Struggling to bf DS during the day

[MightilyOats]

DS is 13 weeks old and exclusively breastfed - tried him with a bottle a day or two ago and he didn't remember what to do with it. In the last couple of weeks I have been struggling to get him latched on during the day - he arches his back, cries, squirms and generally gets quite upset. Sometimes I just put him down again, thinking I must have misread a cue and he's not hungry; sometimes he will latch on if I screen the outside world with a muslin over his head. If I do get him to latch on he will generally only have a quick feed, so isn't getting a full belly.

As a consequence he is now waking every couple of hours in the night for a feed - and he's properly hungry and takes a decent amount each time. He used to only wake once or twice in the night, so I'm getting very tired...

What's causing this? He's showing signs of teething starting (dribbling, everything going into mouth and grislyness) but is generally happy enough... until I start to feed him! What can I do???

Hey

I can't help but DS (19 weeks) is very similar. Not such a protest to get him on but he gets very frustrated whilst there (kicking his feet, lots of frustrated noises) and then at the slightest noise will crane his head around to see what's going on and finds something more interesting to do than eat.

Hopefully a sage BFeeder will be along with some life altering, sleep inducing advice

Feed when he is sleepy, before or after nap. See Kellymom for more info.

Wriggly babies! argh!

It might help you if you go back to basics with him - try him in the newborn baby breastfeeding hold, hand on the back of his shoulders, body up high etc. Sometimes mums (like me, I know I did!) get so used to just bunging the baby on by the time they are this age, that positioning and latch go by the by. It might help to remind him what he's supposed to be doing!

Are the feeds ok when he is latched on? No pain?

It's normal. There's too much going on in the world to just stare at acres of skin. I mean there's a dog and a woman with a limp and a tree and look a car.

Dim rooms sometimes help, feeding before/after and even during a nap, get a bfing necklace so they can play with that, sing to them and get them to look at/listen to you. Trial and error I'm afraid.

I have a 19 week old ds who is exactly the same. So was dd at this age.

The drooling, putting things in their mouths, whingy stuff is developmental too and not teething. Though teething is always possible of course. They put things in their mouths because they have lots of nerve endings there and are exploring, the dribbling is partly this too and to do with their physical development, nose breathing etc and the whiny behaviour is frustration at being stuck inside their bodies but growing awareness of the big, exciting world.

And they can feed v efficiently at this age. A full stomach can happen v quickly.

Thanks for the replies

Pookamoo - no pain thankfully, I gave up the nipple shields at Christmas (TT and I was sore for weeks) and though his latch is rubbish it doesn't hurt and he gets the milk out pretty well.

SOH - I think its a mix of teething and development, he loves putting stuff in his mouth, hands, rattle etc and gets a lot of pleasure out of it, but other times he is definitely chewing his fingers (and mine) really hard and has been getting red cheeks and very runny in the poo dept.

Glad to hear its normal, hoping its just a phase...

Oh and meant to say thanks for the hugs Val when's your trip?

Tomorrow - eek!!

No help I'm afraid, but just to say I share your pain! I could have written your post myself. My 14 week ds will only feed just after a nap (and I mean just - if I miss the 5 min window then the chance has gone). Incredibly frustrating and can result in him going 5 hours in the day between feeds and gradually getting angrier (him) and frustrated (me). Been to breastfeedimg support but no advice apart from to wait it out. He's still putting on weight and is alert and happy if we manage to get milk in him. Nights are fine - he's clearly waking up more to ensure he gets the calories he's missing in day but at least he's not crying screaming and pulling away at the breast.

Can anyone confirm if it is a phase? I'm not sure I can cope with for much longer. Mind you, he won't take a bottle so not much choice! Sympathies to others suffering in same way.

Yes after a while they can manage to do staring and feeding. Sorry can't remember when exactly.

Have you tried feeding standing up or lying down smudge? I just managed to feed ds to sleep by lying on the living room floor next to his nap mat. I know what you mean about frustrating! The kellymom website is pretty useful though, about coaxing the baby back to the breast (link somewhere above I think).

Have a lovely time Val lucky so-and-so...

I remember mine being really awkward and nosey at this age too! I am one of those people who didn't really enjoy breastfeeding and I think you just have to take it one day at a time and persevere and they get easier again. This is most probably notmuch help, but I do feel your pain!

the arching the back, fussing etc can be signs of silent reflux - might be worth a trip to gp for some gaviscon (mix with small amount of BM or water and give on a spoon or by syringe before feed and it basically makes the top layer of milk form a sort of jelly so the acid can't bubble up... might not be but worth a try if no improvement x

My DS is exactly like this!! That link to the "distractible baby" on Kellymom that Albrecht added is really helpful. I was beginning to take it personally, like he didn't want to bfeed anymore, but apparently this is a stage, common between 4 and 5 months. I am really sick of all the latch-suck for 10 seconds-pull off cycle, it's driving me mad!! Feel like I can't feed during the day unless in absolutely silent environment (impossible with a 4 year old about as well!). Hopefully it is just a phase!