BF routine going pear shaped.. Any ideas?

[UntamedShrew]

I had a great routine for my twins ( now 2) and am trying to replicate it for my DD (6w). Without much luck!

Theirs was 7, 11, 3 with 11pm being EBM bottle.

She got herself into a 3-4 hourly routine from the start so at 2w I tried to put her into this schedule. The day is no problem but it all goes wrong at bedtime.

I gave her an additional 5pm feed, on advice of other mums (Gina fans) who said it helped them have quiet baby on boob while feeding DTs their tea. However it gave her a bit of a colicky evening so we were giving Colief in 1oz expressed milk and this seemed to get rid of the rigid tummy etc.

I then wondered if the short 5pm feed was the problem, as she didn't need it / it'd just be fore milk maybe. So cut this to give a bigger 7pm feed.

This worked.. For 2 nights!

But last 2 nights she has wanted as well as huge 7pm feed, another at 8.30 & 9.30, and then refused to finish bottle at 11, so rest of night all over the place.

Any idea how long it'll take to get back on track? I feel I've cocked it all up by trying that 5pm feed in first place.

Slightly panicked as routine was key to remaining sane & stress free last time, so with 3 under 3 was hoping for more of same!

This shows a few things:

not all babies are the same
other mothers don't know your baby
Gina certainly doesn't know your baby
strict routines do not suit all babies (they didn't suit any of my three)

If you want my honest opinion, I would feed on demand, taking the baby next to you at night to make it easier.

Do you have help with the twins during the day?

Sorry forgot to say didn't give Colief last night but she wasn't colicky after - just hungry

Thanks Belgo

I guess my experience slightly skewed as most of my RL mum mates are twin mums, who all used routines successfully (nb: eventually!)

Have to agree with belgo, my 4w old is a cluster feeder in the evening although I feed her approx every 3 hours during the day and she is sleeping from 10 till 4 at night between the hours of 6 and 8 she is fussy and wants to be fed every 20mins. Bit of a nightmare with other kids but what can you do. What works for one baby won't work for another, sorry. Won't be forever though

Every baby is different! Mine is very very stubborn and won't feed if she doesn't want to, and will cry blue murder if you make her wait for her milk. I've tried Gina and ofc it never worked. She just wouldn't go to sleep at 10, wouldn't latch on when Gina wanted her to, etc.

I gave up after a while and just feed on demand. However she is a very good sleeper and slept through from around 11-12 weeks.

It may be she is protesting at the lack of feeds - 5 times a day is not enough for a 6w old baby, 8-12 times (or more if cue'd for) would be more what would be normally expected. It might have worked with twins due to the double volume of milk made, but with a singleton it may not be enough stimulation to convince your breasts to keep supplies up.

Rather than trying to make her go with long stretches without milk (BM is digested in around 45 mins), why not try feeding her when she shows you she is ready for more milk - looking and licking (scanning the room & licking her lips), wriggling/pumping her arms and legs, sucking on hands/lips, rooting, etc (crying is the last resort of a hungry baby).

She may also be asking to 'nurse' rather than bf - she might want to be close to you, too cold/hot, lonely, uncomfortable, in pain, tired, overstimulated - all valid reasons for a mammal baby to need to suckle with their mothers - humans aren't any different.

I had twins after the singleton, and breastfed both lots(wth formula too). I would say, enjoy the fact that you can demand feed a singleton in the way that twins make nigh impossible, and remember that breastfeeding will make your life so much easier with the twins around, and it's worth spending a bit more time feeding on demand now, for the time you will most definitely save later.

Gina is wonderful when they are older, say 15 weeks but at this stage I would do whatever makes life easier and flexible, and just feed her whenever she wants, or whenever is convenient. Most people with twins give up breastfeeding for the precisely the reason they are so determined to get into a routine. That doesn't need to happen with a singleton to the same extent, you can fit her feeds in slightly more easily that you would with juggling twins.

Congratulations, 3 under two is a handful, and I been there and done it. Enjoy every minute of your sweet new baby.

Shrew - all this sounds so complicated and as it is not making your life easier in anyway at all, and as it risks underfeeding and underproduction of milk, then just feeding responsively sounds like the way to go, for you and for her :)

Routines suit some babies; most babies thrive better and are happier, especially when young, when their needs are met.

Gina Ford's knowledge of how breastfeeding works is very thin.

Thanks everyone!

In the daytime she doesn't really look for any feeds, it's more me waking her & / or putting her on - and with such hectic days with the boys it has been useful for me to have set times to remind me to do this.

I did start to have mild wobble about my supply (thank you HV for vote of no confidence) but given huge volume of wet/dirty nappies, and I'm expressing 7-8oz off per day too, so don't think there's a problem there.

Swan it was really interesting to hear your twins/single perspective, there is definitely much to enjoy about the ease of just having one to feed this time. No special cushion for a start!

One other thing, if I do go to demand feed at night, do I swap sides at each one (or not, to get to hind milk) and do I bother keeping her awake to take 'enough' or just put her down even if it's mean her getting up again in half an hour..?

She won't get back up in half an hour if she's asleep! I always offer the second side if DD is still awake after she comes off herself. But a lot of times, she's milk drunk from the first, and is too comatose to take a second. If you are worry about the sleep, have you read Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution? It's very bf friendly.

BTW, I can see why you wake to feed a baby if she's not demanding during the day. I think the key is we need to watch and listen to our babies. If she won't fit into a fixed routine, it's just so much harder on both of you if she just cries and cries.

She isn't a big crier - she grunts if it's a tummy pain and shouts (sounds like a toddler!) if hungry. She's gorgeous

She's quite easy going then . My DD still cries till her face is red, with mouth so large you can only see her throat, if she's upset. She's very determined.

She may be easy going but she's a monkey - i'm mid feed here and she's just done an 'armpit job' poop and gave me such a cheeky grin as she did it! Ah well, what goes in...