6 months and refusing the bottle just as I'm going back to work!! eek

[expatnow]

Title says it all, really. My 6 month old is EBF. I have a freezer full of breast milk in preparation for me having to go back to work (flexible hours, mind). She has taken a bottle in the past, but I haven't really given one to her regularly. Now 4 attempts spaced out over the past two weeks and she has flat out refused the bottle. Turns her head, screams, cries etc. I started her on solids (BLW) a couple of weeks ago and she has really taken to it. But not sure what to do if I am away for 4 hours or more. Keep persevering with the bottle? try the Doidy cup? Not worry and just get DH/ CM to offer solids instead? Any ideas- it is freaking me out! My other DD was BF for a year but also took bottles very easily, so I didn't have to face this.

6 mth old babies in this situation (dislike of bottle) can use cups - no need for a struggle with bottles! She can continue to bf direct from you when you are around.

Obv she will need a bit of help with the cup for a while.

I'm no expert but my friend is also having this problem at the moment. She is trying different bottles (borrowing different brands from friends so she doesn't waste money if they're no good), also a sippy cup. Her baby will also take milk from a spoon which takes ages!

watching with interest

Hi I am having the exact same problem, my babs is 7months just and we've been bf exclusively until 6months when we introduced solids. I've managed to replace 3main meals with solids and he has 3milk feeds a day. He unfortunately does not sleep through and wakes between 2-3times a night for milk which is now starting to take its toll.
I am trying to wean onto bottles but he's refusing, I've tried various bottle teats cups and spoons with both expressed milk and follow on. He was drinking water from a beaker but when we put milk in it he wouldn't take it. So we thought we'd go back to just breast and bottles to limit confusion for him but feel we're stuck!
We've tried warmer fluids, various times of day, different people, dream feeds warmed teats etc but no joy....can any one help with other ideas before I go mad and have to bf until he's 20!!!!!

What is the best way to stop bf x

I went back to work when DD was 6 months - and remembering the battle I had with DS to get him on the bottle, I asked the HV if I could just BF DD when I was with her, and have her drink water and eat solids during the day when she was at nursery. This worked perfectly for us and my DD didn't suffer (although we did end up BFing in the nursery carpark every day for about four months as she would fuss at my boobs from the second I came in!). DD did eventually take a bottle of expressed milk (to start with nursery gave it to her via a spoon, the little princess) but in her own time. I got myself so upset with DS in your situation and it made me determined to be more laid-back this time around. I did start a thread somewhere on this re expressing and there was loads of brilliant information on this whole area. Good luck you will both do it.

Oh re stopping BFing - GRADUALLY is the best way. I was crippled with agony going cold turkey with DS but it's easy doing it over time - though I nearly stopped and seem to have started again so not a great example .

That happened to me. Baby just got given water in a sippy cup (lid but no valve) with meals (and in between) plus other dairy products like yoghurt, unsalted cheese etc. and we made up for the breastfeeds when we were together.

I wouldn't bother with bottles tbh. They are a pita to prepare and clean and then you're stuck with the problem of weaning off them, not to mention the fact that they're not ideal for the developing jaw.

hth

Thank you-did your baby's sleep through, this is my main reason for giving up as I'm shattered. Had real probs starting to breastfed had matitus twice through expressing after sore nipples so didnt really want to go own that road.....thought follow on may help! My little one is a large baby and very active he was 7 months on the 1st jan but us in 9-12 month clothes (edging out of these) as he's very long bless him and he's walking around with limited help so I'm assuming he's burning loads of cals and I'm struggling to keep up with him. It is stressing both me and my other half out as that's all we talk about, I feel I almost force feeding him and it feels awful! Xx

TBH I can't remember. Probably not, but I co-slept. My research showed me that if babies wake for milk, they wake for milk, and bfing was a lot easier than making up bottles in the middle of the night and I didn't need the added jobs of cleaning and sterilising etc.

I kept the baby with me and went to bed early. If you aim for 10 hours sleep then even if you wake 4 times in the night for half hour feeds, you still get your 8 hours, but tbh I slept through most feeds anyway as the baby was in bed with me.

Wow good idea hadn't really calculated it like that.... We've followed gina ford routine which has helped in some ways but hindered in others. We struggled to get pregnant and 3 years of trying naturally and 3 fertility treatments we were blessed with rocco so I was very cautious and followed the 6months in with me and then we put him in his own room at Christmas which he coped with really well, I've never had him in bed with me he's always slept in his cot, but I've made the mistake of bf him to sleep and now can't break that. So he needs the boob to go to sleep....arh!!!!

Well sometimes the GF routine can mean that during the day the baby could have more milk but isn't getting it, so catches up at night when there is the least resistance/less distraction etc.

It works for some babies, for certain, but popping in an extra one or two offerings of a feed might also help with the night.

Do you mean in the daytime? Try and squeeze a few more feeds in....solids or milk? Xx

I went back when my DD was 7mo. She learned to take a bottle in nursery, I think because she just want to be the same as the other babies. By 8mo she was down to 20-30ml during the day, and has dropped all milk feeds during the day before 9mo. I really don't think you need to worry. If your LO is taking to solids well already, then they'll simply increase their intake of solids to compensate. And KirstyKool, mine wakes only once for milk, but that isn't the same as sleep through. Obviously she isn't hungry. But like last night, she woke at 2:30 for milk. Then sat in her cot till 3:30 playing with her soft toys while babbling, very loudly. Then she got upset and started whinging, so she joined us in the big bed, and wasn't back to sleep till 4:30ish. I've offered my boobs many times in desperation that she'll suck herself to sleep. She just won't even latch on!

