an impressive growth spurt! I am feeling very grateful for two 'sleep throughs' in a row, even if it all changes again tonight I know he can do it.

OP posts:

lookout · 25/02/2012 13:12

I am trying my hardest to be pleased for both of you! Hope it continues as long as possible!

Second night in a row of five night feeds for us. I am a wreck and feel terrible for my ds1 cos he's bearing the brunt of my bad mood . Have been in tears most of the day so far and am dreading another bad night. It has been two and a half weeks now since this sleep regression started. How much longer????

GodisaDj · 25/02/2012 15:24

Noooo! my smug face has officially gone. I fed every 90 min from 7pm to 5 am last night! One bloody sleep through had me all excited! pretty much feeding every 2 hours today. She's still in growth spurt I think as she's been so sleepy and out of sync this week and now feeding loads, plus I'm starving too. Have just eaten 12 mini donuts before lunch!

Sorry lookout he'll come out of it soon just hang on in there; lots of cuddles with dc2 today

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 26/02/2012 02:27

Yep we've officially reached the growth spurt too, he has fed every two hours all day and we're back to multiple night wakings now too. I still feel better knowing he can sleep through now and maybe he will again soon but I might not be saying that by morning...

Yum, mini donuts :o

Hope tonight has been better for you lookout you deserve some rest.

OP posts:

GodisaDj · 26/02/2012 04:42

And so it continues...every 90min to 2 hours since 8pm.

And now I think she's teething (again) as she struggled to get back off earlier and won't let me touch her mouth/gums. Bless her

Original poster

Loobylou77 · 26/02/2012 05:58

Poor little thing :(

I do feel much better than earlier in the week when I felt like everyone else's DC the same age were sleeping through (why do people say that, surely it's not true?!) so although I don't wish this on anyone I'm grateful to know someone else is in the same boat as me.

DH relegated himself to the sofa at the beginning of the last feed wanting to know how many times a baby could feed in one night. Every two hours of course, same as during the day...

OP posts:

lookout · 26/02/2012 19:36

Oh guys, that sucks. We had a good night last night, well that's to say he only woke 3 times rather than the normal five. He's still not managing longer than 3 hours though, which he had just started doing before.

GodisaDJ, I sooooo feel your pain. That's what it's been like for us for weeks now. WEEKS!!!

Looby, it really does help to know that other people are going through it.

I hope you both get better nights tonight. I'm prepared, as always, for the worst. I know it's pessimistic, but at least that way, anything other than the worst is a bonus

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