Please help me to keep going!

[mistressploppy]

DS2 is 13 days and fine in himself; nearly back to birthweight, pooing, good colour etc but is still really hard to get latched on. I'm just wondering if he'll EVER 'get' it? It can take an hour to get him on to feed, I think my nipples are too big/flat. I have to pinch them to the point of pain to get it in his mouth. He feeds ok once on, only for 10 mins though. I seem to have plenty of milk as it's easy to express decent quantities.

Nipple shields didn't help, but expressing a bit off before feeds seems to make it easier, but it's not really a sustainable solution with a toddler as well, we're virtually housebound as feeding only seems to work under specific conditions!

I desperately want to bf him so PLEASE tell me he'll figure it out soon! Your positive experiences are much appreciated!

youre obviously doing ok as you said pooing ok,weight back up etc.have you a local surestart centre that has breast feeding support?or a baby cafe?they can check positioning for you.failing that la leche league?
remember its a skill that needs to be learned and some are quicker. to "get it" than others.
keep going and best wishes

p.s if hes happy with ten mins and has big gulping sounds hes getting plenty of milk

Hi Ploppy,

Your DS sounds just like mine was at the same age. I didn't dare feed in public because he'd struggle to latch on, bob on and off, headbutt my boob and get upset. I promise you, he will get it - one day it just clicked and now at 18 weeks i can put him vaguely in the direction of my nipple and he'll latch on. I have a 3 yr old too so expressing everytime was a bit of a faff but i found if i rolled my nipple between my thumb and finger it was enough to make acshape for DS to latch on. Hang on in there, there were lots of tears of frustration from me in the early days especially at night and especially when he tried my left side but it will come, just give it time.

He's 13day's old, it's still really early day's. Do seek extra help with latch. But it will also get easier as he gets bigger, he's still learning at the moment.

Can you find a local breastfeeding counsellor or phone a helpline? The NCT have a national phone line that is really helpful, and I think they can also put you in touch with a local expert for face to face advice. Depening on your area, you may have local groups of peer-supporters (women who have b-fed their children and trained to offer support), or La Leche League meetups, where you can meet with other new mothers for reassurance.

Your midwife/healthvisitor should be able to give you the contact details of a local b-feeding specialist who can help. I was also given a list of local contacts from the hospital where dc was born.

I have two children - one is 4, the other is two months old - both were/are b-fed (the eldest I fed until they were one, and I hope to continue feeding the youngest for a similar period of time), but both times I have contacted specialists for help. Without their advice and support I wouldn't havebeen able to continue. You've done really well so far, and the fact that you are keen to continue is also a positive sign. Hope it works out well for you.

You're doing fine - it does get easier when they get the hang of feeding, and when they're a little bigger.

The best thing that helped me was a local support group, it was great to meet other mums who'd been through it, and as we progressed, we were able to help new mums coming into the group. It was lovely and I do miss it.

The 'witching hour' can be very difficult, this is the cluster feeding that happens in the evening, just when you're extra tired, and it can make many new mums think they're not making enough milk. It's nature's way of stimulating your milk supply, sort of like putting an order in for the next day.

Chocolate cake and a glass of wine can help you through cluster feeding. If you're confident, or when baby is a bit bigger, cosleeping can also help support breastfeeding.

have you tried something called "reverse pressure softening"? basically, you push the milk away from your nipple, back into the breast, so yuor nipple goes back to a more "normal" shape, making it easier for the baby to latch on. here's a link www.breastfeedingonline.com/rps.shtml but there are loads more out there.

good luck!

Thanks everyone. I've had the lovely NCT bf lady out twice and he did latch on eventually. I tried reverse pressure softening too, I think it helped a bit, and I needed to pump less out to get him on today so perhaps soon the RVP will be all that's needed?

The clustery evenings are not too bad actually - as my boobs are emptier, perhaps? It's the night feeds that are awful; I'm worried his yells will wake my 2yo, and my boobs are full and warm; bad combo for un-latch-onto-able nipples....

I will Carry On

I don't have anything to suggest other than what's already been mentioned but it sounds as if you are doing really well in difficult circumstances! Just get through one feed at a time and chances are before you know it things will have got easier. Good luck!

sounds like you are doing great and have the right positive mental approach.
I really will get easier as he grows and learns how to do it better. And it happens do fast. At 4 weeks I went to a group and was amazed at how easily everyone else fed and by 6 weeks I felt like one of them. By 12 weeks I could roughly point her at at a boob and leave her to it whilst MNting away merrily.

You sound to be doing great, def keep on with the support of a bf advisor, it kept me going with my little girl, fed her till 15 mths after really rocky start and mastitis three times! Have a little boy nearly 8 months and he's bf well too.,he cluster fed loads in the early weeks, it does settle! After a few months it will seem like you've always done it! I now bf anywhere! Well usually with a big cardigan though! Well done and congratulations!