He's quite good then, he will feed for 15-30mins then goes straight back to sleep and I can put him in his cot with little murmur....do you think I'm expecting too much? All my friends bottle feed their babies with formula and have from day one and all seem to sleep through with no probs so haven't had anything to compare to.. Xx

Here are a few things to try...someone else giving her the bottle, try a new location like out at a cafe, give her something interesting to watch (washing machine, cat etc) while bottle feeding so that facing out is appealing, letting her play with the bottle for a while first or try a cup instead.

I really like Elizabeth Pantley's no cry sleep solution. If nothing else, it assures you that not sleeping through is normal. Every baby is different, I think I'm just stuck with one that wakes up for play. She's worse in growth spurt. I remember nights where she woke up and started singing. And then there's the roll to end of cot, stuck and cry to be rolled back. Just a few weeks ago, she's learning to crawl, and every night as her trying to head butt me and DH on the big bed because she would not stop shuffling back and forth.

I've just tried to keep it as quiet and peaceful as possible at night, no lights. Letting her know it's not playtime. BTW, she slept through before 3mo, and has just grown to a very bad sleeper after 6mo when she became aware.

Yes I think youre right it does seem to be normal...even though your baby wakes she appears to be a very contented and joyfull hard to get annoyed when shes happy to be awke I'm sure xx

Thanks all. It is making me feel better that it might be an idea not to push the bottle. Last time my DD was using a doidy cup for water so I think I should try to introduce that now. I'm lucky because I could get home to feed her after 4 hours most days. My main concern is that whomever is looking after her will find her inconsolable. So trying to figure out how to arm them with! Thanks for the advice.

PS mine isn't "sleeping through" She wakes 1-2 times a night but BFs and then goes straight back to sleep. I figure she needs it and like Starlight I just try to go to bed super early when I can.

You need persevere!! It really needs someone other than you to get your baby on to a bottle initially!! It is hard work but when baby realises that it's bottle or nothing then he/she will take it! I have just gone through the same thing with my dd. Day one, dh gave dd bottle before bed and she took a couple of ounces and I then bf her before she went to bed. Following 2 nights this was repeated and dd took a little more milk. After a week dd now takes the bottle happily from anyone and only has bf during the middle of the night if she wakes. All I can say is that it isn't very pleasant initially and is a bit of a fight but keep at it!! Good luck!!

I feel your frustration! I had this with dd a littler earlier than yours. I needed to go in to hospital as not all placenta had come away, dd was 14 weeks and had taken bottle previously but we didn't keep it up (partly cos I was lazy and couldnt be doing with the sterilising/expressing etc!!) but she 'forgot' how to take it. We had 2 weeks before my op to get her on one and I had so many people say, don't worry/she won't starve etc but I still stressed. We tried every day at each feed (just putting 1oz in bottle), just tried for a couple of min before giving her breast. She eventually took on 12 hours before my operation; talk about cutting it fine! Tips that worked for us:

• DH fed her, not me. Get someone other than yourself to feed her.
• leave the room or even house, LO will smell you/your milk
• try her with a sippy cup (she's older than mine was so wasn't an option but we spoon fed and cup fed her and it eventually got her used to taking something other than boob!)
• feed LO in a completely different position to how u breast feed
• try feeding her with bottle or sippy cup before her normal feed times
• persevere! My DH did so well in the 2 weeks; remained calm (it was me who was more distraught that she was crying for food) and talked to LO about what we were doing. I genuinely think she gave in because she knew we would keep trying to stick a bottle near her.

Hope this helps. Let us know how u get on.

Oh forgot to mention; she will now have a bottle but only if it is at the right temperature!! She's a right bloody diva, won't have it too cool. DH says if anything, she has it a bit warmer than she should. God help us when we come to wean and she eats cold foods! She'll be in for a shock!! Lol x

Ps excuse typos on previous one, on phone and thinking faster than i can type!

But the problem with starving at 6mo or over is that you don't necessarily end up replacing bf with formula. The baby will be eating increasing amount of solids. Unless you are starting with the night feeds first, are you going to withheld solids too?

For example if you say let's replace the morning feed with a bottle. Baby has breakfast at 8 and lunch at 12. It's entirely conceivable she won't be so hungry that she caves in to the bottle by the time you come to lunch. Its only 4 hours afterall. And most mums will want their babies to eat their solids well. I can't see us not giving the lunch.

Bayliss the bedtime probably doesn't work for us when we got to 3 meals at 6mo. DD has dinner at 5.30, bath at 6 pm, and bed bf. I very very much doubt she is actually hungry. If I don't dream feed, she doesn't wake up till sometime between 12-2. I just don't see anyone fancy battling a bottle at the wee hours.

Her 3 meals are usually at 8, 12 and 5.30. The longest gap is only just 5.5 hours in the afternoon.

Thanks for tips- we have tried all suggested: I don't offer her the bottle, someone else does; different position. I like the idea of not pushing the bottle and instead trying the cup and otherwise let her have solids until we are together. I imagine she will take the bottle if we persevere, but my main concern is that it is a stressful situation for DH or CM and I really don't want it to be upsetting or stressful for DD or whomever is looking after her. I can do a short day and so she would only need to go 4 hours or so without milk. Do you think I should start a routine so she knows what she is getting and when- let's say BF at 7:30 just before I go to work, solid snack at 10 and then solid lunch at 12 and then a BF as soon as I pick her up? Would that work?

Since I have all the EBM in the freezer I could send her with that so they could mix it in with cereal and try the cup.

Thanks again- I feel reassured!