Doubts about dream feed

[xlatia]

I've got several friends with small babies who swear by doing a dream feed. Somehow to me the entire concept seems wrong, I cannot quite say why though. Probably because I wouldn't want to be stuffed immediately before going to bed myself. So what do you think?

I found it an odd idea, but partly because I was EBF-ing, doing it on demand, and so trying to 'sneak' a feed into a baby that wasn't asking for it seemed counter intuitive.

I also felt from what I read that it was to do with FF, not BF - lots of references to 'dad doing the dreamfeed' etc. Again, it was counter to the whole 'feed on demand' thing I was doing elsewhere.

I know the thinking is purely 'tank them up so they will sleep longer before waking up hungry' - but I thought, surely if they aren't hungry, they won't take it...? Babies that aren't hungry don't feed, do they?

On reflection, I think the 'dreamfeed' is just part of a very scheduled approach to feeding which didn't have any relevance to the way I was feeding DS.

I was always very pro-dream feed.... until i had my own baby who is now 3m old

i have concluded that waking her just upsets her, she is too tired to actually drink, then only sleeps for 20 - 30 mins longer than if i hadnt bothered.

so i dont bother anymore

saying that she slept 8.5 hours last night (7pm - 3.30) so that makes me think it would be great if that 8 hours could begin at 11pm

I have breastfed two babies and did a dreamfeed with both of them. It made sense to me to do the last feed of the day just before you went to bed so that they did their longest sleep when you are asleep. It worked for me, if I didn't do it they would generally wake up an extra time, but I know it doesn't work for everyone.

I'm a maternity nurse and probably one of the few that don't advocate a dream feed if the family is ok with not giving it. Most of my families do however want routines so we start very gently with them. For the past four years not one of my charges has had a dream feed and all of them have been sleeping 7pm - 3 - 5amish by 12 weeks (then feeding and sleeping again until 7amish), one has slept 7pm - 8am and another slept 7pm - 7am at 12 weeks.

It just means that I head to bed early 9/10pm and get good sleep before baby awakes, the parents also get in the habit of going to bed early. Works well for everyone.

I do a dream feed with my EBF DD, and not with a bottle. Somehow DD can latch on in her sleep if I put her into cradle hold with her facing my boob. She is asleep through the whole process. I go to bed at 9/10pm. With a dream feed it means she won't wake up before around 2.

I do dream feeds with my EBF DD almost through-out the whole night! She goes to bed at 19.30, then I join her at 22.00 (we co-sleep) and offer her a breast as we are both lying down - she hasn't refused yet! Through-out the night if she surfaces I pop a breast in there for good measure! She ends up eating a lot but there is no crying, so pros and cons really.

I dreamfeed my ebf ds (when be doesn't demand a feed at that time anyway!). As I pick him up he opens his mouth to feed! It's a lovely calm feed and he does go longer than if I didn't do it (have experimented).
My HV said that demand feeding doesn't always have to wait for him to ask for it - so its ok to feed earlier if its convenient, if we're going out, or for the dreamfeed.

Worked for my two. In fact this was the one feed where i used ebf and so dh often gave it. Still have lovely memories of a very gentle peaceful feed with asleeping baby at the end. Youngest ds is now 8!

I tried the dreamfeed when my son was around 2 months and then again recently around 5 months. Tried it over a few nights. Bf him whilst he was asleep and it didnt wake him.

However it never worked and he always woke up at the usual time around an hour later and wanted another usual length feed. So it made no difference to his sleep.

as a night nanny I always swore by the dream feed however since having my own who is now almost 16mths I dont believe it works for all babies.

Ours would wake whether I dream fed or not and so we used to feed at 7pm and he fed for an hr (actually fed for an hr at bedtime til he was 13mths! now its 20mins) and down at 8pm - and this was from 7wks and he then woke at 12pm, 4am and prob only did 45mins stints after 4am. From 9wks we were doing 8pm til 4am and this stretched to 5am, 6am and eventually 7am by 15wks I think at 12wks we were feeding at 7pm down at 8pm and going til 5am which is same as dream feed at 10pm and going til 6/7am in terms of time and worked for us. (prior to 7wks old we were feeding every 2hrs for an hr and was hard hard work)

thanks for all the replies! i thought that dreamfeeding always meant giving the baby a bottle of extra thick formula. at least that's what my friends do, even if they BF their babies at all other feeds and that's why i find it so strange. but if it works with BFing as well, i might give it a whirl. DS (8 weeks) is feeding for 30 mins every 2 hours (day and night), which starts getting to me i must admit...

That sounds hard Xlatia. Mine both did every two hours too (well, the six month old still does a lot of the time), but they only feed for 10 minutes.

We are another who have found a dream feed doesn't do much. The only benefit was a period when DD2 was waking about 11pm. Giving her a feed when I went to bed at 10.30 was close enough to when she'd wake up that she was hungry and started another cycle of sleep, so I'd tend to get a solid two hour block at the start of the night.

I think the idea that a dream feed magically moves a baby's longest block of solid sleep to when you go to bed is absolute bollocks used to sell books rather iffy. For some babies it will work. But the longest block of sleep is about so many things, including importantly the fact that you are most tired at the start of the night, so the biological imperative to sleep is strongest when you have just gone to bed.

My 17 week old only goes down between 9 and 10 so I head to bed soon after. SHe is 'up' between 4 and 5 for a feed. When I say up, she is wriggling round cot making noises and little shouts for me. I pick her up and BF her, she never opens her eyes, feeds for 15-25 mins, some times both breasts has a cuddle and a back rub then is put back down and will sleep a further 2 to3 hours. Even when she gets up again she feeds with eyes shut. I guess this is dream feeding but she does it herself. I guess if she was going down at 7 or 8 I would try it. But she has never settled early and ive only recently managed to get this down from almost midnight. I did try leaving her a 5 to see if she'd settle herself but she just gets upset, she is obviously hungry so I'm expecting to do this until she is weaned in a couple of months. I can't complain though I do get lots of sleep with this pattern.

Xlatia I do feel for you my first fed every 2 hours and it was hard.

I did a dream feed with my two at 10.30 and they started to sleep through until 6ish very quickly