how long should my baby be going between feeds- feeling ready to give up

[whimsicalquark]

my dd is 8 weeks old now and I thought I had cracked the breastfeeding lark. for the first few weeks she was going a nice 3-4 hours between feeds with nice long naps during the day. Now we seem to be going backwards and often its only an hour between feeds with cluster feeding in the evening lasting anything from 6pm to 11pm. she also will not nap properly during the day and will sleep for maximum of 20 mins or so ,no sooner have you tucked her in then she wakes up and screams. Night time is fine, once she has finally stopped eating she will sleep quite happily from 11-7 only waking up to feed twice maximum and she settles by herself back to sleep. its just the daytime, i feel i cant do anything or go anywhere and its really getting to me, i just need reassurance that this is normal and that it will get easier

You were very lucky to have a BFed baby going 3-4 hours between feeds in the day so young. Or maybe unlucky, because it won't have built your supply up the same way very frequent feeding at first would. Sleeping 11-7 is remarkable, as well. So it's not normal in that you are rather luckier than a lot of mums, although I am sure it doesn't feel like that! Every hour is perfectly natural. 8 weeks is very little still and your dd will not only be hungry, but wanting to be cuddled up close to mummy, and what better way of making her happy is there than BFing?

Oh, I noticed she wakes up twice in the night! Well, very very normal, I'd say.

Hourly feeds sounds better than 3-4 hourly - that's a bit too long for breastfed babies. Some babies are a bit sleepy in the first few weeks and it takes them a while to wake up and get breastfeeding established.

Day time naps, you might have more luck having her nap in a sling or the buggy, or by going to bed with her. I used to quite often feed ds to sleep in my arms, then just sit on the sofa with him and watch a movie while he slept - occasionally sticking a nipple back in his mouth if he stirred!

\Are you worried about breastfeeding in public? I remember feeling a bit worried about going out when my son was little and someone here suggested feeding in front of a mirror just to see how little I was exposing myself. was such a good tip.

I also found ds went longer between feeds if we got out and about. If we were lounging around at home he was on the breast all the time, but if I fed him then put him in the sling and went out he'd go 3 hours.

I'd say your baby has recently 'woken up' as in is coming out of that sleepy baby stage and is more aware of things.

I assure you, its perfectly normal. Don't let it get you down, it won't be forever. I remember feeling like all I ever did was bf. In our culture it seems so difficut to maintain feeding as we're expected to be up and about doing 'normal' things so quickly. I made myself a little nest and just spent day snuggling up. A good stash of films and books is a must.

DS is now 10 months and feeding less and I do miss sitting round feeding him all day now I'm chasing him all day although at first I hated it

thanks for all your responses. im glad hourly feeding is considered quite normal. I do worry about breastfeeding in public, I still havent attempted it, if i go out its either to a friend or relatives house which i dont mind feeding in or i express and take bottles unless we are going near somewhere that has a feeding room (although im still uncomfortable in those I dont know why) My baby is so noisy I dont think I could ever feed discretely, she growls and fidgets before I get her on and then once shes on shes like a pig at a potato which makes the idea of feeding in front of people worse. I suppose i will have to bite the bullet and just do it otherwise im going to be stuck in the house for the next few months

I'm going through exactly the same thing with other problems involved! How is DD otherwise? E.g nappies etc? I felt that DD was snacking and causing her alsorts of problems! She would be feeding every hour sometimes 2! I've got 2 more dc and caouldnt do anything!!

I found feeding in feeding rooms daunting as they are so quiet!

A busy cafe or bench (pref. indoors at this time of year) in a crowded area seemed so much easier - lots of noise, everyone busy going about their business and no one pays attention to anyone else let alone the mum cuddling her baby.

My DD can be similar going onto the breast, headbutting and grunting! If we're out and she's like that then I'll put a pashmina over my shoulder.

my DD was v much like yours at the same age. Crap napper, good sleeper at night at went 3-4 hours between feeds from v early on but then we got a bit muddled. It took me a good couple of weeks to work out i wasn't picking up her sleep cues early enough, so she was then getting in a state where she was too hungry to take a good nap and too tired to take a good feed. Once i got better at recognising when she was sleepy and fighting it, life got a lot simpler again!

I have a crap napper here as well. DD is 8 weeks on Tuesday. And sometimes she will make feeding cues whilst she's also yawning her head off and she has to be persuaded to take a nap. If I put her in a sling, she's off immediately though.

Like others have said, taking her out seems to mean that she does get some kind of a daytime nap as she nods off when we are out with her pram.

At night time, she's usually off to sleep at about 11.30 and then sleeps in 3 hour bursts waking up to be fed and then she goes straight back off to sleep again and we continue like that until about 9am. The last couple of nights, she's woken up every two hours instead of three though and I've just gone with what she wants.

In the evening she also cluster feeds from about 7pm onwards and it's difficult to get my evening meal down me so DH and I take it in turns to eat and distract her just for a tiny bit so that we can eat!

So OP I would say that at this age, what we're going through appears to be the norm!

My dd is 10 weeks and exactly the same.she sleeps well at night but wants to b fed almost constantly in the day. She only has the odd ten minute nap . It's more frustrating cos she used to have good naps too in the day but stopped at about 6 weeks. I know how tough it is but u r doing a fantastic job . Keep it up!