4-month old only bottle feeds from Mum

[EleanorJane]

My 4 month old daughter has recently stopped taking a bottle from anyone other than me. She was BF for the first five weeks and during this time also had a bottle of expressed milk given by her Dad. Since becoming exclusively on the bottle she has been fine at feeding and Dad has given her a bottle occasionally and although she hasnt taken it as well as she does off me, she has had it.

Over the last 3-4 weeks she has simply refused to take a bottle from anyone else. This has meant that on 2 or 3 occasions she has gone to bed with no milk as I have not been around to do the bedtime routine. She is VERY clingy to me, which is fine most of the time, but I am starting to panic as I am returning to work at the end of January and am dreading taking her to daycare as she grizzles (which eventually turns into a scream) if ANYONE else picks her up. Dad keeps trying to feed her - yesterday she had a little which is the best she has been for a few weeks, but then back to nothing again today. So she ends up being given the bottle from me - not good when I will be back at work for 3 days a week in about 6 weeks' time.

Does anyone have any helpful advice? I have never posted on one of these forums before, so apologies if I have babbled on a bit!! Thanks very much.

It does sound quite normal (if stressful!) for a baby to be very attached to their mum, even over and above dad or anyone else.

Does she have any settling days at the nursery that you can go on with her so that she get used to the nursery and her key worker?

Would Dad wearing one of your cardis (a good look!) or a scarf that smells of you while he feeds her help? Then you could send it in with her to nursery too.

Thanks - yes, she should have at least 3 'settling in days' at nursery, so hopefully that will help; although she is not even liking her Grandma at the moment and she has seen her more frequently! I know its normal for them to be more attached to the Mum, since she spends the majority of her time with me and in a way it is lovely, knowing that she loves me like that, but I just hate the thought of having to leave her knowing she wont feed and will scream all day :-( good tip on leaving something with her Dad like something I have worn during the day, will try tomorrow. Cheers :-)

My DD is 6 weeks and will only take a bottle from DH if I am in the room too. Let me know if you work out a solution!

tried the cardigan trick tonight to no avail :-( boo hoo

Sorry to hear that. Wracking my brains to think of other things to try....

Does skin to skin with dad help?

Have you tried a different type of bottle? Bottle A with mum and Bottle B with dad/nursery?

I am not a formula feeder, but since the suggestions so far don't seem to have worked I thought I'd just add a thought if that is ok?

Firstly, six weeks is ages in the life of a tiny baby, so this phase may pass by itself before you have to go back to work.

But the other thing I wondered is whether it is really about feeding? It was around this age that both Dd's stopped settling for anyone else except me for a while. She's just starting to learn that you and she are separate entities. Could you try snuggling up and spending a day giving masses of cuddles (or using a sling if you like them), and then having your husband feed her whilst you still cuddle her?

As I said, just a random thought. I had a friend who had a similar problem, but I don't profess to be an expert.

Will definitely try skin to skin, thanks.

I agree, I don't just think it's about feeding - she doesn't like going to anyone else at all really. It's just the feeding (or lack of) that worries me the most.

Like you say though, sometimes they do grow out of these phases themselves, I certainly hope so otherwise returning to work will be a nightmare :-(

Thanks ladies :-)