advice please, bf to ff at 6 months

[nearlyreadytopop]

DS is 26 weeks and has just started weaning.
I have had bf issues from the start, traumatic delivery, scbu, sore nipples, vasospasm, tt (snipped at 20 weeks). Now to top it all of a dose of hellish mastitis and the return of a really sore nipple. I am at an all time low concerning breastfeeding, mentally and physically.
I didnt think I would still be feeding at 6 weeks never mind 6 months and I thought when I got to this day I would be so proud and have the whole bf thing sorted. In my ideal world I would feed DS until he weaned.
But instead I am so sad, and sore and tired. I am sick of being sore but at the same time broken hearted that I wont feed him myself anymore. I dont think I can keep doing this for another 6 months. In the past 6 months I have had painfree feeds for about a month and now with the mastitis my nipple is so so sore. The swelling, heat and breast pain have reduced a lot but the nipple pain is awful.
DH thinks enough is enough, he supported me through the really bad times before the TT snip beacuse he knows how much it means to me but now Im back to dreading feeds. I cant bear to latch him on one side and have been pumping on that side every 2 hours and giving it to him by bottle.

I would love some advice from mums who have moved from breast to formula at 6 months or any wise words/thoughts. He will take a bottle but is already getting on well with a free flow beaker.

You should award yourself a medal for breast feeding for 6 months and having surmounted so many obstacles. You have given your DC the best possible start in life. You might be sad that it needs to end now but think of what you have achieved!!!!

Of course great if you could go on, but you sound exhausted and right now DS and DH and you need you to get well. Do, look after yourself, you are not a milk machine you are a mother and there is so much more you are giving!!.

If mastitis and nipple pain are on the same side than of course you could feed unilaterally if you really want to.

Personally i never used bottles from the point where they could handle a beaker...no need and so much easier to clean a free flow!

Look after yourself

Breastfeeding changes at 6 months plus as they lose interest in milk as they eat more food

Don't think about doing this or the next 6 months - take each day as it comes, maybe even each feed

The mastitis will clear up but it's really painful

Well done for getting this far

thank you foolonthehill for your very kind words. I have to be very careful about latch as because he was TT for so long I dont think he really knows how to do it properly so sometimes the good side can pinch a bit but mostly its fine. Hopefully seeing someone for a chat about this tomorrow. I can honeslty say ive never felt so low before so I worry that I am not making the right decision :( I just want whats best for him and to me that is my milk but I need to balance that out with having spent most of our first christmas together in tears. I have run out of 'tomorrow it will be better'

Well done. It sounds like you've had a terrible run of it. My sister is living through the same thing. Right now, at 6 months she mix feeds.

If you want to stop now try dropping one feed for a few days, then if everything is ok (the last thing you want is more mastitis) you can drop another if you want.

Your baby has wonderful parents who obviously really want the best. If you are truly miserable it's ok to stop. It's also ok to carry on or anything inbetween.

thanks Rubyslippers, I took it one feed at a time for quite a while so I suppose I need to go back to that.
Do you know is it normal for there to be a lot of nipple pain as well as breast pain with mastitis?

Could it be a plugged duct as well as/instead of mastitis? Info on the two here. Nipple pain isn't usually listed as a symptom of mastitis it's self but a sore cracked nipple can be a point of entry for an infection to cause mastitis. This has lots of information on different types of nipple pain and what can be the cause of them.

Taking each feed as it comes is a good plan, it doesn't have to be all or nothing (self weaning or stop now), and taking it feed by feed can mean that if you just can't face a feed, you give food/formula instead and revisit it at the next feed (just don't forget to express as if you have mastitis you need to keep the milk flowing to avoid it getting worse).

What treatment have you got/tried for the mastitis?

Gp gave antibiotic as there was no improvement after a day of me trying to sort it myself. Have been taking ibuprofen and paracetamol too. Hot showers and gentle massage combined with Ds,s super suck has got things going again. The redness and tenderness is much reduced leaving me with a sore nipple. Thanks truthsweet for the info.
Regarding supply, if i continue to express from the sore side and top up with formula as necessary Will my supply drop?

probably a little but he will soon sort that out if you decide to keep BFing supply goes up and down all the time according to demand so don't worry too much about that

Just to update you all and say thank you.
We are back to feeding from the breast. I have a bit of nipple damage from trying to feed on the infected breast so back to basics with the latch and hopefully it will heal soon.
And to top it all of Ds slept from 10 to 5 last night! Its amazing much better I feel.
Thank you all for your encouragement it means a lot

Bless you and well done!!
May the sleep continue