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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Dreading BFing DC2 - any advice?

3 replies

Fishandjam · 16/01/2012 16:17

HI everyone,

I am 17 weeks up the duff with DC2 (yes, I know, ages to go yet.... but I'm seriously stressing about feeding!) My experiences with my first DS were, well, appalling. Basically a miserable failure - not sure what was wrong, but I had the whole gamut of new lipstick nipples, blanching, cracks, scabs, and awful pain (to the extent I would have to wad up paper towels and bite on them while feeding - not just initial let-down pain, but constant pain like someone was wrenching at my poor nips with a pair of pliers). Plus DS had something wrong with his latch, so in the first days after birth he would spend up to an hour at the breast, only to drop off exhausted and then wake 10-15 minutes later still starving. He would get jaw spasms, become too tired to feed, etc. He ended up severely dehydrated (and with jaundice), under phototherapy and a gnat's off needing to be tube fed because he was almost too weak to take a bottle.

I don't know what I could have done differently to make things better. I even stayed extra time in hospital in order to try to get it right (not that the BF support in hospital was any good).

I managed to express for 12 weeks, at which time I think DS got physically bigger and so was able to latch on without me suffering! We managed to BF until he was 18 weeks, when my milk supply just packed in (probably - according to the lactation consultant I ended up seeing - as a result of too-infrequent expressing in the very early days).

DS will be 2.5 when the new one arrives, and there's just no way I will be able to keep up that regime of expressing if I have the same troubles with no. 2.

I read advice on here on how to successfully BF, and some posters say things like "for the first few weeks all you should be doing is sleeping and feeding your baby". How do I do that with a demanding toddler in tow? Plus I have no family support other than DH - no mum or MIL to help, etc.

Any thoughts on how I can make this work? I want to, but not at the expense of my sanity!

OP posts:
er1507 · 16/01/2012 16:55

hey sounds like you had a tough time with your first experience but well done for going so long!! my dd is 6mo and i remember the first 2 weeks were very painfull when she lastched on! there was slight damage to one of my nipples but i used to rub a little milk on them and let them air dry and it worked a treat! all bf consultants used to say to feed on demand but i made sure i done it every 3 hrs and because babies have to would offer 25min on one side and then offer the other. i used to express a little after the 1st morning feed but only about 2oz and again after her afternoon feed at 2pm. i also found the position where they straddle your leg so their tummy is against yours much easier to do and i think dd prefered it that way, until she got too long and now i feed her in a cradle position. is co sleeping an option because it will help in terms of nightfeeds and will help build your supply more, i wish i had done it sooner! i also wish i got breastshells sooner as i leaked A LOT and prob could have saved some expressing time! hope this helps!

GladysLeap · 16/01/2012 17:18

In your shoes I would try to get the support in place before the birth. Contact LLL or the NCT and tell them what happened last time. It does sound like the latch was all wrong.

Support in hospital is generally useless. You need to get someone to watch you feed in the early days. Do you have BF cafe near you?

As for feeding with the toddler, can you get together a goody box that you can bring out for him only when you are feeding? Different toys/ books, whatever he likes to do? There is always Cbeebies - it's not forever Grin

mendipgirl · 17/01/2012 12:12

I had a nightmare with DD1 and with DD2 it has been so easy. I don't know really what the difference was apart from it being a different baby, but I know that before I had DD2 I had decided I wasn't going to put myself through it all again and if it didn't work I would happily give her formula with no guilt and not stress about it so much.

I wonder if the fact I was a lot more relaxed about it meant that it was actually easier.

However as far as practical tips go I'm not sure what I can offer, apart from what the others have said about getting advice beforehand and trying not toi worry about it.

Also re the feeding with a toddler...I went with cbeebies in the end - happy toddler, happy baby, happy mummy.

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